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Fly on the Wall 1425

Kiss, Kiss, Bang

You know, it’s getting easier to see things through the lunatic eyes of Tennessee Rep. Andy Holt (R)-Duh. Per Holt, the Second Amendment exists, in part, to ensure bad guys have access to immense firepower. Because that furnishes good guys with deserving targets. It’s pretty obvious, really — right there in the constitution between the words “well regulated” and “militia” and not all that hard to see if, like Andy, you squint.

Holt had planned to give away an AR-15 semiautomatic, the prefered weapon of mass shooters like Omar Mateen, who killed 49 people and wounded 53 in a Florida gay bar on Sunday. In the Orlando massacre’s horrific wake, Holt’s so consarn mad about the dadgum liberals with their gun control, he wishes he could give away more.

“I’m furious,” Holt writes. “I’m furious that I get phone calls from the media asking me if I’m still going to give away an AR-15 at our HogFest, rather than asking me how many extra firearms I’ll be handing out to ensure people can protect themselves. After all, it was a bullet that stopped the terrorist. Amazing how so many seem to miss that fact.”

Of course, he’s right. A bullet stopped Omar Mateen, the suspected agent who was able to buy an AR-15 like it was a quart of milk. The system works.

First Responder

If you aren’t following Scanner Memphis on Twitter (@ScannerMemphis) you’re missing out on curated “highlights and lowlights” from Memphis area police and fire scanners. Highlights from June include:

• “They called about a man carrying a real cross and a sheet. I’m waiting to engage him.”

• “There is a man who is completely nude, touching himself.”

And the all-time classic …

• “Y’all see that idiot in the silver Nissan?”