For millions of earth’s citizens, the changing of years is a time to critique the past, to fiddle with one’s formula and come up with a new plan of action and, on January 1st, declare to the world, “I resolve to … !”
Well, screw those people. I say New Year’s resolutions are for suckers who don’t have the intestinal fortitude to self-edit on any day of the year that isn’t January 1st. And let’s not kid ourselves: January Firsters never keep their resolutions anyway. Just like Bono said: “Nothing changes on New Year’s day.”
But New Year’s Eve embraces our human failings and rewards those who don’t kid themselves. It’s the Dionysian celebration of all that is good and sincere about not making resolutions. It’s a parade of vices; even if your only vice is not getting to bed at a reasonable hour, you’re already guilty. It’s the indulging in behaviors that polite society says should be given up or performed in moderation the next day.
So this New Year’s Eve, resolve to give up resolutions. Luckily, there’s plenty of folks in the Mid-South prepared to help you do so. …
Looking for something to do for New Year’s? Read the rest of Greg Akers’ cover story, “Breaking With Tradition.”
