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News of the Weird: Week of 05/18/23

Recent Alarming Headline

KOKH-TV reported that on March 12, a woman in Dickson, Oklahoma, was attacked by her neighbor’s pet monkey, Jack, resulting in her ear being ripped “almost completely off my head,” the victim, Brittany Parker, said. “He started grabbing handfuls of my hair and just ripped it out,” she added. Dickson police were called, and as they looked for the monkey, two shots were fired. “The shots came from the area of the victim’s residence. Officers went back to the house and found that a family member of the victim shot and killed the primate,” police said. Parker said she will need plastic surgery to fix her ear. P.J. Carter, Jack’s owner, is distraught: “I lost my best friend and pet due to it all,” he said. “He was my super monkey. I feel sorry for [Parker] and her injury. My friend and pet Jack lost his life over a massive misunderstanding and the lack of knowledge and education with an exotic animal,” Carter added. The district attorney has declined to file charges. [KOKH, 3/17/2023]

Creme de la Weird

The Mondaiji Con Cafe Daku (loosely translated: Problem Child Concept Cafe) in Sapporo, Japan, was forced to fire one of its waitresses in April after she was discovered to be adding her own blood to cocktails, the Daily Mail reported. The cafe owner called her actions “absolutely not acceptable” and said the establishment would close while every drinking glass was replaced. “We will hire a contractor to clean the store, change glasses, and dispose of alcoholic beverages that may have been contaminated,” he said. He called her actions “part-time job terrorism.” A local doctor said anyone who had patronized the cafe should visit a doctor and have a blood test. [Daily Mail, 4/13/2023]

It’s a Mystery

Over the last several months, Don Powell and his wife, Nancy, have been puzzling over uninvited inhabitants of their fancy mailbox in Orchard Lake, Michigan. USA Today reported that in August 2022, two small dolls, a miniature couch, and a small table appeared in the mailbox, which is custom-built to resemble the Powells’ home, with windows and a solar-powered interior light that comes on at night. The dolls were accompanied by a note: “We’ve decided to live here. Mary and Shelley.” Powell thought a neighbor might be spoofing him, but after exhaustive investigatory work, he’s no closer to knowing the source of the figures. Over time, the home gained a four-poster bed, a dog, a rug, and art for the wall. “The whole thing got rather whimsical,” Powell said. At Halloween, Mary and Shelley were replaced by two skeleton dolls dressed in black, and at Christmas, tiny, wrapped gifts appeared. Now, Powell is thinking of writing a children’s book about the mailbox mystery. “I think it creates a novel story,” he said. [USA Today, 4/13/2023]

The Continuing Crisis

Angel Footman, 23, a teacher at Griffin Middle School in Tallahassee, Florida, was arrested on April 7 and charged with contributing to the delinquency of a minor, the New York Post reported. The charges came after school administrators learned Footman was allegedly hosting violent brawls between students in her classroom. Naturally, she set down rules: no recordings, and no pulling hair. No screaming (draws attention). Fights must be limited to 30 seconds each. However, several sixth-grade girls alerted administrators, and video turned up showing Footman at her desk while students fought each other. She’s scheduled for arraignment in May. [NY Post, 4/10/2023]

Bright Idea

Drivers along Interstate 5 near Eugene, Oregon, were startled on April 11 to see $100 bills floating through the air, Fox News reported. In fact, many cars stopped along the highway to grab the loot. When the Oregon State Police tracked down the source, it was Colin Davis McCarthy, who told them he’d been throwing the money out of his car to “bless others.” He said he thought he’d dispersed around $200,000. The OSP later revealed that McCarthy’s family had been in touch; he had depleted a shared family bank account for his Robin Hood moment. [Fox News, 4/14/2023]

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News of the Weird: Week of 05/11/23

Least Competent Criminals

• Nothing went right for a carjacker in East Memphis, Tennessee, on March 10, WREG-TV reported. An unnamed 22-year-old victim pulled into his own driveway that night, only to have a man yank the driver’s door open and point a gun at him. He asked for the victim’s wallet and keys to the 2006 Honda Element, then tried to back out of the driveway, but as he did so, he rolled down the window. That’s when the victim noticed the thief’s gun didn’t have a barrel, so he reached in and punched the carjacker in the face, causing the car to clip the side of the house and run into a pole. The carjacker jumped out and ran away; police were able to gather prints from the car and a recovered phone, but no arrests have been made. [WREG, 3/13/2023]

• As authorities in Gainesville, Georgia, searched the home of 75-year-old Alan Neil Thur on March 14 after receiving a tip that Thur had child pornography on his computer, Thur sat at his computer … “viewing five images of child pornography,” Hall County Sheriff’s deputies wrote in a report. WSB-TV reported that Thur was charged with seven counts of sexual exploitation of a minor and booked into the county jail. [WSB, 3/16/2023]

Oh, Canada

Fans of our favorite rude gesture, rejoice! Flipping the bird is a protected, “God-given” right in Canada, NPR reported, after Judge Dennis Galiatsatos ruled on Feb. 24 that “offending someone is not a crime.” The decision stemmed from a court case between two unneighborly neighbors in a Montreal suburb. “The complainants are free to clutch their pearls in the face of such an insult,” Galiatsatos said. “However, the police department and the 911 dispatching service have more important priorities to address.” [NPR, 3/10/2023]

Suspicions Confirmed

On March 20, police officers were called to a home in Mill Creek, Washington, on a report of items stolen from the house, Fox13-TV reported. As they investigated, they discovered someone was living in the home’s upstairs loft — with a bed, drug paraphernalia, and half-eaten food. The oblivious homeowners did say they had noticed the smell of cigarette smoke. Police suggested the homeowners wait until the person returned, and it didn’t take long: On March 21, they arrested Daniel Tomoiaga, 24. In his possession, they found the stolen items, along with meth and fentanyl. No word on how long he’d been staying at the home. [Fox13, 3/23/2023]

The Tech Revolution

Artificial intelligence has infiltrated television news in China, Oddity Central reported. Ren Xiaorong, a virtual news anchor, was introduced on March 12 to viewers of People’s Daily. “For 365 days, 24 hours, I will be reporting the news for the whole year, round the clock, without rest,” (Redundant) Ren told viewers. “Whether at news sites or back in the studio, you will always see me.” She has absorbed the talents of “thousands of news anchors” and will continue to evolve based on feedback. Ren can answer many questions, but her answers are all within the parameters of the Chinese Communist Party’s rhetoric. [Oddity Central, 3/17/2023]

Clothing Optional

In the early 2000s, Joseph DeRuvo Jr. of Norwalk, Connecticut, had developed painful bunions on his feet, and his doctor suggested surgery to remove them, The New York Times reported. While awaiting his operation, he started going barefoot, and he soon realized his feet felt much better. “The tactile feedback just kind of makes everything else going on feel a little bit smoother,” he said. Now 59 years old, DeRuvo has been barefoot for two decades, and he says navigating weather and terrain is easier than navigating people. He is sometimes asked to leave a business and on occasion, he fights back. “If I’m feeling feisty,” he said. His wife added, “We get thrown out of a lot of places.” But his shoelessness contributes to a mindful life: “I pay attention to every single step I take,” DeRuvo said. [New York Times, 3/7/2023]

News of the Weird is now a podcast on all major platforms! To find out more, visit newsoftheweirdpodcast.com.

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News of the Weird: Week of 04/27/23

Irony
Your Mates Brewing Co. has recalled cans of its Watermelon Sour Beer because of “excess alcohol,” United Press International reported. The Australian brand said the beer could pose a risk of illness; it was unintentionally fermented twice, causing it to have a higher alcohol content and carbonation. The brand is sold in Queensland and online Down Under. [UPI, 3/7/2023]

Police Reports
• Belinda H. Miller, 50, was in jail four days after a Feb. 18 incident at a Popeyes restaurant in Richmond County, Georgia, WJBF-TV reported. Miller became angry when her order was missing biscuits, the store’s manager told police, and the mistake was corrected — but that didn’t appease her. Instead, she allegedly drove her SUV into the store’s front window, narrowly missing a worker standing inside. She continued driving until debris inside the building stopped her car. Miller was charged with aggravated assault and criminal damage to property. [WJBF, 2/23/2023]

• Hayato Baba, 21, of Narashino, Japan, was taken into custody in March because he allegedly assaulted another man and stole his wallet outside a convenience store, Japan Today reported — all because the guy was taking too long in the restroom. Baba admitted to punching the victim twice in the face and taking the wallet. [Japan Today, 2/19/2023]

Creme de la Weird
Already this year, representatives of a fictional country called the United States of Kailasa have participated in two meetings at the United Nations, Oddity Central reported. Founded by Indian fugitive and “supreme pontiff of Hinduism” Nithyananda Paramashivam, the virtual nation claims to be a sovereign state for Hindus who have been “persecuted for over a decade.” In January, Kailasa suggested it had been officially recognized by the United States of America through a sister-city agreement with Newark, New Jersey, but U.S. authorities later rescinded the arrangement. A U.N. representative explained the country’s access by saying the meetings are open to the public. [Oddity Central, 3/13/2023]

Awesome!
How did your bracket hold up? If it busted, here’s some other basketball news that might cheer you up. Sporting goods company Wilson is reinventing the basketball, Oddity Central reported on March 13, with a new prototype that doesn’t require inflation. The Wilson Airless Prototype uses a “research-grade” polymer material to achieve the necessary bounce; the surface is a lattice design that keeps the traditional binding pattern so players can grip the seams of the ball more easily. There are still kinks to work out, including how to manage small objects that can get inside the ball. [Oddity Central, 3/13/2023]

Florida
A flamboyant woman named Ashley Cream went before the Boca Raton Planning and Zoning Board on March 2 with a pressing concern: She suggested that March 10 should be designated Sugar Daddy and Mommy Appreciation Day. WFLA-TV reported that Cream, accompanied by an elderly man in a wheelchair, started her appeal by telling board members they were “looking absolutely fabulous, a little bit serious.” She went on to say that sugar daddies and mommies are “responsible for college educations, cars, homes, rents, jets, Birkin [bags], and the occasional body enhancement” — though she claimed to be “all natural” as she gestured toward her chest. Councilman Arnold Sevell replied that her idea is “a city council issue,” and she and her companion left the meeting. [WFLA, 3/10/2023]

Update
News of the Weird reported in July 2022 that Dean Mayhew of Sussex, England, had his Tesco grocery loyalty card QR code tattooed on his arm. While Mayhew claims he has “no regrets” about the body art, Metro News reported on March 14 that after eight months, he’s saved only 18 British pounds’ worth of points. His goal is to save enough by the end of the year to pay for his Christmas food. “Sometimes when I go in there, the cashier doesn’t believe it’s real — I have to tell them, ‘Just scan it, please!’ and they’re shocked,” he said. “I love the tattoo so much.” [Metro News, 3/14/2023]

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News of the Weird: Week of 04/13/23

Awesome!

Kansans take their tornado sirens seriously, so it was no surprise that on March 4 in the Wichita suburb of Park City, a ribbon-cutting ceremony took place to mark the reinstallation of the city’s oldest Thunderbolt siren, KSNW-TV reported. The sirens are remnants of the Cold War, and four of them are still in service in Sedgwick County. “About a year ago, we took them down, had them refurbished, and put them back up in our system,” explained Jonathan Marr, deputy director for Sedgwick County Emergency Management. The feted siren had been in use for 70 years. [KSNW, 3/6/2023]

It’s Come to This

Tattoo artist Dean Gunther of Manchester, United Kingdom, has made one man’s body goals come true: He’s inked a ripped six-pack on the man’s torso, freeing the man from eating right and exercising more, the Daily Mail reported on March 6. “He decided that by getting a six-pack tattoo, he will always look summer-ready while still being able to enjoy beer and good food,” Gunther said of his customer. The artistic tat took two days to complete. [Daily Mail, 3/6/2023]

Compelling Explanation

At a preliminary hearing in San Francisco Superior Court on March 6, police officers offered testimony about a Feb. 1 incident in which Dmitri Mishin fired a replica gun inside a synagogue, The San Francisco Standard reported. As officers interrogated Mishin, he explained that the shooting was an act of prayer he was giving for his neighbor’s bird. Mishin, who pleaded not guilty, told officers he lives on a submarine and talks with North Korean and Japanese leaders, and that weapons found in his home were movie props. After the shooting at the synagogue, he waved goodbye and left. Unsurprisingly, this isn’t Mishin’s first run-in with the law; his mother testified that he suffers from mental illness. The hearing was ongoing. [SF Standard, 3/6/2023]

Pick on Somebody Your Own Size

David Jimenez, 65, of Maui, Hawaii, was arrested on March 6 for “pursuing a humpback whale,” CBS News reported. Jimenez, who calls himself Dolphin Dave, was allegedly harassing the whale and dolphins in Kealakekua Bay State Historical Park, where he was snorkeling. Jimenez was unrepentant, though: He told officers “he’s not going to stop swimming with whales and dolphins ‘because it’s magical and others do much worse things.’” Humpback whales are protected under the National Marine Sanctuaries Act. [CBS News, 3/7/2023]

Bright Idea

In China, women modeling lingerie for online retailers violates the country’s rules about spreading obscene material, Insider reported on March 1. Instead, underwear companies are hiring men to model the clothing — and it’s working out better than you might think. “The guy wears it better than the girl,” one online commenter posted. Others argue that the restrictions are “depriving women of job opportunities.” “We don’t really have a choice,” said one business owner, Mr. Xu. “The designs can’t be modeled by our female colleagues, so we will use our male colleagues to model it.” [Insider, 3/1/2023]

It’s Good to Have a Hobby

You missed it again. Key West’s annual Conch Shell Blowing Contest took place on March 4, with Carol Whiteley of Ontario, Canada, winning the women’s division and Brian Cardis of Macon, Georgia, taking the men’s top prize. Entrants of all ages were judged on quality, novelty, duration, and loudness, the Associated Press reported. Michael and Georgann Wachter from Avon Lake, Ohio, impressed the audience with a shell and vocal duet of Elvis Presley’s “Hound Dog.” Whiteley said she toots her shell to celebrate sunsets at her riverside home. Time to start practicing for next year! [AP, 3/4/2023]

Send your weird news items with subject line WEIRD NEWS to WeirdNewsTips@amuniversal.com. News of the Weird is now a podcast on all major platforms! Visit newsoftheweirdpodcast.com to find out more.

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News of the Weird: Week of 04/06/23

Size Matters

Momo the lar gibbon, who lives at the Kujukushima Zoo and Botanical Garden Mori Kirara in Nagasaki Prefecture, Japan, delivered a baby in February 2021, which surprised zookeepers, since Momo lived in her own enclosure with no males around. She was very protective of the offspring, United Press International reported, so it wasn’t until two years later that handlers were able to collect DNA from the youngster to determine who the father was. As it turned out, a 34-year-old agile gibbon, Itou, was the baby daddy. Zookeepers found that a partition between Momo’s exhibit and Itou’s off-display area had a perforated board with holes about 9 mm in diameter, and they believe the two were able to mate through one of those holes. The perforated board was replaced with a steel plate, but Momo and Itou will be introduced properly to each other so that they may live as a family. [UPI, 2/3/2023]

Great Art!

Marcelo “B-boy” De Souza Ribeiro of Sao Paolo, Brazil, is known as the most modified man in the world, with 1,500 tattoos covering his skin and now, a new transformation: a “devil hand.” The Daily Star reported that Ribeiro did a lot of research before undergoing the procedure, which split his hand between the middle and ring fingers. “I began to see the possibility of making an opening … through the middle where you can have opening and closing movements and a firmer folding of the hand,” he said. Over the years, he’s spent about $35,000 on his modifications, which also include a split tongue. Ribeiro said he thinks of his body as an “art exhibition.” [The Daily Star, 2/9/2023]

Wait, What?

The Exmoor Squirrel Project, a conservation endeavor in the United Kingdom aimed at saving the native red squirrel, has proposed that people set live traps for the non-native grey squirrel and that restaurants serve its meat, the BBC reported on Feb. 28. “Our woodlands, landscape, and the biodiversity isn’t set up to deal with the behaviors of the grey,” said the group’s manager Kerry Hosegood. “We’re going to introduce them to restaurants in the Exmoor area because they actually make for good eating,” she added. “This isn’t something that we like to do … just target greys. … It’s a very serious project.” She said the grey squirrels have caused about 40 million pounds’ worth of damage to trees annually. [BBC, 2/28/2023]

Suspicions Confirmed

Madison County (Illinois) coroner Steve Nonn solved a nearly year-old mystery on March 2 when he released the results of an autopsy on Richard Maedge of Troy, Illinois. Maedge’s wife, Jennifer, had reported him missing in late April last year after he failed to come home from work, KTVI-TV reported. His car, wallet, and keys were at the house, but she couldn’t find him. Police searched the house, which they described as a “hoarder home,” but did not locate him. In fact, they searched twice, as Jennifer was also looking for the source of a “sewerlike” odor in the dwelling. Finally, on Dec. 11, as Jennifer pulled out Christmas decorations from a concealed storage space, she discovered Richard’s mummified body. The coroner ruled that Maedge hanged himself and that there was no foul play in his death. [KTVI, 3/6/2023]

News You Can Use

Mushrooms have been in the news a lot lately, but you probably didn’t know that Texas has a state mushroom: the Devil’s Cigar or Texas Star. KXAN-TV reported that the Lone Star State’s designated fungus is ultra-rare, growing only on decomposing cedar elm or oak tree stumps and roots in the U.S. and Japan. It comes out of the earth in a cylindrical shape, then “will open up into a three- to eight-pointed star,” said Angel Schatz of the Central Texas Mycological Society. That’s when it releases its spores and sometimes hisses. “It is a very cool mushroom to have as our state mushroom,” Schatz said. [KXAN, 3/7/2023]

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News of the Weird: Week of 03/30/23

Least Competent Criminal

Early on the morning of Feb. 5, 20-year-old Lantz Kurtz broke into a gas station in Palm Coast, Florida, and stole multiple items. He exited via the front door, apparently unaware that he’d left a big clue behind: his debit card, Fox35-TV reported. Officers responding to the alarm found the card and tracked down Kurtz, who told them he had intended to come back to the store and pay for the items. But Sheriff Rick Staly wasn’t having it: “Leaving a debit card behind does not absolve you from theft or committing a burglary,” he said. [Fox35, 2/8/2023]

Crime Spree

Robert Powers, 37, managed to terrorize multiple citizens of Altoona, Pennsylvania, on Feb. 6, WTAJ-TV reported. He allegedly broke into four different homes, telling one woman as he covered her mouth, “I’m Batman.” At the next home, he choked a man, went through his pockets, and held him hostage with a pocketknife. Next, he turned the man’s gas stove on and forced him into his truck, heading across town at speeds of more than 100 mph before crashing into a Jeep. Powers then kicked open the door of a nearby home and repeatedly asked, “Why’d you do this, mom?” as he walked through the residence. Finally, at the last crime scene, police were able to subdue Powers, who admitted he may have ingested meth or bath salts. [WTAJ, 2/7/2023]

Bright Idea

Jose Ruben Nava, former director of the zoo in Chilpancingo, Mexico, is under fire after officials learned that he slaughtered four pygmy goats to serve at the zoo’s year-end dinner, MSN reported. Fernando Ruiz Gutierrez, director of wildlife for the state’s environment department, said serving the goat meat “put the health of the people who ate them at risk because these animals were not fit for human consumption.” Nava is also accused of trading a zebra for tools. He was let go from his position in January after the death of a deer at the zoo. [MSN, 2/2/2023]

Irony

A 61-year-old butcher working at the Sheung Shui Slaughterhouse in Hong Kong died at the hands — er, hooves — of a pig he was trying to slaughter on Jan. 20, CNN reported. The unnamed man was knocked to the ground by the struggling pig, which had revived after a shot from a stun gun, and suffered a wound from a meat cleaver. Strangely, police said, the man’s wounds were to his hand and foot; a cause of death had not been released. The Labour Department extended its “deepest sympathy to his family.” [CNN, 1/21/2023]

Animal Antics

The Wyandotte (Michigan) Police Department opened an investigation in January after an officer was suspected of stealing another officer’s lunch while he was out of the room. The Today show reported that Officer Barwig was called away from the break room to assist in the jail; when he returned, K-9 Officer Ice was seen licking his chops, and Barwig’s sandwich was nowhere to be seen. “Officer Ice has invoked his Fifth Amendment right to remain silent and quite frankly is not cooperating with the investigation,” the department posted on its Facebook page. Later, dozens of attorneys offered to represent Ice in court, but the department decided not to pursue discipline or criminal charges. [Today, 1/23/2023]

Can’t Possibly Be True

Jesse and Deedee O’Dell of Tulsa, Oklahoma, normally spend around $10 for their Starbucks coffees, but on Jan. 7, their bill was considerably more, KOKI-TV reported. A few days later, when Deedee tried to use the same card at a mall, it was declined. That’s when the couple discovered that Starbucks had given itself a $4,444.44 tip on their $10.90 bill. They contacted the district manager, who said there’d been an “issue” with the network, and they received two checks to cover the enormous gratuity — but both checks bounced. While they wait for replacement checks, they’ve had to cancel a family vacation, “and the tickets are nonrefundable,” said Jesse. A Starbucks representative said new checks are on the way and the mistake was caused by “possible human error.” [KOKI, 2/7/2023]

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News of the Weird: Week of 03/23/23

Police Report

Murphy the ape statue was an “icon” at Design Emporium and Antiques in Kensington, Maryland — until he was stolen in the wee hours of Jan. 4, the New York Post reported. Murphy, made of cast iron and weighing 200 pounds, was hurriedly loaded into the bed of an “older model Chevrolet Colorado Z71,” authorities said, as seen on a surveillance video. The suspect “pulled right up and had the bolt cutters ready” to cut the cable securing the sculpture. Shop owner Kristina Jamgochian said people would take selfies with Murphy. “It’s my business and I feel violated,” she said. A $10,000 reward awaits anyone who helps recover the gorilla. [New York Post, 1/31/2023]

Oops!

A 66-year-old female patient at the Glen Oaks Alzheimer’s Special Care Center in Urbandale, Iowa, had suffered a slow decline and was moved into hospice care in late December. On Jan. 3, CBS News reported, the woman was pronounced dead, and the funeral home was called. She was placed in a body bag and transported to the Ankeny Funeral Home & Crematory, where workers unzipped the bag and got a shock: They “observed [the resident’s] chest moving and she gasped for air,” a report from the Iowa Department of Inspections and Appeals detailed. Responding EMS workers were able to get a pulse and monitor breathing, but she had no eye movement or verbal response. She was returned to the care facility, where she died two days later with her family at her side. The home is facing $10,000 in fines. [CBS News, 2/2/2023]

New York City recently unveiled the Long Island Railroad’s new Grand Central Madison terminal, which was built to the tune of $11 billion. But, NBC New York reported on Feb. 1, the new facility is marred by a spelling mistake — etched in stone. A carved quote from artist Georgia O’Keeffe sports a misspelling of her name, with only one F. “We clearly F-ed this one up and it’s being fixed,” said MTA communications director Tim Minton. However, he couldn’t say when the edit would be complete. [NBC New York, 2/1/2023]

Wait, What?

A couple in Etobicoke, Toronto, left on an extended business trip in January 2022, CTV News reported. When they returned home months later, they were stunned to realize that their house had been sold and the new owners had moved in. Police said a man and woman impersonated the owners, hired a real estate agent, and listed the property using fake identification. Police are still looking for the imposters. [CTV News, 1/5/2023]

That Rule Doesn’t Apply to Me

On Jan. 16, Brazilian attorney Leandro Mathias de Novaes delivered his mother to the Laboratório Cura in Sao Paulo, where she was scheduled for an MRI. Before they both entered the MRI room, the New York Post reported, they were asked to remove any metal objects from their persons and signed a form detailing the protocols, but Novaes opted to not remove, or disclose, his concealed weapon. When the MRI’s magnetic field yanked the pistol from his waistband, it fired and struck him in the stomach; he was hospitalized for three weeks after the incident but died on Feb. 6. [New York Post, 2/9/2023]

Clothing Optional

Trevyn Wayne Hill, 21, of Las Vegas, let it all hang out on Jan. 28 when he approached another guest in a stairwell at the Des Moines (Iowa) Downtown Marriott, KCCI-TV reported. Court documents said Hill was naked and brandishing a toilet plunger when he yelled, “I’m going to [expletive] get you,” while chasing the other person. Hill cruised around the hotel in his birthday suit, destroying a sprinkler system and pulling several fire alarms before finally being subdued by firefighters. Hill pleaded not guilty to assault, first-degree criminal mischief, and disorderly conduct. [KCCI, 2/3/2023]

Send your weird news items with subject line WEIRD NEWS to WeirdNewsTips@amuniversal.com. News of the Weird is now a podcast on all major platforms! Visit newsoftheweirdpodcast.com to find out more.

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Reprinted with permission.
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News of the Weird: Week of 03/16/23

Awesome!

Jean Merritt of Philadelphia has a special knack for spreading goodwill. She writes letters. According to Philadelphia magazine, Merritt solicits mailing addresses and then responds with a handwritten (“in meticulous cursive”) letter on captivating stationery. Her missive to reporter Victor Fiorillo mentioned that she has an overabundance of writing papers and postcards. “I’ve been writing letters since I was a little girl, and never stopped,” Merritt said. Along with requested letters, she writes to people in nursing homes through Letters Against Isolation and to people in prisons. “My mother collected stationery, and I’m still using the stationery I found in her house when she died in 2011. … I see stationery on clearance, and I can’t resist it.” Sadly, she said most people don’t write her back. But, she noted, “Doing this is also just really good for my brain.” [Philadelphia magazine, 2/2/2023]

Suspicions Confirmed

Varsity basketball coach Jahmal Street and assistant coach Arlisha Boykins were fired from their positions at Churchland High School in Portsmouth, Virginia, after Boykins, 22, came off the bench as a sub in a Jan. 21 girls’ JV game, The Washington Post reported. The girl who was unavailable for the game was 13 years old. As a result of the incident, the team’s remaining games were canceled. Churchland investigated and held meetings with players and parents. “Coaches always preach to kids about integrity … so I was just shocked,” the father of the absent player said. He said his daughter will not attend Churchland next year. [Washington Post, 2/1/2023]

Unclear on the Concept

Musa Hasahya Kasera, 68, has a problem, but he admits it stems from his own irresponsibility, Yahoo! News reported. The eastern Ugandan man has 12 wives, 102 children, and 578 grandchildren. “At first it was a joke,” he said, “but now this has its problems. … Two of my wives left because I could not afford the basics like food, education, clothing.” Most of the family live in a house with a rusting corrugated iron roof on a mere two acres of land. “I can only remember the name of my first and the last born, but some of the children, I can’t recall their names,” Kasera lamented. Now his wives are using contraception; “I have learnt from my irresponsible act of producing so many children that I can’t look after,” he said. Horse, meet barn door. [Yahoo! News, 2/2/2023]

Americans Abroad

American animal rights activist Alicia Day, 34, was arrested in Moscow, Russia, on Feb. 1, according to Reuters, after she paraded a calf through Red Square, shouting, “Animals are not food!” In a Russian court, she was fined 20,000 rubles ($285) and sentenced to 13 days of “administrative arrest.” Although Day is in Russia on a tourist visa, she explained in court that she had a driver bring the calf to Red Square, so she could “show it a beautiful place in our beautiful country.” [Reuters, 2/1/2023]

A 34-year-old California man was arrested in Florence, Italy, on Jan. 26 after he drove his rented Fiat onto the Ponte Vecchio, a stone bridge dating from 1345 that spans the Arno River and is now a pedestrian walkway and shopping destination. SFGATE reported that the unnamed driver told police he couldn’t find parking and didn’t realize he was on the historic bridge. He was fined about 500 euros. [SFGATE, 1/31/2023]

Awwwwww

The Rhode Island Department of Health played along with the Cumberland, Rhode Island, police department after it received a request from a little girl for DNA testing on a partially eaten cookie and some gnawed-on carrot sticks, the Associated Press reported. She was hoping for a conclusive match for Santa Claus, but alas, the department said it was unable to “definitively confirm or refute the presence of Santa” in her home. However, it did find DNA closely matching Rangifer tarandus, or reindeer, on the carrots. [AP, 1/24/2023]

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Reprinted with permission.
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Fun Stuff News of the Weird

News of the Weird: Week of 03/09/23

New World Order

Sure, your fancy SUV may have ventilated seats and Wi-Fi, but does it have electrified door handles? The Guardian reported on Jan. 25 that a new vehicle has hit the market targeted at the particularly fearful driver — the Rezvani Vengeance. Costing up to $499,000, the Vengeance has bulletproof glass, strobe lights, wing mirrors that emit pepper spray, and no back windshield — instead, the driver can monitor a live video stream of what’s going on behind the car. Sure to win you a popularity contest in the pickup lane at your kid’s school, the Vengeance also has a loudspeaker so you can call to little Timmy without leaving the safety of your seat. Extras include bulletproof vests, helmets, and gas masks. The Irvine, California, company teases potential buyers on the website: “Vengeance is yours.” Wow. [Guardian, 1/25/2023]

Clothing Optional

Brittney Marie Reynolds, 35, entered St. Mary’s Cathedral in chilly Fargo, North Dakota, on Jan. 24 and was seen on security camera footage knocking over a potted plant, then approaching a large statue of Jesus on the wall, according to KMOV-TV. She ripped the statue from the wall and threw it to the floor, then headed back out — all while topless and shoeless, in temps under 20 degrees. Rev. Riley Durkin called police, who caught up with Reynolds as she bolted across the street. Officers noted that she wasn’t able to answer questions and appeared to be under the influence of a substance. [KMOV, 1/25/2023]

Meanwhile, in willful disobedience of every mother’s “wear clean underwear” edict, Timothy O’Rourke of Danville, New Hampshire, crashed his car on Jan. 25 and ran from the scene, wearing nary a stitch of clothing. WHDH-TV reported that officers found O’Rourke “running behind Main Street homes wearing no clothes and coated in his own blood.” He was charged with DWI and resisting arrest, and presumably given some jail garb to wear. [WHDH, 1/25/2023]

Awesome!

Vanyar, one of the equine competitors in the Tokay Stakes race on Jan. 22 in Nagoya, Japan, crossed the finish line first. However, Oddity Central reported, Vanyar was missing one thing, which led to his being disqualified: a rider. Vanyar’s jockey fell off as soon as they left the gate, and the second-place horse’s jockey couldn’t catch up to the riderless horse (although they were the technical winners). After crossing the finish line, Vanyar coolly slowed down and sauntered off toward the exit. [Oddity Central, 1/24/2023]

Special Delivery

During a basketball match between Duquesne University and Loyola Chicago in Pittsburgh on Jan. 25, officials briefly stopped play at the 16:10 mark of the second half, TribLive reported. At that moment, a man in a yellow hoodie walked onto the court and approached Loyola player Philip Alston, but apparently without malice: He had a McDonald’s bag in his hands, and a video recording caught him yelling, “DoorDash?” Commentators, officials, and players seemed stumped about who ordered the food, but someone finally claimed the delivery. A Duquesne official said he believed the event was staged, and sure enough, a close-up of the delivery guy reveals a microphone clipped to his T-shirt. [TribLive, 1/25/2023]

Inexplicable

During the height of the Covid-19 pandemic, when students in Harvey (Illinois) School District 152 were learning remotely, the district provided meals that families could pick up. According to WGN-TV, food service worker Vera Liddell, 66, allegedly helped herself to some of that food — to be specific, 11,000 cases of chicken wings. Liddell worked for the district for more than a decade. A business manager uncovered the plot during a routine audit, finding “individual invoices signed by Liddell for massive quantities of chicken wings, an item that was never served to students because they contain bones,” prosecutors said. Liddell would place the orders, then pick up the food in a district van. They didn’t reveal what Liddell did with the $1.5 million worth of wings. She was charged with theft. [WGN, 1/31/2023]

An unnamed 27-year-old man was arrested on Jan. 27 in Seattle after a homeowner returned to her house to find him in her bathroom, filling the tub with water. KOMO-TV reported that when police arrived, they discovered a smashed window and the burglar inside, “clothed but very wet, and the bathtub was full of water,” reports said. The intruder would not provide a motive for his strange break-in and was charged with residential burglary. [KOMO, 1/28/2023]

NEWS OF THE WEIRD
© 2023 Andrews McMeel Syndication.
Reprinted with permission.
All rights reserved.

Categories
Fun Stuff News of the Weird

News of the Weird: Week of 03/02/23

Dream Job

Five lucky participants will clear a cool $1,000 to do what they wanted to do anyway: Eat cheese before bedtime. Fox5-TV reported that Sleep Junkie, a mattress review website, hopes to test the legend that eating cheese before bed causes nightmares, so they’re asking “dairy dreamers” to consume a wide variety of cheeses, log their sleep, and provide feedback about sleep quality, energy levels, and bad dreams. The best part? Participants will be reimbursed for the cheese! The catch: You have to sleep alone. [Fox5, 1/20/2023]

Police Report

A 31-year-old woman was charged with two counts of robbery and possession of a weapon (ahem) on Jan. 22 in Winnipeg, Manitoba, after a puzzling attempt to steal a pizza, the CBC reported. Around 3 a.m., she allegedly entered a crowded restaurant and demanded a pizza, brandishing a firecracker as a threat. She was denied the pie, so she lit the firework and ran off with a pizza. Outside the restaurant, she got into a cab, but the driver asked her to get out because she was being belligerent. When the driver stepped out of the car, she jumped into his seat and took off, dragging the 54-year-old several meters down the street. Officers caught up with the stolen cab and caught the pizza thief when she became stuck in a snowbank. [CBC, 1/23/2023]

That Rule Doesn’t Apply to Me

A dump truck driver in Contra Costa County, California, either couldn’t read or didn’t care when he barreled through a road closure barricade on Jan. 23, KTVU-TV reported, and ended up with his front left wheel in a sinkhole. The “road closed” sign was found beneath his vehicle, and the driver escaped without injury. Excessive rains have caused “flooding, mudslides, sinkholes, and other issues” in the area, county officials noted. [KTVU, 1/23/2023]

Bright Idea

If you’re looking for a crafty project for 2023, the online shop Savor has you covered, Slate reported. For the low, low price of $46.95, you can put together your own “In Case I Go Missing” binder, which Savor says “makes it super easy for the true-crime obsessed to record their key stats for their loved ones.” Those facts include medical and financial information, fingerprints, and lists of “hangout spots.” One woman said she added “a hair sample just in case they need it for DNA testing.” Elizabeth Jeglic, a professor at the John Jay College of Criminal Justice, soothingly says, “The majority of adults will not go missing or be kidnapped.” Her colleague Patrick McLaughlin offers some ideas for the kit, though: recent photos; the unlock code for your phone; pics of tattoos, scars, or birthmarks; handwriting samples — but he warns that such binders might not be admissible as evidence. [Slate, 1/22/2023]

That Guy

Dennis Garsjo, 73, of Glasgow, Montana, may not know your name when he greets you on the street, but he’ll call out to you anyway, using your birthday. “Top of the morning to ya, April 11,” he might say, according to KRTV. Garsjo has memorized more than 3,000 birthdays and says he came by the talent naturally. “My mother remembered all our relatives’ birthdays before she started getting dementia,” he said. “I don’t think my talent is all that special. I’m more impressed by musicians who can play a song from memory on the piano.” Still, residents of Prairie Ridge Village, where he works, enjoy The Birthday Guy, as he’s known, and he loves surprising people with their special day. [KRTV, 1/26/2023]

News You Can Use

KFC Thailand partnered with perfume experts during the Lunar New Year to create what every finger-lickin’ good fan wants: fried chicken incense. Oddity Central reported that the incense sticks look good enough to eat and smell even better. Alas, you can’t buy them: The incense will be awarded through a raffle on KFC Thailand’s Facebook page. [Oddity Central, 1/20/2023]

Send your weird news items with subject line WEIRD NEWS to WeirdNewsTips@amuniversal.com. News of the Weird is now a podcast on all major platforms! Visit newsoftheweirdpodcast.com for more.

NEWS OF THE WEIRD
© 2023 Andrews McMeel Syndication.
Reprinted with permission.
All rights reserved.