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R.I.P

The paid memorial section in Monday’s Commercial Appeal contained an obituary so Dickensian and curious that we feel compelled to mention it here. To the family of the successful heavy-equipment salesman Mr. Clement E. “Clem” Klank, whose parents were immigrants of Lithuanian extraction, we extend our deepest sympathies, even as we relate this wonderfully odd selection from his obituary. After Clem and his four siblings were orphaned, it seems there was some confusion as to the proper spelling of their last name, which, according to the obit, was generally thought to be Klunkus. One set of siblings took the name Klink. Clem and a younger brother took Klank, while their uncle Frank adopted the name Klunk (not Klank, as you might expect). According to the obit, “Clem always asserted that this was the origin of the phrase ‘klink, klank, klunk.'”