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News of the Weird: Week of 03/14/24

Not Likely

• Roderick Jackson of Waskom, Texas, is suing Walmart for $100 million — or “unlimited free lifetime shopping” at any location — in relation to a vague incident from an Omaha Walmart in March 2021. NBC News reported that Jackson alleges there was a “false pretense of shoplifting” that was a violation of his civil rights “based on race/color.” Walmart responded that the suit is “almost identical to a lawsuit he filed against our company in 2021 that was dismissed.” The earlier suit said he suffered emotional stress and pain from the handcuffs. [NBC News, 1/11/2024]

• Joao Pimenta da Silva, 71, of Minas Gerais, Brazil, repeatedly dreamed that gold lay deep under his home, the New York Post reported. To that end, over a year ago, he began digging a hole in his kitchen floor that ended up being 130 feet deep and about 35 inches in diameter. But on Jan. 4, Pimenta’s dreams died when he lost his balance and plunged to his death at the bottom of the cavity. His neighbor Arnaldo da Silva tried to discourage the project, but Pimenta was convinced his dream would come true. In the fall, he suffered head injuries and broken bones. [NY Post, 1/8/2024]

Wait, How Many?

And you thought your glovebox full of unpaid parking tickets was impressive. Police detectives and patrol officers arrested Ahyoka Keith, aka Carol Ann Sumner, on Feb. 16, two weeks after she was charged with an astonishing 322 felonies and 327 misdemeanors by the Spring Township police department in Bellefonte, Pennsylvania. Keith is an over-the-road trucker, and her 649 warrants were related to the theft of thousands of dollars from a relative. [WPMI NBC15, 2/20/2024]

Long-Term Lending

More and more libraries across the country have converted to fine-free lending, and that’s a very good thing for one patron of the Licking County Library in Ohio. WPDE ABC 15 in Columbus reported that an Instagram post shared by the library included video of a poetry book that recently had been returned — about 93 years late. The patron had found the “Heart Throbs” poetry collection at a relative’s house and discovered the due date card inside the front cover, last stamped “Nov 9 ’31.” WPDE estimated the total fine would have been approximately $5,770. [AP, 2/13/2024]

Not Getting It

A 42-year-old resident of Ajax, Ontario, was arrested and charged with impaired driving on Feb. 20 at the Durham Regional police station, where he had driven to complain … about his arrest for public intoxication from earlier that morning. The man asked to speak with a supervisor when he arrived at the station, but officers noticed he seemed to be intoxicated, and, after confirming he had driven himself, issued a breathalyzer test, which the man failed. His license was suspended and his vehicle was impounded.
[DurhamRegion.com, 2/20/24]

Need for Speed

The Hockenheimring racetrack in Baden-Wurttemberg, Germany, was the setting for a Guinness World Record-setting run recently. The speed reached — 92.24 mph — might not sound so impressive, but Fulda University engineering student Marcel Paul attained that velocity in a toy car. Paul spent 10 months modifying the miniature Porsche with the goal of beating the 88 mph made famous by the time-traveling DeLorean DMC-12 in the Back to the Future movies, and in the process created the world’s fasted ride-on toy car. Said one user in the comments on Paul’s Instagram video of the milestone event: “Hell no that looks dangerous.” [Yahoo News, 2/20/2024]

Bleepin’ Birds

Eight potty-mouthed parrots are set to rejoin the rest of their flock at the Lincolnshire Wildlife Park in Boston, United Kingdom, after zoo officials decided that recent efforts to help the dirty birds clean up their act in isolation had shown promise. Steve Nichols, who serves as chief executive of the park, still isn’t sure what will happen when the birds are reunited with their more well-behaved peers. “We could end up with 100 swearing parrots on our hands,” Nichols said. “Only time will tell.” For now, the park does not plan to take down its signs warning visitors of the potential for foul language. [BBC, 2/21/2024]

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NEWS OF THE WEIRD
© 2024 Andrews McMeel Syndication.
Reprinted with permission.
All rights reserved.

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Fun Stuff News of the Weird

News of the Weird: Week of 03/07/24

High Tech

The story about the Alaska Airlines plane that lost a panel while flying at 16,000 feet is all over the news. But it’s the little human-interest stories that really capture us: When the panel flew off and the hole gaped open midair on Jan. 5, someone’s iPhone got sucked out and landed on a roadside in Washington state, Yahoo! News reported. Sean Bates, who found the phone, posted a photo on X showing the phone’s intact screen and a battery life of 44 percent remaining: “Pretty clean, no scratches on it, sitting under a bush,” he posted. Jennifer Homendy of the National Transportation Safety Board said all found phones would be returned to their owners. [Yahoo! News, 1/8/2024]

Inauspicious Award

Kathleen Murray of Sandford, Tasmania, credits bandicoots for helping her win the first-ever World’s Ugliest Lawn competition, The Guardian reported on Jan. 11. The marsupials, Murray said, have “actually liberated me from ever having to mow it again. I’m all for guilt-free weekends, especially since my ex-husband left with the lawnmower back in 2016.” (That must have been a good-looking Toro!) The contest began as Gotland’s (Sweden) Ugliest Lawn, which was conceived to encourage water-saving and environmentally friendly gardening in 2022. “All of [the lawns] were hideous and well worthy of winning, but the winning entry was really, really bad,” said Gotland’s Mimmi Gibson. “It brings me a lot of joy to see all the little creatures who now feel safe to come out during the day in my yard,” Murray said. [Guardian, 1/11/2024]

What’s in a Name?

Or a word? Wayne State University in Michigan has announced its 15th annual list of 10 “long-lost” words that should be resurrected, United Press International reported on Jan. 10. The Word Warriors program has identified “blatherskite” (nonsense), “curglaff” (the shock felt upon diving into cold water), “rawgabbit” (a person who speaks confidently but ignorantly), and “pawky” (having a cynical sense of humor), among others. Let’s get together and twankle during our kaffeeklatsch! [UPI, 1/10/2024]

But Why?

On Jan. 8, as an Air Canada flight prepared to leave Toronto for Dubai, a passenger who had just boarded opened a cabin door and stepped out, falling about 20 feet to the ground. CTV News reported. The passenger was injured, and emergency services were called, the airline said. The flight was delayed but eventually took off. There was no explanation for why the person jumped out. [CTV News, 1/10/2024]

Illustration: Jeanne Seagle

Crime Report

A 32-year-old woman who had been arrested for assault in Boone, North Carolina, took her aggression out on the police car’s backseat on Jan. 2, The Charlotte Observer reported. Boone Police Sgt. Dennis O’Neal said a “substantial amount of padding” had been chewed away, adding up to $650 in damages. The department’s Facebook post suggested they “may need to invest in Kevlar seat covers.” Authorities were still deciding whether to charge her in connection with the car’s damages. [Charlotte Observer, 1/8/2024]

That’s One Way To Do It

The Bean Monger, a coffee shop in Indianapolis, Indiana, next to a wedding venue site, was the site of a “pop-up” marriage on Dec. 31 — with no prior notice that the happy couple and their guests were planning to converge, the New York Post reported. Twenty to 30 people, including an officiant, photographer, and guests, crowded into the small store, where they treated the unsuspecting workers as if they were hired staff. “They were asking us to take coats, purses, and watch personal items as if they had rented us out,” one person said. The wedding party blocked the entrance to other patrons, and when a barista asked them to move, the photographer replied, “No, wait at least five minutes.” The store typically charges $500 for private events, which they have requested from the bride, but she deemed the amount “unreasonable.” [NY Post, 1/8/2024]

Send your weird news items with subject line WEIRD NEWS to WeirdNewsTips@amuniversal.com.

NEWS OF THE WEIRD
© 2024 Andrews McMeel Syndication.
Reprinted with permission.
All rights reserved.

Categories
Fun Stuff News of the Weird

News of the Weird: Week of 02/29/24

News You Can Use

We’ve all seen the restaurant notices about automatic gratuities added for parties of more than six or eight people. A 10-person group in South Bend, Indiana, thought they would beat the system at the Wild Crab restaurant by splitting into two groups of five, WSBT-TV reported. A manager said the group was informed that they’d be subject to the 18 percent gratuity, even though they were seated in different sections of the restaurant. As the party left the restaurant, someone threw crayons at the manager and pepper-sprayed them. Firefighters responded to help the victim of the pepper spray, and a police report was filed. [WSBT, 1/2/2024]

Oops

Someone missed the “Please secure all loose clothing” safety message. On Jan. 5, on the DC Rivals HyperCoaster at Movie World in Oxenford, Australia, the Mirror reported that a scarf became entangled around the wheel of one of the trains, which caused it to stop at the top of a hill. Dozens of riders were stranded, and each was given a harness and told to walk down the stairs to the load station. “All the guests on-board are safe with the ride vehicle stopped in a designated zone,” Warner Bros. Movie World said in a statement. [Mirror, 1/5/2024]

Unconventional Weaponry

The Laconia (New Hampshire) Daily Sun reported on Jan. 5 that police were called to the Market Basket supermarket in Tilton the day before after a “fruity fracas” broke out in the produce section. Social media posts indicated that a watermelon had been used in an assault, and Sgt. Andrew Salmon of the Tilton Police Department confirmed that his department is investigating. Salmon said one person went to the hospital with non-life-threatening injuries “from being struck by a produce item.” A worker who answered the phone at the Market Basket said, “We have been instructed not to say anything.” [Laconia Daily Sun, 1/5/2024]

Awesome!

• King, a rescue dog at the Lost Our Home Pet Rescue in Tempe, Arizona, enjoyed a brief reign among his shelter buddies, Fox10-TV reported on Jan. 11. Sometime around midnight, King managed to break out of his kennel at the shelter and busted out several other dogs. He also found a stash of food and enjoyed a little feast. In the meantime, alarms were triggered; Jodi Polanski, the shelter’s founder, looked at video from the scene and saw the mess. “The police actually came because he set the alarm off,” Polanski said. The unnamed responding officer cleaned up after King’s free-for-all and got the dog settled back in bed. “I was just like, wow, amazing man that he did that,” Polanski said. The rescue’s website indicates that King is no longer looking for a home. [Fox10, 1/8/2024]

• Rodney Holbrook, a 75-year-old retired postman from Wales, had been noticing for a couple of months that small messes in his shed were being mysteriously tidied overnight, the BBC reported. So he set up a camera and caught a little mouse picking up pegs, corks, nuts, bolts, and bird food. Holbrook aptly named the rodent Welsh Tidy Mouse. “Ninety-nine times out of a hundred the mouse will tidy up throughout the night,” Holbrook said. “I don’t bother to tidy up now, I leave things out of the box and they put it back in its place by morning. I’ve added different things to the desk to see if they can lift it,” he said. [BBC, 1/7/2024]

Goals

LuLu Lotus of Mississauga, Ontario, has earned a Guinness World Record for an impressive, if dubious, skill: She blew a 44.1-decibel whistle through her nose. United Press International reported on Jan. 9 that Lotus visited Aercoustics Engineering Ltd. to have her whistle measured in a special room. She said her 5-year-old son has recently discovered he, too, has a nose-whistling ability: “It would be a dream come true if he beat my record one day,” Lotus said. [UPI, 1/9/2024]

Send your weird news items with subject line WEIRD NEWS to WeirdNewsTips@amuniversal.com.

NEWS OF THE WEIRD
© 2024 Andrews McMeel Syndication.
Reprinted with permission.
All rights reserved.

Categories
Fun Stuff News of the Weird

News of the Weird: Week of 06/29/23

Weird Science

Spring weather can be unpredictable, but a man in Ankara, Turkey, got an up-close glimpse of exactly what intense winds can do on May 17, Metro News reported. As Onur Kalmaz looked out his window, trying to check on his car during the storm, he captured on video a sofa flying from a balcony of a 35-story block of apartments nearby. Kalmaz said the sofa crashed into other buildings before falling to the ground. “No one was hurt, but we were pretty scared,” he said. [Metro News, 5/18/2023]

Illustration: Jeanne Seagle

Clothing Optional

• After crashing his truck into a Volusia, Florida, utility pole around 2 a.m. on May 21, completely severing it, 39-year-old Kevin Gardner did the obvious thing: He took off all his clothes and started banging on the front door of a home nearby. ClickOrlando reported that when officers arrived at the home, Gardner had injuries on his face and legs. The truck was registered to him, but he said it had been stolen … and that he’d had seizures and didn’t remember anything. A breath test revealed an illegal blood-alcohol content, and Gardner was held on multiple charges. [ClickOrlando, 5/23/2023]

• In Georgia, residents can now use a digital driver’s license, which can be uploaded to Apple Wallet and allows users to leave their IDs in their bag or pocket at TSA checkpoints. But, as United Press International reported, snapping a selfie for the ID comes with a few rules. “Attention, lovely people of the digital era,” the Georgia Department of Driver Services posted on its Facebook page on May 23. “Please take pictures with your clothes on when submitting them for your Digital Driver’s License and ID. Cheers to technology and keeping things classy!” Put your shirt on. [UPI, 5/25/2023]

The Passing Parade

High school seniors in Marlin, Texas, are getting a few extra days of school tacked on, KWTX-TV reported on May 23. The reason: Twenty-eight of the 33 seniors — about 85 percent — were not eligible to graduate, according to an audit performed by the Marlin Independent School District because they had failed or neglected to complete a course or they had too many absences. The ceremony, originally scheduled for May 25, will take place sometime in June. “They told us that because of the students that didn’t meet the requirements, it wouldn’t be fair for only five students to walk the stage,” said Alondra Alvarado, who is eligible to graduate. Victoria Banda, whose son did not meet the requirements, said they were given very little notice about the change in plans. They had family “traveling in from Mexico” for the original ceremony — “and if anyone knows, it’s not cheap,” she said. Administrators hope the extra time will allow the majority of students to meet the state’s requirements. [KWTX, 5/23/2023]

Florida

• When the Brevard (Florida) Public Schools board met on May 9, the topic of dress codes came up, but it went way beyond hoodies and beachwear, ClickOrlando reported. Vice chair Megan Wright told board members that she has heard concerns about students dressing up as “furries” — people who anthropomorphize animals. District 5 Representative Katye Campbell weighed in: “I’m not a big fan of the furry movement, but … if ‘ears’ means a headband with pointed ears on them, it’s a hair accessory. Tails are different, and students meowing and barking at other students — that’s not cool. But that’s not dress code.” Chairman Matt Susin said his daughter is “tired of furries” at school and the subject comes up at least once a month at his dinner table. Leave it to District 3 Representative Jennifer Jenkins to cut through the kitty litter: “This is not rocket science … If you don’t want tails on kids, just say you don’t want tails.” She said among middle school students, the new thing is barking and meowing at each other, unrelated to furry costumes: “It’s weird, but they’re doing it.” [ClickOrlando, 5/11/2023]

• Omar Gutierrez, 32, of Gainesville, Florida, donned a cat costume before plunging a knife into his roommate’s neck on May 22, WCJB-TV reported. When the victim asked why he stabbed him, Gutierrez said, “It was instinctual.” Police reported that Gutierrez had told the victim a week earlier that he was “not above killing” him; Gutierrez had claimed that the roommate had hurt his cat, although he denied it. Gutierrez was charged with first-degree attempted murder — because, you know, he had to plan the costume. [WCJB, 5/24/2023]

Send your weird news items with subject line WEIRD NEWS to WeirdNewsTips@amuniversal.com.

News of the Weird is now a podcast on all major platforms! To find out more, visit newsoftheweirdpodcast.com.

NEWS OF THE WEIRD
© 2023 Andrews McMeel Syndication.
Reprinted with permission.
All rights reserved.

Categories
Fun Stuff News of the Weird

News of the Weird: Week of 06/08/23

Awesome!

Seventh-grader Dillon Reeves of Warren, Michigan, is being hailed as a hero after he came to the rescue of a wayward school bus on April 26, ABC News reported. Reeves noticed as he was riding the bus home from school that the driver was “in distress.” Superintendent Robert D. Livernois said the student “stepped to the front of the bus and helped bring it to a stop without incident. I could not be prouder of his efforts.” The bus driver had lost consciousness; emergency personnel tended to the driver, and students were delivered home on another bus. [ABC News, 4/27/2023]

Inexplicable

The Madison County (Texas) Sheriff’s Office is investigating the mysterious mutilations and deaths of six cows spread over three counties, Fox News reported on April 22. The cows were found along a highway with their tongues cut out, but strangely, no blood had been spilled and there were no signs of the cattle struggling. Furthermore, investigators said, the carcasses had lain undisturbed by scavengers for several weeks. All the cows were found in the same position: lying on their side, with the face cut along the jawline and the tongue neatly removed. There were no discernible tracks in the area, sheriff’s officers said. They’re working with other law enforcement agencies across the U.S. to identify similar incidents. [Fox News, 4/22/2023]

• The Coniston Tavern in Nuneaton, England, is allegedly haunted by the ghost of a former drinker there, according to the landlord, Andy Gadsby. Fox News reported that on April 24, CCTV video captured an incident where a beer glass suddenly exploded, showering three pals with shards of glass. Earlier, at the same table, a different customer’s glass suddenly slid to the floor. Gadsby said the ghost is Dave, who used to live in an apartment above the pub. “One night he drank a bottle of brandy and had a heart attack and died,” Gadsby said. “Maybe his spirit is around the pub and he’s desperately trying to pinch people’s drinks. The two incidents have spooked people out.” [Fox News, 4/27/2023]

News You Can Use

The Spanish parliament has “overcome the Spain of the past,” as Jesús Martín, director general of the Royal Board on Disabilities, put it, with a vote banning “dwarf bullfighting.” HuffPost reported that this traditional “comic” event features people with dwarfism dressed as firefighters or clowns who chase bulls without doing them any harm. The shows go back decades but are decreasing in popularity. “People with dwarfism are subjected to mockery in public squares in our country,” Martin said. However, some of the performers are objecting to the ban. “They take it for granted that people are being denigrated or laughed at, and it’s the opposite: The respect they have for us is impressive,” said Daniel Calderón, one of the bullfighters. [HuffPost, 4/27/2023]

• Not a moment too soon, Oscar Mayer announced on May 17 that it is changing the name of its iconic Wienermobile to the Frankmobile, CNN reported. The company says the name change “pays homage” to its new recipe for hot dogs, which will roll out this summer. Uh-huh. A company spokesperson said the change is a test; they’ll have “to see if it cuts the mustard” with fans. The Wienermobile first appeared in 1936; 23 of the eye-catching vehicles now travel around the country. [CNN, 5/17/2023]

Bright Idea

Students will go to just about any lengths to get out of a test — even outer space. So it was in Hemlock, Michigan, on May 16, when an enterprising student reported an alien invasion to avoid a math test, according to KTVZ-TV. The student reported that ETs came from the skies in flying saucers and landed on the playground, and the rumors quickly began circulating among the student body on social media. But Superintendent Don Killingbeck wasn’t having it: “We have thoroughly investigated the situation, and there is no evidence of any alien activity on our school grounds,” he said. The prankster has been disciplined, he added. [KTVZ, 5/17/2023]

News of the Weird is now a podcast on all major platforms! To find out more, visit newsoftheweirdpodcast.com.

NEWS OF THE WEIRD
© 2023 Andrews McMeel Syndication.
Reprinted with permission.
All rights reserved.