Month: July 2018

Categories
Letter From The Editor Opinion

Keeping the Light Alive

“If you hate democracy and think local governments should operate unchecked and in the dark, then today is a good day for you.”

That’s a tweet from New York Daily News editor Jim Rich, in response to his newspaper’s management’s announcement Monday that it was cutting the paper’s newsroom staff in half, leaving the DN with just 45 reporters and editors. Rich was among those who got the ax.

The Daily News owners, the Chicago-based Tronc, announced in a staff memo that it would refocus its remaining staff on breaking news about “crime, civil justice, and public responsibility.” Whatever that means.

It’s become an all-too-familiar story in recent years, as daily newspapers around the country get squeezed for profits by out-of-town corporate owners. Most newspapers are now about as local as your nearest Walmart.

The Denver Post is another example. The newspaper’s owner is “vulture capitalist” Randall Smith, whose company, Digital First Media, also owns major daily papers in St. Paul, San Jose, Orange County, California, and elsewhere. Smith’s “business model” is to lay off massive numbers of editorial staffers and wring profits from the shell of what’s left. His 17 percent profit margin is the envy of the industry. His company’s newspapers are pathetic.

Closer to home, the Gannett Company has stripped The Commercial Appeal newsroom back to a small cadre of journalists and editors, most of whom you’ve never heard of. The paper still does some excellent reporting (see its recent election preview coverage), but too often it’s stuffed with Nashville-centric copy and odd non sequitur stories from around the country. Last week, for instance, readers were treated to a big story in the weekly entertainment and dining section about the Homegirl Cafe … in Los Angeles, complete with an “if you go” info box.

And the Flyer‘s alt-weekly compatriots around the country are not immune to corporate pressures either. Many have been corporately “chained” and, for the most part, have suffered mightily for it. Even local ownership can be perilous. At the Nashville Scene, once a proud and vital journalistic force in the state capital, new owners have forced out several respected writers, reporters, and editors, and the paper’s future direction and prospects are in question.

Even so, all is not lost. Some papers have figured out a business model that works. The New York Times and Washington Post are doing fine; paywall revenues have largely replaced advertising as their primary source of funding. But will that model work for papers that aren’t national in scope? We may soon find out.

Here in Memphis, for example, a new, much-discussed journalism venture is on the horizon — The Daily Memphian — staffed with a plethora of Commercial Appeal ex-pats, including Geoff Calkins, Jennifer Biggs, Chris Herrington, and many other familiar CA bylines. It will be run as a nonprofit with a paywall and charge $7 a month for access. There will be no print product.

Other news options hereabouts now include the Tri-State Defender, the Memphis Business Journal, and the Memphis Daily News. None of these publications are free.

In a poor city like Memphis, where 49 percent of the population doesn’t have broadband access, we at the Flyer believe having a free news option is important. Being able to pick up a free paper all over town means that access to news and information is available to anyone. Our website is free, as well. That’s been our philosophy for almost 30 years, and we’re sticking with it, thanks to our advertisers, who recognize that our 90-percent-plus pickup rate means their ads are being seen by tens of thousands of Memphians each week — and our hands-off local owners.

This year, we’ve launched a series we call the “Justice Project.” Thus far, we’ve published JP cover stories on food deserts, wealth, poverty, race, and the city council’s secrecy, with three more to come in 2018, including a story tentatively titled “Information Justice,” that will take a look at how Memphians get their news, and how that process is affected by their education and poverty levels.

We’ve also begun a “Frequent Flyer” membership program to help support our journalism (support.memphisflyer.com) and help keep it available for all, even those who can’t afford anything but a literally free press.

The Memphis media landscape is in flux, but I’m hopeful that all these options — old and new — will help keep the city’s residents informed and enlightened, because the fewer of us who are left “in the dark,” the better off we all are.

Categories
Food & Wine Food & Drink

Shaking things up at Grove Grill and Bounty on Broad.

Chip Dunham‘s given name is Jeffrey, just like his dad, Jeffrey Dunham, the chef/owner of Grove Grill. In fact, “Chip,” is short for, as it often is in these cases, “chip off the old block.”

One could make a pretty good argument that this is certainly the case for Chip, who was lured back to Memphis from Charleston about a year ago to take over the kitchen at Grove Grill.

Chip, who worked at such Charleston mainstays as Edmund’s Oast and the Glass Onion, recalls how he first got into the biz. Of course, it was through his dad. When he was a teenager, he needed a job. The obvious plan would be that he would work at the restaurant. Maybe as a busboy. But his dad told him that “cool people cook.” Chip was smitten with the idea, mainly because SpongeBob SquarePants was a cook.

Chip went away to culinary school and then off to Charleston.

As he explains it, he and his dad talk every day. The senior Dunham was telling the junior Dunham about the restaurant’s new decor and how the place needed a new vibe, something to shake things up at the restaurant, which had recently marked its 20th year.

“I wasn’t sold on it,” admits Chip.

But the idea of a new challenge made sense to him.

It took him about six months to feel at home. He calls his dad’s style traditional, while he would describe his cooking as encompassing refined techniques in a sort of country brasseries style. He’s started to make his mark on the menu, with dishes such as the Grilled Peaches and Heirloom Tomatoes. As Chip notes, the menu already had a grilled peach salad, but the new one is a more imaginative take with whipped feta spread on the plate and locally grown micro-arugula.

Another Chiptastic dish is the House Made Charcuterie Board, where everything is made in-house — salami, duck liver mousse, country ham, etc.

One thing Chip would like to do in his new role is TNT the old concept of Grove Grill, maybe draw some younger folks.

“I think people forget about us,” he says. “We’ve been around so long.”

He feels that folks view it as stuffy and expensive, which is not the case, he says.

To combat that idea, Grove Grill recently started hosting an open house series called Third Thursdays. It features craft cocktails, local beers, and fine wines as well as a selection of seasonal small plates. The next Third Thursday is August 16th.

Chip is particularly proud of the bar, which is his wife Amanda’s domain.

For now, Chip says he’s “pretty content.”

He says, “I’m excited to see how it goes.”

Grove Grill, 4550 Poplar, 818-9951, thegrovegrill.com

About eight months ago, Michael Tauer, a principal of Bounty on Broad, reached out to Mason Jambon. It seems that the ardor for the once white-hot restaurant, located in the Binghampton district, had cooled.

The first thing that Jambon suggested was that they ditch the gluten-free menu. He laughs at the memory. He was told that was off the table. So, he had dinner.

“It was the best meal I’ve had here in Memphis,” he recalls.

Jambon’s approach was to double-down on the restaurant. Where others may have cut staff and expenses to make up for lost profits, Jambon insisted that they invest in them. They rehabbed the bar and stocked up on expensive wines. They redid the craft cocktail menu and started holding special dinners like After the Hunt, which featured dishes of game meat.

Jambon flat-out calls Bounty chef Russell Casey an artist. Casey took over after Bounty founder Jackson Kramer left town. In his wake, he found he had to contend with the cult of Jackson Kramer.

Whereas Kramer liked to challenge people, Casey was more approachable with his food. But, he dared not touch the dishes that made Bounty’s name. So while you’ll still find those famous Pommes Frites, you can also order Casey’s Eggplant Lasagne, white wine-poached flounder, etouffee, and the Plum Sauce marinated Pork Tenderloin.

Casey says he liked to “build things from the bottom up.” He says he works with Indian influences using French techniques.

Next up, they’re planning on converting the old butchery into a private dining space.

All this effort seems to be working. Sales are up.

“We were giving people what they want,” says Jambon.

Bounty on Broad, 2519 Broad, 410-8131, bountyonbroad.com

Categories
News The Fly-By

Lynching Sites Project adds more Memphis markers

CREDIT: Lynching Sites Project

Communities can’t heal from wounds of the past without facing them first.

That is the premise behind the Lynching Sites Project (LSP) of Memphis, which aims to memorialize the known lynchings in the Shelby County.

Over the weekend, the group and community members gathered to dedicate its third marker, which commemorates the 1893 lynching and death of Lee Walker. Walker, a young black man accused of sexually assaulting two white women, was dragged from the Shelby County Jail by a mob, beaten, and then hanged in an alley near A.W. Willis and Front.

LSP was formed about two years ago, and it’s comprised of residents who “want the whole and accurate truth” to be known about people like Walker and other victims affected by racially motivated violence in the county’s history. Jessica Orians, media strategist for LSP, said the goal is to have an accurate historical marker at each site.

Lynching Sites Project

marker for Lee Walker

“Without the Lynching Sites Project, these horrors of the past would never be known,” Orians said. “We try to make things right by telling the entire story.”

The group is actively searching for lynching sites based on the NAACP’s 1940 definition of lynching: “There must be legal evidence that a person has been killed, and that he met his death illegally at the hands of a group acting under the pretext of service to justice, race, or tradition.”

Shelby County has a recorded number of 35 lynchings between the Civil War era and 1950. That’s more than any county in Tennessee.

Margaret Vandiver is the lead researcher in charge of identifying the victims and sites of the county’s lynchings. By studying historical documents and old newspapers, as well as interviewing surviving family members, Vandiver and a team of volunteers “piece together the stories of the victims,” Orians said.

“It’s a tiring and critical process,” Orians said. “It’s just like detective work.”

Vandiver and team are in the process of identifying two more lynching sites, which are expected to be confirmed by the end of the year.

Orians said many people are weary of the group’s work, questioning if incidents like lynchings should be be dug up from the past. But, Orians said without the project, people would never know the truth of the past and the victims would remain nameless.

“We try to turn on the light of truth,” Orians said, quoting Ida B. Wells. “The way to bring about racial healing is to make these sites known to the public. It’s important to us that these atrocities in history that no one knows or talks about can be brought to light so we can learn and heal the present racial tensions.”

Orians said memorializing the “horrific events” aids in moving forward and bands people together, by creating a sacred place where people can learn and heal.

In addition to the group’s work at lynching sites, they also meet bi-monthly, facilitating “listening circles,” where community members can come and talk through racial issues. Orians said the goal of the meetings is to figure out ways to move forward and heal the “painful wounds of the past that people are still bearing.”

Categories
News The Fly-By

Fly on the Wall 1535

Media Climate

Fly on the Wall’s media coverage has been uniquely critical of Memphis’ broadcast news outlets for a tendency to over-report sensational news with little followup or context to help viewers understand what the scary-sounding information may or may not mean for us.

So, it was an uncharacteristic surprise to catch three, whole, uninterrupted minutes of WMC meteorologist Nick Gunter explaining the fundamental (and non-political) difference between weather and climate.

Dammit, Gannett

Tom Charlier, a 32-year veteran reporter for the Gannett-owned Commercial Appeal, left the paper last week, bringing the number of name-brand journalists to leave there to just about everybody.

Meanwhile, in Indiana, members of the Indianapolis News Guild published an open letter to the Gannett-owned Indianapolis Star.

“We live here,” the letter concludes. “Our children walk the school hallways here. We join our friends by volunteering at nonprofits. We lock arms with our neighbors as we seek to build this community. We carry The Star’s values as we embed ourselves within our neighborhoods.

“So please understand: We want to be treated with basic respect.”

Good luck with that.

Categories
We Recommend We Recommend

Memphis Queerfest

Sometimes things end. That doesn’t mean they have to stop.

“There used to be this festival every year, but the guy who used to produce it left town,” says Brando Little, reducing the sturm and drang-filled last days of the Memphis Punk Rock Fest to a single, concise sentence. To fill this void of grit, glitter, and squalling guitars, Little, aka Harry Manhole, the singer and guitar player for Memphis’ punk band The Gloryholes, concocted a plan. “I thought I’d try to bring in a bunch of queer bands from out of town,” he says. And so, from the ashes of the Memphis Punk Rock Festival, Queerfest, two-days and 14-bands worth of LGBTQ-infused punk was born.

“There is a vibrant, underground queer punk-rock scene,” Little says, noting an irony in the home of Sun Studio. “Other than some of us on the fringes, Memphis’ gay community doesn’t have many aspects of rock-and-roll.

Power to the punks

“I wanted to bring that to Memphis,” Little says.

Local and out of town acts scheduled to play include Kansas City’s glam and metal-inspired Wick and the Tricks, Beg, Stay Fashionable, Wailing Banshees, Boyfriend, Tom Violence, Hormonal Imbalance, Sweaters Together, The Gloryholes, Spirit Cuntz, Exit Mouse, and Midtown Queer.

Loud guitars and snarling attitude won’t be the only thing on the menu. “We’ll also have comedy,” Little says.

Is Memphis Queerfest a one-off, or is it an annual event in the making? “I don’t know,” Little says. “I thought we’d bring in some bands, do this thing, and see how it goes.”

Categories
We Recommend We Recommend

Art of the South at Crosstown Arts

When you’re a natural fan and prompter of regional artists, sometimes the big challenge of assembling a large juried show isn’t always deciding which artists are selected. It can be more about laboring over who has to be cut. There’s only so much room in a gallery, after all.

That was the struggle for Brian R. Jobe, the juror for Number: magazine’s fifth annual Art of the South exhibit. As the co-director of the state-wide not-for-profit Locate Arts, Jobe is regularly engaged in promoting contemporary art in Tennessee. “There’s excellent work being made here that stacks up with the best art being made elsewhere,” he says. Jobe describes the opportunity to choose work for this show as “an invitation to extend [the enthusiasm] to an even wider block of states.”

Art of the South

For this year’s exhibit, the magic number is 57. From 170 submissions from states across the Southeast and the District of Columbia, that’s how many artists Jobe finally selected. Most of the selected pieces hang on a wall, but the generous exhibit also includes a healthy collection of sculpture and three films.

“If there is a theme, it’s a willingness to explore any theme, any narrative, and any material in a way that feels tied into a global contemporary art dialogue,” Jobe says. “It’s exciting to see just how connected [Southern artists] are with the world.”

Categories
Music Music Features

Joecephus & the George Jonestown Massacre Keep on Trucking

CREDIT: John Pickle

Joey Killingsworth’s band, Joecephus and the George Jonestown Massacre, has built up a good bit of name recognition over the 13 years they’ve played and recorded music. The only problem is, this Memphis band has very little place recognition. “We tried to play Minglewood a long time ago,” he recalls, “and the dude’s like ‘I’m sorry, we’ve gotta have a local band for this spot.’ I’ve been playing around here since 1993! And in Memphis band listings, most times, they don’t even spell the name right. But outta town, the name’s spelled right. It’s cool to say you’re from Memphis, but this is a fickle town.”

It’s ironic, because the family name is about as Memphis as you can get. Killingsworth’s father, Bobby Joe, was born in McNairy County and grew up playing rockabilly and country there, until he aimed for the big time and moved to Memphis in 1962. Not long after that, he joined rockabilly/country singer Eddie Bond’s band in a musical partnership that would last for decades. When Bond began hosting a variety show on WHBQ in 1966, his friend Bobby Joe was right there with him, taking on the nickname “Bo Jack” and a new comedic character to boot. The show was on the air for 10 years, and then another five when it was revived in the 1990s.

But Killingsworth the Younger had no taste for country music during most of those years, and invitations from his father to join the Bond band went unheeded. Later, the son grew to appreciate the genres of his father, and even drummed for Bond in the last years of his career. By that time, he was kicking himself for missing out. “Eddie Bond would tell me, ‘You could have met Ernest Tubb! He was on our show.'”

John Pickle

and Brian Costner

It was also country that gave Killingsworth his first break in the music business. Reluctant to trade on his father’s or Eddie Bond’s name, he created Joecephus and the George Jonestown Massacre as an umbrella group for the diverse music he preferred. Though he grew up on bands ranging from Black Flag to Bauhaus to Nazareth, his newfound love of country led to some radio play in the 2000s.

“I got a bad job review, so I wrote a song about my boss,” says Killingsworth. “That one little song, ‘Quittin Time,’ still gets maybe a couple thousand plays a week. I recorded it by just plugging a guitar and pedals right into the board, and I cringe whenever I hear it, but it outsells everything we’ve ever done. I just went off on my boss and everybody just started requesting it. Rock 103, the morning show, played it for about seven weeks in a row when it came out.”

Momentum grew for the Massacre, and most of the growth was out of town. “I’d search the internet and email any bigger bands playing within an eight-hour radius, to get on board opening for them. You can book one show with David Allan Coe or somebody like that, and then there’s automatically 700 or more people you’re playing for. Then you book your little shows around it.”

The band quickly built on two seemingly contradictory strengths: outlaw country and thrashing riff rock. This eclecticism has served them well. “With the Massacre thing, we’ve been able to play with everybody from Coe to George Lynch (of Dokken), Bad Brains, Johnny Winters, Jim Dickinson. A weird mix of people. We’ve got like 80 songs. We can make it fit into a set.”

The group has parlayed these diverse pairings into some equally diverse collaborations, especially on tribute albums that Killingsworth has masterminded. Perhaps the most popular has been a double LP tribute to Black Oak Arkansas, which blends contributions from the Massacre and original members of Black Oak (including Jim Dandy) with offerings from the likes of Jello Biafra (Dead Kennedys) and Greg Ginn (Black Flag). Killingsworth says it’s not surprising that such pioneers of punk appreciate the Arkansas rockers.

But nowadays, Killingsworth is most excited about the latest release by the Massacre, Death Rattle Shake. This new outing finds them in full riff rock mode, with crunching guitars underpinning Killingsworth’s deadpan vocals. It’s a sound that’s won fans throughout the region, and it’s keeping Joecephus mighty busy — even if, as he notes, “my dad still plays more than I do.”

Categories
Opinion The Last Word

Pelosi Has Got to Go

Dear Congressman Cohen,

The Democrats are practically salivating over their chances to retake the House and possibly the Senate in November, especially since the treasonous antics of this aberration of a president in Finland with his handler, Vlad the Impaler. However, there are still some major obstacles. I believe that among the reasons that so many people sat out the last election rather than vote for Hillary was their reluctance to return Bill Clinton to the White House. Similarly, I sense that the same voters who mistrusted the Clintons, do not want to see the speaker’s gavel returned to Nancy Pelosi.

You know me, Congressman. I have no special insights or inside sources to assist me in formulating an opinion. I’m like a Will Rogers for the electronic age. All I know is what I see, hear, and read from multi-platforms and trusted sources, so when I say the Democrats have problems, that’s just my perception of things, backed up with a generous knowledge of history and politics. I believe that this will be a generational election, much like 1960, when the torch was passed to JFK.
Former DNC Chairman Howard Dean said, “Nancy [Pelosi] is probably the greatest speaker since Tip O’Neill,” but, in the next breath, he said it was, “time for [his] generation to get the hell out of the way.” Pelosi has been in the party’s top spot for 15 years. That’s five years longer than Tip O’Neill. She has been a familiar face since she was elected to Congress in 1987, representing most of San Francisco. That was the same year Michael Jackson released “Bad” and the No. 1 movie was Dirty Dancing. As effective a leader as I believe Pelosi has been, I fear she has stayed too long at the ball.

We both know that a great deal of politics is perception. For instance, the Republicans are perceived as the Neo-Know Nothing Party, thoroughly corrupted and devoid of any social conscience, while the Democrats are perceived as either whimpering simps or simpering wimps who have allowed the word “liberal” to become a filthy epithet and have no true compass for the future of the nation. We also know that the Democrats could fuck up a mayonnaise sandwich and are entirely capable of doing it again.

People are clamoring for fresh voices and new leadership, but I only hear crickets from the Dems. The ages of the House Democratic leadership are respectively: Pelosi,78; Party Whip Steny Hoyer, 79; and Assistant Minority Leader Jim Clyburn, 78. I’m not sure if these are politicians or the cast of Cocoon.

During a brief discussion, you told me that Nancy Pelosi accomplished more in a day than others did in a month and that she had the energy of others “half her age.” Therein lies the problem. Representatives half her age should already be rising into positions of influence in the party. At least 20 current Democratic candidates have said they will not vote for Pelosi as speaker, causing the party leadership elections to be postponed until Thanksgiving. Matt Fuller of the Huffington Post wrote, “Pelosi was able to save face, delaying the elections herself instead of actually letting the group force her into moving the date.”

It’s not all about age. We know Nancy Pelosi as the first female Speaker in history, a champion of women’s rights, and perhaps the greatest fund-raiser in party history. She also blocked George Bush’s plan to privatize Social Security and helped shepherd Obamacare through Congress when others had given up. Conversely, after the Bush regime misled the American people about “weapons of mass destruction” and took the country into an unnecessary war, Pelosi said impeachment was “off the table.” Concerning Trump, Pelosi said that impeachment would be “a gift to the Republicans.” She concluded, “this is not the path [the Party] should go on.” 
Don’t talk about impeachment? I want that lying, ill-tempered, conniving, money-laundering, puffed-up Putin punk not just impeached but arrested and jailed. Our democracy is burning. If there were ever a time to discuss impeachment, it’s now. I don’t care if it motivates the Trump cultists, the Democrats’ job is to turn out more voters than they do. The Republicans are actively involved in their favorite activity; suppressing the vote. 

The right-wing perception of Nancy Pelosi is a blood-sucking San Fransisco liberal who wants to raise your taxes and give it all to MS-13 gang members and abortion clinics. The GOP spent $65 million on anti-Pelosi ads in 2010 and are gearing up to spend even more this time around. The Trumpsters need an enemy, and now that Hillary’s gone, Nancy Pelosi is the best they have. Republican ad men believe “her face on the screen stokes fear and anger.”

Since Nancy Pelosi took the gavel in 2007, Democrats have lost 39 House seats, yet she still claims impeachment is a “distraction.” Former CIA Chief John Brennan tweeted, “Donald Trump’s press conference performance in Helsinki rises to and exceeds the threshold of ‘high crimes and misdemeanors.’ It was nothing short of treasonous.” The Need to Impeach campaign of billionaire Tom Steyer has accumulated over 5.4 million signatures, 60 percent of which are “registered voters who don’t vote.” Steyer said, “We believe fighting against a reckless and lawless president is not something that will turn off voters. I have immense respect for Nancy Pelosi. … I love her, but I disagree with her on this.”

One representative has said, “The time has come to make clear to the American people and to this president that his train of injuries to our Constitution must be brought to an end through impeachment.” That was you, Congressman Cohen, and I respect and admire you for your courageous stance.

It is imperative that the Democrats succeed in washing the poison from the body politic in November. There are excellent chances this may happen but not while Pelosi’s amped-up, hysterical backbiters blame her for everything from the wildfires in California to trapping a Thai soccer team in an underwater cave. We should honor Nancy Pelosi’s long and brilliant service as party leader, but as near-President Al Gore once famously said, “It’s time for them to go.”  

Respectfully, your loyal Tennessee District 9 constituent.

Randy Haspel writes the “Recycled Hippies” blog.

Categories
Film Features Film/TV

Mama Mia! Here We Go Again

I poke my head into my wife’s office and ask if she’s still interested in going to Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again with me. No, sorry. She would, but she’s not as far along with her work as she thought she would be at this point. But it’s okay. I can go on without her.

It’s just an ABBA movie. 114 minutes of ABBA. I can do this.

I arrive at the theater and the pleasant girl behind the counter waves me in. They know me here. I arrive at my seat after the Chevy commercial, but before the trailers are done. Things are looking up! What do I remember about the first one? Meryl Streep’s got a daughter who wants to know who her dad is. Turns out it could be Pierce Brosnan, the handsome rich architect; Colin Firth, the handsome rich banker; or Stellan Skarsgård, the handsome rich sailor. Everybody sings a bunch of ABBA songs and decides nobody cares who the father is because the real father was the friends we made along the way.

The film begins, and I’m reminded that Meryl Streep’s daughter Sophie is played by Amanda Seyfried, whom I believe is secretly a Mark II Emma Stone android. She immediately starts singing ABBA a capella. I take a deep breath and remind myself I’m only here because I couldn’t stomach The Equalizer 2.

Here we go again — more ABBA, more Greece, and more singing in the sequel to Mamma Mia.

Sophie is sending out invites to a grand re-opening of Hotel Bella Donna, and also her mom Donna is dead. Apparently we couldn’t afford Meryl for the 10-years-after sequel.

But what’s this? A flashback to 1979! Donna’s a Dancing Disco queen and also valedictorian. It takes me a minute to figure out the connection, because young Donna is played by Lily James, who doesn’t in any way resemble Meryl. In lieu of a valedictorian speech, Donna sings “When I Kissed the Teacher,” which I have to admit is thematically appropriate. Just so happens that I stumbled across a marathon of Leonard Bernstein’s Omnibus on Turner Classic Movies last night, and watched an episode where the great composer takes a deep dive into the history of American musical comedy. The form originated in the late 1860s when a theater troupe and a minstrel group were both stranded in a town with one theater, so they took turns performing scenes and songs. People ate it up.

The guy who wrote West Side Story would have despised this movie. Bernstein said the key to a good musical is that the songs must advance the plot and illuminate emotions, creating artistic unity. In Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again, things just kind of happen to provide excuses to sing listlessly. These renditions are so flat and lifeless, they make the original versions sound raw and edgy. Even the subtitle, “Here We Go Again,” sounds drained of energy.

Everyone is very sad that Meryl is dead. I haven’t seen a production scramble to maintain its dignity after a losing its star since Charlton Heston played hardball with the producers of Beneath the Planet of the Apes. But they got the last laugh. He showed up at the end.

Did I mention the Hotel Bella Donna is on an island “at the far end of Greece”? That’s how Young Donna describes it as she sets out from Paris on her postgraduate transcontinental insemination spree. The first guy she meets is Young Colin Firth (Hugh Skinner). You can tell he’s a punk because he shops at Hot Topic in 1979. The Busby Berkeley-inspired production number of “Waterloo” he and Allen perform with a horde of French waiters dressed as Napoleon is pretty much the high point of the picture. Then it’s on to the ocean, where Donna ends up with Young Stellan Skarsgård, (Josh Dylan), on board his yacht The Panty Dropper. At least I think that’s what it’s called. I dozed off for a while. Finally, she meets Young Pierce Brosnan (Jeremy Irvine), and they cohabitate in a rustic farmhouse. In the barn is a powerful black stallion—which is in no way a sexual symbol—that Donna must tame.

The blonde guy’s obviously the father, by the way.

What’s weird is, in the ABBA Universe, the Greek economic crisis of 2009 still happened. And Cher is there, but she looks like Lady Gaga, and is absolutely murdering “Fernando.” Then, just as the film goes full Beneath the Planet of the Apes, it hits me: Donald Trump is not president in the ABBA universe. That’s why everything seems so aggressively pleasant.

This Greek island seems nice. I want to go there.

Categories
Food & Wine Food & Drink

The wonders of the cucumber.

CREDIT: Anna Sedneva | Dreamstime.com

It’s no surprise cucumbers are considered a physiologically “cooling” food in the Aryurvedic medical philosophy of India, where the plant is thought to have first been cultivated. One sure-fire way to be cooled by a cucumber is to cool your cucumbers first. With all due respect to the quenching you can get from a warm cucumber in the middle of a hot, dry field, there isn’t a finer thing to do than stand in the sun and eat a crispy, juicy cucumber straight out of the fridge.

Pharmacological researchers have zeroed in on several chemical compounds found in cucumbers for their potential medical benefits. Many of these are found in cucumber seed extract, but interesting compounds have been isolated from the peels as well. And from the blossom end of the cucumber, also known as the bitter end, Cucurbitacin C has emerged as a molecule of interest.

It’s the very bitter flavor you sometimes taste at one end of the cucumber. The blossom end is a toxin created by the plant to ward off predators like spider mites.

Chemically, Cucurbitacin C is a steroid molecule (though it isn’t currently banned by any sports leagues, so it must not be much good in that department). Nobody has gotten sick from too many cucumbers, but there have been cases of toxicity resulting from bitter melon, a relative of cucumber, and from eating unintended hybrid cucumbers, zucchini, squash, melon, or other members of the same family.

Meanwhile, Cucurbitacin C is under investigation for potential pharmacological benefits and is showing promise in many arenas, including anti-tumor, anti-diabetic, anti-atherosclerotic, and anti-inflammatory activity.

The cosmetics industry has latched onto several molecules in cucumber seeds, promoting their ability to hydrate, elasticize, and, you guessed it, cool and calm the skin.

Now is peak cucumber appreciation season at the farmers market. Last week I brought home five different varieties from three different vendors and let the comparisons begin. The highlight was the Chinese Cucumbers, sold to me by the Russian babushkas in an uncharacteristic show of diversity; usually they sell the same gherkin pickling cukes that all the other Russians sell. The Chinese Cucumbers have thin, spikey skins like pickling cukes, a sharp crisp, and explosive water content.

And don’t let the title “pickling” fool you when you want to eat a fresh cucumber. My wife (the vegetable whisperer) prefers pickling cucumbers to slicing cucumbers, at least for raw use. For what it’s worth, I agree.

If pickles are on your agenda, however, you should stick to actual pickling cucumbers. I’ve never seen anybody pull off a decent pickle with slicers.

Another great cucumber is the Armenian, which is as delicious as it is enormous. And some of the plain-Jane-looking normal slicing cucumbers these days can surprise you.

As for preparation, there are all kinds of lovely recipes for fresh cucumbers, but if your goal is to compare and contrast, munching them straight out of the fridge is the way to go. It’s also a very enjoyable and refreshing thing to do.

But if that’s too much chewing, I suggest putting your cukes in a high-speed blender with some ice cubes and whipping up some cucumber ambrosia.

Anna Sedneva | Dreamstime.com

Cucumber Ambrosia

2 medium cukes

4-8 cubes

1/4 lime

4 mint leaves

Slice the blossom ends of both cucumbers. If you can’t tell which end is which, slice them both off and nibble each end. Then you will know. If you want to remove any bitterness from the rest of the cucumber, then rub the cut face of the bitter end against the cut face of the cucumber. Rub in a circular pattern, which will extract a bitter, milky substance that you can wipe off. Cut the remaining cucumber sections into three or four pieces each and put them in the blender with the ice cubes and lime juice.

Blend, starting low until it’s a chunky slurry, then turn the blender up to high. If it’s too slushy for your taste, add water. If it’s too bitter, add sweetener, or fruit, and blend again.

Sipping on this milky, foamy treat is refreshing and satisfying on so many levels and is a delightful way to pass the afternoon, while loading up on vitamins and fiber. And, depending on the hour, these flavors go very well with gin. I can slip about half a shot into a glass of cucumber smoothie and barely taste a thing. And if I turn it up from there, the gin flavor creates a lovely cocktail.

Intoxication and toxicity are complex phenomena that are often dependent on the dosage. One can do worse than explore these realms with cucumber in hand, and mouth.