Category: Memphis Gaydar

With domestic violence making both local and national headlines, including the recent murder of transgender woman Alejandra Leos by her boyfriend, representatives from the Family Safety Center are taking the opportunity to let the LGBT community know their services are available to victims of any sexual orientation.

Vernetta Eddleman and Debbie Coffman from the Family Safety Center will speak at the monthly Tennessee Equality Project (TEP) meeting on September 24th from 6:30 to 8 p.m. at the Memphis Gay & Lesbian Community Center (892 S. Cooper).

The Family Safety Center, which combines civil, criminal, health, and social services for victims of family violence, has worked to make sure their services are LGBT-friendly. The staff has trained with the TEP, and they partner with the Memphis Gay & Lesbian Community Center and HIV/AIDS nonprofit, the Red Door Foundation.

For more on resources for LGBT same-sex domestic violence victims, check out this Flyer article. For more information about the TEP meeting, check out the event’s Facebook page.

Sister Jeannine Gramick, founder of three Dignity USA chapters and the Conference for Catholic Lesbians, will be coming to Memphis next week to lecture on sexual identity from a faith perspective. She’ll be speaking at Marian Hall at Cathedral of the Immaculate Conception (1695 Central) on Wednesday, September 24th from 7 to 9 p.m.

Gramick is also the co-founder of New Ways Ministry, a Catholic LGBT-positive ministry of justice and advocacy, that she launched with Father Robert Nugent.

Gramick conducts spiritual retreats, workshops, and pilgrimages to holy places for the LGBT community and their friends and family.

This month’s Cherry party, billed as “a lezzie shindig,” will feature a burlesque show, a charity drive, and a ghost hunt at Earnestine & Hazel’s on Saturday, August 30th.

Choices, Community HIV Network, Planned Parenthood, and Friends For Life will have tables at the event, and attendees can learn about each charity’s mission and how to donate or volunteer.

The burlesque show will feature LadyDoo Moi, Shannon Will Ryder Herrada, Requi Emma, Macc Onner, and Kitty Wompas. And as always, the party is hosted by singer/comedian Julie Wheeler. Afterward, there will be an informal ghost hunt in the famously haunted bar.

Doors open at 8:30 p.m. There will be two burlesque shows, one at 9:30 p.m. and one at 11:30 p.m. The cover charge is $10 for general admission or $20 for VIP.

On Wednesday, Hernando couple Nathan Tipton and Paul Foster went to the DeSoto County Chancery Court Clerk’s office and recorded their marriage, even though same-sex marriage isn’t legal yet in Mississippi. The pair, who married at the Mall of America in Minnesota in June, were able to record their marriage under “miscellaneous information” in county land records, which, through a bit of a loophole in the state’s law, doesn’t prohibit same-sex couples from recording such information there.

Tipton and Foster were one of 17 Mississippi couples across the state who recorded their marriage this week, an action organized by the Campaign for Southern Equality. The pair recently held a wedding reception for their friends in Memphis at the Jack Robinson Gallery. They took a few minutes to talk about their decision to participate in Wednesday’s action.

Flyer: How and where did you meet? And how long have you two been together?

Nathan: We met on July 31, 1993, on a blind date set up by two mutual friends. We were informed that we were going to a hoe-down at Holy Trinity (I wish I was making that up, but I’m not.). Neither of us knew that the other had been invited until they picked us up.

We had our 21st anniversary on July 31st. I proposed to Paul on July 27, 2013, not long after the Supreme Court overturned [the Defense of Marriage Act].

You married recently in Minnesota. Why Minnesota? Why not wait for Mississippi to get same-sex marriage?

Paul: When we started discussing getting married, Iowa was the closest legal state, but we wanted it to be a “destination wedding” and Iowa doesn’t have any real “destinations.” So we opted to get married at the Mall of America in Minneapolis.

In terms of why we didn’t wait for Mississippi, honestly, we’re not getting any younger.

A number of friends and family followed you to Minnesota for the wedding, right? Tell me about the ceremony.

Nathan: The ceremony was fantastic! We were married at The Chapel of Love by a legit minister (so in case the American Family Association tells me that I’m not married in the eyes of God, I can assure them that we most certainly are). My dad, a retired Presbyterian minister, also participated by reading the homily and giving us words of encouragement. It was absolutely wonderful all around, and we had about 30 to 35 people from all over the country (including high school and college friends, relatives, and other good friends).

And then you also had a reception in Memphis a couple weeks back?

Paul: Yes. We decided because a lot of people couldn’t make the trip to Minneapolis, we wanted to throw a party for our Memphis friends. The “reception-palooza,” as Nate calls it, was August 3rd at the Robinson Gallery in South Main.

Does it feel different being married?

Paul: Not really, but a lot of that is because we’ve been together for so long. Ask us again around tax time, and we might have a different answer for you.

How did you get involved in this Campaign for Southern Equality (CSE) Action?

Nathan: I started getting involved with the CSE earlier this year when they came to Mississippi to help fight the Religious Freedom Restoration Act (what I refer to as the “Keep Out the Gays” bill). I attended a couple of rallies down in Jackson and stayed in contact with them, even though the RFRA got signed into law. About a month ago, they reached out to me and asked if Paul and I would be interested in recording our marriage in DeSoto County, and it didn’t take me two seconds to agree to participate.

Can you explain how you were able to record your marriage in Mississippi?

Nathan: We went to the Chancery Clerk’s office at the DeSoto County courthouse and presented a “recording request,” along with our marriage certificate, to the clerk’s representative. Their office had apparently been apprised that someone would be doing this, so they were ready. There was a little conversation between the clerk’s office employees, but then she came back, took my $20, gave me a receipt, and told us that the marriage certificate would be recorded that day.

Is that largely symbolic or does it come with any benefits?

Paul: It is mostly symbolic, but it makes a statement because now our marriage is entered into the public record. Although it’s not “official” recognition, it’s a way for us to tell Mississippi that gay married couples do in fact live here.

When do you expect we’ll see same-sex marriage in Mississippi?

Nathan: I think Alabama and Mississippi will be fighting each other to see which one will be the last state to recognize same-sex marriage. But I’m continually encouraged by the string of court victories and, if the Supreme Court is ultimately forced to rule on it, I’m cautiously optimistic that they will strike down all the existing bans.

The Williams Institute has released a study that estimates $36.7 million in spending could be added to the state’s economy if Tennessee would extend marriage to same-sex couples.

Here’s how they reached that number:
There are 10,898 same-sex couples living in Tennessee, according to the 2010 U.S. Census. The study estimates that about 50 percent of those couples would choose to marry here in the first three years after marriage was made legal. That’s based on a pattern that has been established in states, such as Minnesota, that do have same-sex marriage.

They estimate that about 3,500 of those marriages would occur in the first year alone, resulting in $23.5 million in revenue for the state.

That dollar figure includes spending on wedding arrangements and tourism by guests of same-sex couples. The study also found that between 111 and 332 jobs would be created in the state’s tourism and recreation sector if same-sex marriage were made legal.

Estimates do not take into account the impact of same-sex couples from other states who will travel to Tennessee to marry.

The full study can be viewed here.