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Astrology Fun Stuff

Free Will Astrology: Week of 08/17/23

ARIES (March 21-April 19): The Lincoln Calibration Sphere 1 is a hollow globe of aluminum launched into Earth orbit in 1965. Fifty-eight years later, it continues to circle the planet — and is still doing the job it was designed to do. It enables ground-based radar devices to perform necessary calibrations. I propose we celebrate and honor the faithfulness of this magic sphere. May it serve as an inspiring symbol for you in the coming months. More than ever before, you have the potential to do what you were made to do — and with exceptional steadiness and potency. I hope you will be a pillar of inspiring stability for those you care about.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): “Live as though you’re living a second time and as though the first time you lived, you did it wrong, and now you’re trying to do things right.” Holocaust survivor and author Viktor Frankl offered this advice. I wouldn’t want to adhere to such a demanding practice every day of my life. But I think it can be an especially worthwhile exercise for you in the coming weeks. You will have a substantial capacity to learn from your past, to prevent mediocre histories from repeating themselves, to escape the ruts of your habit mind and instigate fresh trends.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Gemini author Jamie Zafron wrote an article titled “To Anyone Who Thinks They’re Falling Behind in Life.” She says, “Sometimes you need two more years of life experience before you can make your masterpiece into something that will feel real and true and raw. Sometimes you’re not falling in love because whatever you need to know about yourself is only knowable through solitude. Sometimes you haven’t met your next collaborator. Sometimes your sadness encircles you because, one day, it will be the opus upon which you build your life.” This is excellent advice for you in the coming months, dear Gemini. You’ll be in a phase of incubation, preparing the way for your Next Big Thing. Honor the gritty, unspectacular work you have ahead! It will pay off.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): You’re entering a phase when you will generate maximum luck if you favor what’s short and sweet instead of what’s long and complicated. You will attract the resources you need if you identify what they are with crisp precision and do not indulge in fuzzy indecision. The world will conspire in your favor to the degree that you avoid equivocating. So please say precisely what you mean! Be a beacon of clear, relaxed focus!

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Unless you are French, chances are you have never heard of Saint-John Perse (1887–1975). He was a renowned diplomat for the French government and a poet who won the Nobel Prize for Literature. Now he’s virtually unknown outside of his home country. Can we draw useful lessons for your use, Leo? Well, I suspect that in the coming months, you may very well come into greater prominence and wield more clout. But it’s crucial for the long-term health of your soul that during this building time, you are in service to nurturing your soul as much as your ego. The worldly power and pride you achieve will ultimately fade like Perse’s. But the spiritual growth you accomplish will endure forever.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): “Life is not so bad if you have plenty of luck, a good physique, and not too much imagination.” Virgo author Christopher Isherwood said that. I’m offering his thought because I believe life will be spectacularly not bad for you in the coming weeks — whether or not you have a good physique. In fact, I’m guessing life will be downright enjoyable, creative, and fruitful. In part, that’s because you will be the beneficiary of a stream of luck. And in part, your gentle triumphs and graceful productiveness will unfold because you will be exceptionally imaginative.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): “You know how crazy love can make you,” write Mary D. Esselman and Elizabeth Ash Vélez in their book Love Poems for Real Life. “On any given day, you’re insanely happy, maniacally miserable, kooky with contentment, or bonkers with boredom — and that’s in a good relationship.” They add, “You have to be a little nuts to commit yourself, body and soul, to one other person — one wonderful, goofy, fallible person — in the hope that happily-ever-after really does exist.” The authors make good points, but their view of togetherness will be less than fully applicable to you in the coming months. I suspect life will bring you boons as you focus your intelligence on creating well-grounded, nourishing, non-melodramatic bonds with trustworthy allies.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): “I don’t adopt anyone’s ideas — I have my own.” So proclaimed Scorpio author Ivan Turgenev (1818–1883). Really, Ivan? Were you never influenced by someone else’s concepts, principles, art, or opinions? The fact is that all of us live in a world created and shaped by the ideas of others. We should celebrate that wondrous privilege! We should be pleased we don’t have to produce everything from scratch under our own power. As for you Scorpios reading this oracle, I urge you to be the anti-Turgenev in the coming weeks. Rejoice at how interconnected you are — and take full advantage of it. Treasure the teachings that have made you who you are. Sing your gratitude for those who have forged the world you love to live in. You now have the power to be an extraordinary networker.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): The Tibetan term lenchak is often translated as “karmic debt.” It refers to the unconscious conditioning and bad old habits that attract us to people we would be better off not engaging. I will be bold and declare that sometime soon, you will have fully paid off a lenchak that has caused you relationship problems. Congrats! You are almost free of a long-running delusion. You don’t actually need an influence you thought you needed.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): If you’re like many of us, you have a set bathing routine. In the shower or bath, you start your cleansing process with one particular action, like washing your face, and go on to other tasks in the same sequence every time. Some people live most of their lives this way: following well-established patterns in all they do. I’m not criticizing that approach, though it doesn’t work for me. I need more unpredictability and variety. Anyway, Capricorn, I suspect that in the coming weeks, you will benefit from trying my practice. Have fun creating variations on your standard patterns. Enjoy being a novelty freak with the daily details.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): In July 1812, composer Ludwig van Beethoven wrote a 10-page love letter to a woman he called “My Angel” and “Immortal Beloved.” He never sent it, and scholars are still unsure of the addressee’s identity. The message included lines like “you — my everything, my happiness … my solace — my everything” and “forever thine, forever mine, forever us.” I hope you will soon have sound reasons for composing your own version of an “Immortal Beloved” letter. According to my astrological analysis, it’s time for your tender passion to fully bloom. If there’s not a specific person who warrants such a message, write it to an imaginary lover.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): At age 32, artist Peter Milton realized the colors he thought he used in his paintings were different from what his viewers saw. He got his eyes tested and discovered he had color blindness. For example, what he regarded as gray with a hint of yellow, others perceived as green. Shocked, he launched an unexpected adjustment. For the next 40 years, all his paintings were black and white only. They made him famous and have been exhibited in major museums. I love how he capitalized on an apparent disability and made it his strength. I invite you to consider a comparable move in the coming months.

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Astrology Fun Stuff

Free Will Astrology: Week of 08/03/23

ARIES (March 21-April 19): Emotions are not inconvenient distractions from reason and logic. They are key to the rigorous functioning of our rational minds. Neurologist Antonio Damasio proved this conclusively in his book Descartes’ Error: Emotion, Reason, and the Human Brain. The French philosopher’s famous formula — “I think, therefore I am” — offers an inadequate suggestion about how our intelligence works best. This is always true, but it will be especially crucial for you to keep in mind during the coming weeks. Here’s your mantra, courtesy of another French philosopher, Blaise Pascal: “The heart has its reasons, which reason does not know.”

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): The famous Taurus TV star Jay Leno once did a good deed for me. I was driving my Honda Accord on a freeway in Los Angeles when he drove up beside me in his classic Lamborghini. Using hand signals, he conveyed to me the fact that my trunk was open, and stuff was flying out. I waved in a gesture of thanks and pulled over onto the shoulder. I found that two books and a sweater were missing, but my laptop and briefcase remained. Hooray for Jay! In that spirit, Taurus, and in accordance with current astrological omens, I invite you to go out of your way to help and support strangers and friends alike. I believe it will lead to unexpected benefits.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): “Did you learn how to think or how to believe?” When my friend Amelie was 9 years old, her father teased her with this query upon her return home from a day at school. It was a pivotal moment in her life. She began to develop an eagerness to question all she was told and taught. She cultivated a rebellious curiosity that kept her in a chronic state of delighted fascination. Being bored became virtually impossible. The whole world was her classroom. Can you guess her sign? Gemini! I invite you to make her your role model in the coming weeks.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): In the coming weeks, I advise you not to wear garments like a transparent Gianfranco Ferre black mesh shirt with a faux tiger fur vest and a coral snake jacket that shimmers with bright harlequin hues. Why? Because you will have most success by being down-to-earth, straightforward, and in service to the fundamentals. I’m not implying you should be demure and reserved, however. On the contrary: I hope you will be bold and vivid as you present yourself with simple grace and lucid authenticity.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): In 1811, Leo scientist Amedeo Avogadro (1776–1856) formulated a previously unknown principle about the properties of molecules. Unfortunately, his revolutionary idea wasn’t acknowledged and implemented until 1911, 100 years later. Today his well-proven theory is called Avogadro’s law. According to my analysis of the astrological omens, Leo, you will experience your equivalent of his 1911 event in the coming months. You will receive your proper due. Your potential contributions will no longer be mere potential. Congratulations in advance!

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Israeli poet Yona Wallach mourned the fact that her soul felt far too big for her, as if she were always wearing the clothes of a giant on her small body. I suspect you may be experiencing a comparable feeling right now, Virgo. If so, what can you do about it? The solution is NOT to shrink your soul. Instead, I hope you will expand your sense of who you are so your soul fits better. How might you do that? Here’s a suggestion to get you started: Spend time summoning memories from throughout your past. Watch the story of your life unfurl like a movie.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Nineteenth-century Libran physician James Salisbury had strong ideas about the proper ingredients of a healthy diet. Vegetables were toxic, he believed. He created Salisbury steak, a dish made of ground beef and onions, and advised everyone to eat it three times a day. Best to wash it down with copious amounts of hot water and coffee, he said. I bring his kooky ideas to your attention in hopes of inspiring you to purge all bunkum and nonsense from your life — not just in relation to health issues, but everything. It’s a favorable time to find out what’s genuinely good and true for you. Do the necessary research and investigation.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): “I’m amazed that anyone gets along!” marvels self-help author SARK. She says it’s astonishing that love ever works at all, given our “idiosyncrasies, unconscious projections, re-stimulations from the past, and the relationship history of our partners.” I share her wonderment. On the other hand, I am optimistic about your chances to cultivate interesting intimacy during the coming months. From an astrological perspective, you are primed to be extra wise and lucky about togetherness. If you send out a big welcome for the lessons of affection, collaboration, and synergy, those lessons will come in abundance.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Please don’t make any of the following statements in the next three weeks: 1. “I took a shower with my clothes on.” 2. “I prefer to work on solving a trivial little problem rather than an interesting dilemma that means a lot to me.” 3. “I regard melancholy as a noble emotion that inspires my best work.” On the other hand, Sagittarius, I invite you to make declarations like the following: 1. “I will not run away from the prospect of greater intimacy — even if it’s scary to get closer to a person I care for.” 2. “I will have fun exploring the possibilities of achieving more liberty and justice for myself.” 3. “I will seek to learn interesting new truths about life from people who are unlike me.”

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Champions of the capitalist faith celebrate the fact that we consumers have over 100,000 brand names we can purchase. They say it’s proof of our marvelous freedom of choice. Here’s how I respond to their cheerleading: Yeah, I guess we should be glad we have the privilege of deciding which of 50 kinds of shampoo is best for us. But I also want to suggest that the profusion of these relatively inconsequential options may distract us from the fact that certain of our other choices are more limited. In the coming weeks, Capricorn, I invite you to ruminate about how you can expand your array of more important choices.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): My best friend in college was an Aquarius, as is my favorite cousin. Two ex-girlfriends are Aquarians, and so was my dad. The talented singer with whom I sang duets for years was an Aquarius. So I have intimate knowledge of the Aquarian nature. And in honor of your unbirthday — the time halfway between your last birthday and your next — I will tell you what I love most about you. No human is totally comfortable with change, but you are more so than others. To my delight, you are inclined to ignore the rule books and think differently. Is anyone better than you at coordinating your energies with a group’s? I don’t think so. And you’re eager to see the big picture, which means you’re less likely to get distracted by minor imperfections and transitory frustrations. Finally, you have a knack for seeing patterns that others find hard to discern. I adore you!

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Is the first sip always the best? Do you inevitably draw the most vivid enjoyment from the initial swig of coffee or beer? Similarly, are the first few bites of food the most delectable, and after that your taste buds get diminishing returns? Maybe these descriptions are often accurate, but I believe they will be less so for you in the coming weeks. There’s a good chance that flavors will be best later in the drink or the meal. And that is a good metaphor for other activities, as well. The further you go into every experience, the greater the pleasure and satisfaction will be — and the more interesting the learning.

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Astrology Fun Stuff

Free Will Astrology: Week of 07/27/23

ARIES (March 21-April 19): You are about to read a thunderbolt of sublime prophecies. It’s guaranteed to nurture the genius in your soul’s underground cave. Are you ready? 1. Your higher self will prod you to compose a bold prayer in which you ask for stuff you thought you weren’t supposed to ask for. 2. Your higher self will know what to do to enhance your love life by at least 20 percent, possibly more. 3. Your higher self will give you extra access to creativity and imaginative powers, enabling you to make two practical improvements in your life.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): In 1991, John Kilcullen began publishing books with “for Dummies” in the title: for example, Sex for Dummies, Time Management for Dummies, Personal Finance for Dummies, and my favorite, Stress Management for Dummies. There are now over 300 books in this series. They aren’t truly for stupid people, of course. They’re designed to be robust introductions to interesting and useful subjects. I invite you to emulate Kilcullen’s mindset, Taurus. Be innocent, curious, and eager to learn. Adopt a beginner’s mind that’s receptive to being educated and influenced. (If you want to know more, go here: tinyurl.com/TruthForDummies)

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): “I could be converted to a religion of grass,” says Indigenous author Louise Erdrich in her book Heart of the Land. “Sink deep roots. Conserve water. Respect and nourish your neighbors. Such are the tenets. As for practice — grow lush in order to be devoured or caressed, stiffen in sweet elegance, invent startling seeds. Connect underground. Provide. Provide. Be lovely and do no harm.” I advocate a similar approach to life for you Geminis in the coming weeks. Be earthy, sensual, and lush. (PS: Erdrich is a Gemini.)

CANCER (June 21-July 22): I hereby appoint myself as your temporary social director. My first action is to let you know that from an astrological perspective, the next nine months will be an excellent time to expand and deepen your network of connections and your web of allies. I invite you to cultivate a vigorous grapevine that keeps you up-to-date about the latest trends affecting your work and play. Refine your gossip skills. Be friendlier than you’ve ever been. Are you the best ally and collaborator you could possibly be? If not, make that one of your assignments.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): There are two kinds of holidays: those created by humans and those arising from the relationship between the sun and Earth. In the former category are various independence days: July 4th in the U.S., July 1st in Canada, July 14th in France, and June 2nd in Italy. Japan observes Foundation Day on February 11th. Among the second kind of holiday is Lammas on August 1st, a pagan festival that in the Northern Hemisphere marks the halfway point between the summer solstice and autumn equinox. In preindustrial cultures, Lammas celebrated the grain harvest and featured outpourings of gratitude for the crops that provide essential food. Modern revelers give thanks for not only the grain, but all the nourishing bounties provided by the sun’s and Earth’s collaborations. I believe you Leos are smart to make Lammas one of your main holidays. What’s ready to be harvested in your world? What are your prime sources of gratitude?

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): For many of us, a disposal company regularly comes to our homes to haul away the garbage we have generated. Wouldn’t it be great if there was also a reliable service that purged our minds and hearts of the psychic gunk that naturally accumulates? Psychotherapists provide this blessing for some of us, and I know people who derive similar benefits from spiritual rituals. Getting drunk or intoxicated may work, too, although those states often generate their own dreck. With these thoughts in mind, Virgo, meditate on how you might cleanse your soul with a steady, ennobling practice. Now is an excellent time to establish or deepen this tradition.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): I’m wondering if there is a beloved person to whom you could say these words by Rumi: “You are the sky my spirit circles in, the love inside love, the resurrection-place.” If you have no such an ally, Libra, the coming months will be a favorable time to attract them into your life. If there is such a companion, I hope you will share Rumi’s lyrics with them, then go further. Say the words Leonard Cohen spoke: “When I’m with you, I want to be the kind of hero I wanted to be when I was 7 years old.”

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Your theme for the coming weeks is “pleasurable gooseflesh.” I expect and hope you’ll experience it in abundance. You need it and deserve it! Editor Corrie Evanoff describes “pleasurable gooseflesh” as “the primal response we experience when something suddenly violates our expectations in a good way.” It can also be called “frisson” — a French word meaning “a sudden feeling or sensation of excitement, emotion, or thrill.” One way this joy may occur is when we listen to a playlist of songs sequenced in unpredictable ways — say Mozart followed by Johnny Cash, then Édith Piaf, Led Zeppelin, Blondie, Queen, Luciano Pavarotti, and Yellow Magic Orchestra. Here’s your homework: Imagine three ways you can stimulate pleasurable gooseflesh and frisson, then go out and make them happen.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): “Fire rests by changing,” wrote ancient Greek philosopher Heraclitus. In accordance with astrological omens, I ask you to meditate on that riddle. Here are some preliminary thoughts: The flames rising from a burning substance are always moving, always active, never the same shape. Yet they comprise the same fire. As long as they keep shifting and dancing, they are alive and vital. If they stop changing, they die out and disappear. The fire needs to keep changing to thrive! Dear Sagittarius, here’s your assignment: Be like the fire; rest by changing.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): There’s ample scientific evidence that smelling cucumbers can diminish feelings of claustrophobia. For example, some people become anxious when they are crammed inside a narrow metal tube to get an MRI. But numerous imaging facilities have reduced that discomfort with the help of cucumber oil applied to cotton pads and brought into proximity to patients’ noses. I would love it if there were also natural ways to help you break free of any and all claustrophobic situations, Capricorn. The coming weeks will be a favorable time to hone and practice the arts of liberation.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): “Silent gratitude isn’t very much use to anyone,” said Aquarian author Gertrude B. Stein. She was often quirky and even downright weird, but as you can see, she also had a heartful attitude about her alliances. Stein delivered another pithy quote that revealed her tender approach to relationships. She said that love requires a skillful audacity about sharing one’s inner world. I hope you will put these two gems of advice at the center of your attention, Aquarius. You are ready for a strong, sustained dose of deeply expressive interpersonal action.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): According to the International Center for Academic Integrity, 95 percent of high school students acknowledge they have participated in academic cheating. We can conclude that just one of 20 students have never cheated — a percentage that probably matches how many non-cheaters there are in every area of life. I mention this because I believe it’s a favorable time to atone for any deceptions you have engaged in, whether in school or elsewhere. I’m not necessarily urging you to confess, but I encourage you to make amends and corrections to the extent you can. Also: Have a long talk with yourself about what you can learn from your past cons and swindles.

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Free Will Astrology: Week of 07/20/23

ARIES (March 21-April 19): Your deep psyche will soon well up with extra creativity and fertility. I hope you will eagerly tap into these gifts. You should assume that you will be more imaginative and ingenious than usual. You will have an enhanced ability to solve problems with vigor and flair. In what areas of your life would you love to gently erupt with a burst of reinvention? Which of your habits might benefit from being cheerfully disrupted? Give yourself permission to change whatever bores you.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): My teacher Paul Foster Case said the color yellow is midway between warm, exciting red and cool, calming blue. “Yellow has an equilibrating influence,” he wrote. “It stimulates the finer functions of the brain, is of assistance in developing alertness and discrimination, and helps to establish emotional balance.” According to my astrological analysis, Taurus, you should emphasize this hue in the coming days. If you call on yellow to help strengthen the qualities Case describes, you will place yourself in sweet alignment with cosmic rhythms.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Because I enjoy joking with you, I am slightly tempted right now to give you one of the following nicknames: Fidgety, Twitch, Jittery, Quivers, or Shakes. But I will take a more serious tack. Let’s instead see if we can influence you to slow down, stabilize your rhythm, get really steady and secure, and stand strong in your foundational power spot. Would you consider adopting any of the following nicknames? Anchor, Unshakable, Sturdy, Rock Solid, Staunch, Steadfast, Resolute.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): The sometimes overly clever author Oscar Wilde said, “When the gods wish to punish us, they answer our prayers.” I reject that warped view of reality and assure you it will have no bearing on your life in the coming weeks. If you formulate your prayers with care and discernment, they will lead you to rewards, not problems. Maybe not the exact rewards you imagined, but still close to your hopes and helpful in the next chapter of your life story. (PS: No sloppy, lazy, careless prayers, please. Be precise and clear.)

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Leo theologian Bernard McGinn defines mysticism as “the consciousness of the immediate presence of God.” In other words, people having a mystic experience are filled with a visceral sensation of the divine intelligence. It’s not just an idea or concept; it’s a deeply felt communion infused with intimate tenderness. You Leos will be more likely than usual to have such contact in the coming weeks — if you want it. If you don’t want it, or don’t believe it’s real, or don’t think it’s possible, well, then, you can of course resist it. But why not give it a whirl? There’s nothing to lose, and it could be fun.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Here’s a parable for you. Once upon a time, there was a woman who could read the future in the night sky. She regarded the planets and stars as her divine informants. On one moonless evening, she took a walk down a dirt road near her home. It was so dark she could barely see two feet ahead of her. Oops! She should have brought a flashlight. Lost in wonder, she gazed up at the heavenly bodies, watching and listening for revelations they might have for her. Then one of the lights, the planet Saturn, whispered, “Stop and look down, friend.” The woman turned her eyes from the sky to the ground just in time to find she was two strides away from stepping into a deep, muddy hole. What’s the moral of the tale? Here are some possibilities: 1. Sometimes the heights provide useful information about the depths. 2. Soaring visions may help you tune in to practical details. 3. To become aware of important facts you’ve overlooked in your daily rhythm, consult your higher mind.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): A Libran writer I know received many rejection notices when he launched his career. I was amazed at how undaunted he was. In fact, he was the opposite of undaunted. He taped copies of his rejection notices to his bedroom wall. Seeing the evidence of his failures motivated him. It drove him to improve his writing and churn out even more articles. It fueled his search for a wider array of publications that might host his work. During the fourth year of this approach, luck and fate turned in his favor. Within the next eight months, 12 of his pieces appeared in print. My muses tell me, Libra, that you need to hear this story right now.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): The cartoon character Bart Simpson is one of the stars of The Simpsons animated TV show. According to him, “Life is a paradox. You’re damned if you do and damned if you don’t.” While that principle may sometimes be true, I believe you will be exempt from it in the coming weeks. In fact, I suspect you will be as free as it’s possible for a human to be of grueling contradictions, frustrating oppositions, clashing truths, and paralyzing contraries. There’s a good chance you will also outwit and avoid annoying incongruities and silly arguments. Congratulations in advance, Scorpio! Take full advantage of this phase of simple clarity.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): The dragon has appeared in the myths and legends of many cultures. Europe, China, and Mesoamerica are just a few places where the fire-breathing flying reptiles have fascinated the human imagination. In some traditions, they are dangerous and predatory. In China, though, they have been harbingers of good fortune and symbols of great power. Emperors claimed the dragon as their special emblem. In assigning the dragon to be your soul creature, Sagittarius, I am drawing from Chinese lore. What would you like to accomplish that would benefit from you having access to fierce, dynamic, indomitable energy? Call on the dragon for help and power.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): “There is a world of people who will love you for who you are,” writes author Cheryl Strayed. “A whole, vibrant, fucked-up, happy, conflicted, joyous, and depressed mass of people.” In the coming months, one of your prime tasks is to specialize in communing with these folks. Make it your intention to surround yourself more and more with interesting, imperfect, ever-changing life-lovers who appreciate you for exactly who you are — and who inspire you to grow more and more into the full idiosyncratic glory of your authentic self.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): What psychic or prophet is most popular with a-list celebrities? I can assure you it’s not me. Few of my millions of readers are world-famous. What about the planet’s most scientifically accurate astrologer? Who might that be? It ain’t me. I don’t regard astrology as a science, and I mistrust those who say it is. In my view, astrology is a mythopoetic language and psychospiritual system that nurtures our souls and helps liberate us from our conditioning. We shouldn’t try to get “scientifically accurate” information from it. Now I encourage you to do what I just did, Aquarius. Have fun telling people who you are not, what you don’t believe in, and which goals you aren’t interested in pursuing.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): To come up with your astrological reports, I study the positions of the sun, moon, and planets in relation to your sign. That’s the technical part of the work, the framework within which I unleash my intuition and imagination. To augment this work, I meditate and pray, asking higher powers to guide me in providing useful information for you. I often consult books written by my favorite astrology writers. (Currently reading Steven Forrest’s The Elements Series.) I also ask my deep mind to slip me info that might not be accounted for by traditional factors. How about you, Pisces? How do you do the work that you love and care about? Now is a good time to take inventory and make necessary adjustments.

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Astrology Fun Stuff

Free Will Astrology: Week of 07/13/23

ARIES (March 21-April 19): Many astrologers enjoy meditating on the heavenly body Chiron. With an orbit between Saturn and Uranus, it is an anomalous object that has qualities of both a comet and a minor planet. Its name is derived from a character in ancient Greek myth: the wisest teacher and healer of all the centaurs. Chiron is now in the sign of Aries and will be there for a while. Let’s invoke its symbolic power to inspire two quests in the coming months: 1. Seek a teacher who excites your love of life. 2. Seek a healer who alleviates any hurts that interfere with your love of life.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): It’s high time for some high culture! You are in a phase to get rich benefits from reading Shakespeare, listening to Beethoven, and enjoying paintings by Matisse and Picasso. You’d also benefit lavishly from communing with the work of virtuosos like Mozart, Michelangelo, and novelist Haruki Murakami. However, I think you would garner even greater emotional treasures from reading Virginia Woolf, listening to Janelle Monáe’s music, and enjoying Georgia O’Keeffe’s paintings. For extra credit, get cozy with the books of Simone Weil, listen to Patti Smith’s music, and see Frida Kahlo’s art. If you read between the lines here, you understand I’m telling you that the most excellent thing to do for your mental and spiritual health is to commune with brilliant women artists, writers, and musicians.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): The French phrase j’ajoute (translated as “I adjust”) is a chess term used when a player is about to adjust their pieces but does not yet intend to make a move. J’ajoute might be an apt motto for you to invoke in the coming days. You are not ready to make major shifts in the way you play the games you’re involved in. But it’s an excellent time to meditate on that prospect. You will gain clarity and refine your perspective if you tinker with and rearrange the overall look and feel of things.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): The Simpsons animated show has been on TV for 34 seasons. Ten-year-old Bart Simpson is one of the stars. He is a mischievous rascal who’s ingenious in defying authority. Sometimes teachers catch him in his rebellious acts and punish him by making him write apologetic affirmations on the classroom blackboard. For example: “I will not strut around like I own the place. I will not obey the voices in my head. I will not express my feelings through chaos. I will not trade pants with others. I will not instigate revolution. I am not deliciously saucy. I cannot absolve sins. Hot dogs are not bookmarks.” In accordance with your unruly astrological omens, Cancerian, I authorize you to do things Bart said he wouldn’t do. You have a license to be deliciously saucy.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Early in her career, Leo actor Lisa Kudrow endured disappointments. She auditioned for the TV show Saturday Night Live but wasn’t chosen. She was cast as a main character in the TV show Frasier but was replaced during the filming of the pilot episode. A few months later, though, she landed a key role in the new TV show Friends. In retrospect, she was glad she got fired from Frasier so she could be available for Friends. Frasier was popular, but Friends was a super hit. Kudrow won numerous awards for her work on the show and rode her fame to a successful film career. Will there be a Frasier moment for you in the coming months, dear Leo? That’s what I suspect. So keep the faith.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): The coming weeks will be a good time to seek helpful clues and guidance from your nightly dreams. Take steps to remember them — maybe keep a pen and notebook next to your bed. Here are a few possible dream scenes and their meanings. 1. A dream of planting a tree means you’re primed to begin a project that will grow for years. 2. A dream of riding in a spaceship suggests you yearn to make your future come more alive in your life. 3. A dream of taking a long trip or standing on a mountaintop may signify you’re ready to come to new conclusions about your life story. (PS: Even if you don’t have these specific dreams, the interpretations I offered are still apt.)

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): In reviewing the life work of neurologist and author Oliver Sacks, critic Patricia Holt said he marveled at how “average people not only adapt to injury and disease but also create something transcendent out of a condition others call disability.” Sacks specialized in collaborating with neurological patients who used their seeming debilitations “to uncover otherwise unknown resources and create lives of originality and innovation.” I bring this up, Libra, because I suspect that in the coming months, you will have extra power to turn your apparent weaknesses or liabilities into assets.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): It’s a mistake to believe we must ration our love as if we only have so much to offer. The fact is, the more love we give, the more we have available to give. As we tap into our deepest source of generosity, we discover we have greater reserves of it than we imagined. What I’ve just said is always true, but it’s especially apropos for you right now. You are in a phase when you can dramatically expand your understanding of how many blessings you have to dole out.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Home computers didn’t become common until the 1980s. During the previous decade, small start-up companies with adventurous experimenters did the grunt work that made the digital revolution possible. Many early adapters worked out of garages in the Silicon Valley area of Northern California. They preferred to devote their modest resources to the actual work rather than to fancy labs. I suspect the coming months will invite you to do something similar, Sagittarius: to be discerning about how you allocate your resources as you plan and implement your vigorous transformations.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): I’m tempted to call this upcoming chapter of your life story “The Partial Conquest of Loneliness.” Other good titles might be “Restoration of Degraded Treasure” or “Turning a Confusing Triumph into a Gratifying One” or “Replacing a Mediocre Kind of Strength with the Right Kind.” Can you guess that I foresee an exciting and productive time for you in the coming weeks? To best prepare, drop as many expectations and assumptions as you can so you will be fully available for the novel and sometimes surprising opportunities. Life will offer you fresh perspectives.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): By 1582, the inexact old Julian calendar used by the Western world for 13 centuries was out of whack because it had no leap years. The spring equinox was occurring too early, on March 10. Pope Gregory commissioned scientists who devised a more accurate way to account for the passage of time. The problem was that the new calendar needed a modification that required the day after October 4 to be October 15. Eleven days went missing — permanently. People were resentful and resistant, though eventually all of Europe made the conversion. In that spirit, Aquarius, I ask you to consider an adjustment that requires a shift in habits. It may be inconvenient at first, but will ultimately be good for you.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Piscean novelist Peter De Vries wrote, “Sometimes I write drunk and revise sober, and sometimes I write sober and revise drunk. But you have to have both elements in creation — the Apollonian and the Dionysian, or spontaneity and restraint, emotion and discipline.” In the coming weeks, you Pisces folks will be skilled at weaving these modes as you practice what you love to do. You’ll be a master of cultivating dynamic balance, a wizard of blending creativity and organization, a productive change-maker who fosters both structure and morale.

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Astrology Fun Stuff

Free Will Astrology: Week of 06/22/23

ARIES (March 21-April 19): When I was still an up-and-coming horoscope columnist, before I got widely syndicated, I supplemented my income with many other jobs. During one stretch, I wrote fortunes for a line of designer fortune cookies that were covered with gourmet chocolate and sold at the luxury department store Bloomingdale’s. The salary I got paid was meager. Part of my compensation came in the form of hundreds of delicious but non-nutritious cookies. If you are offered a comparable deal in the coming weeks and months, Aries, my advice is to do what I didn’t do but should have done: Ask for what’s truly valuable to you instead of accepting a substitute of marginal worth.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): My mentor Ann Davies said that of all the signs of the zodiac, you Tauruses are most likely to develop finely honed intuition. At least potentially, you can tune in to the inner teacher better than the rest of us. The still, small voice rises up out of the silence and speaks to you clearly and crisply. Here’s even better news: I believe you are entering a phase when your relationship with this stellar faculty may ripen dramatically. Please take advantage of this subtly fabulous opportunity! Each day for the next 14 days, do a relaxing ritual in which you eagerly invite and welcome the guidance of your deepest inner source.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): New College in Oxford, UK, has educated students since 1379. Among its old buildings is a dining hall that features beams made of thick oak trees. Unfortunately, most oak wood eventually attracts beetles that eat it and weaken it. Fortunately, the 14th-century founders of New College foresaw that problem. They planted an oak grove whose trees were specifically meant to be used to replace the oak beams at New College. Which they are to this day. I would love you to derive inspiration from this story, Gemini. What practical long-term plans might you be wise to formulate in the coming months?

CANCER (June 21-July 22): In the Northern Hemisphere, the astrological month of Cancer begins with the sun in its greatest glory. Our home star is at its highest altitude, shining with maximum brightness. So then why is the sign of the Crab ruled by the moon? Why do the longest days of the year coincide with the ascendancy of the mistress of the night? Ahhh. These are esoteric mysteries beyond the scope of this horoscope. But here’s a hint about what they signify for you personally. One of your assets can also be a liability: your innocent openness to the wonders of life. This quality is at the heart of your beauty but can also, on occasion, make you vulnerable to being overwhelmed. That’s why it’s so important that you master the art of setting boundaries, of honing your focus, of quaffing deeply from a few cups instead of sipping from many cups.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): The coming weeks will be a delicate time for your spiritual unfoldment. You are primed to recover lost powers, rediscover key truths you have forgotten, and reunite with parts of your soul you got cut off from. Will these good possibilities come to pass in their fullness? Maybe, maybe not. It depends on how brave you are in seeking your healing. You must ask for what’s hard to ask for. You’ve got to find a way to feel deserving of the beauty and blessings that are available. PS: You ARE deserving. I will be cheering you on, dear Leo.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Whether or not you have been enrolled in a learning institution during the past 12 months, I suspect you have been getting a rigorous education. Among the courses you have almost completed are lessons in intimacy, cooperation, collaboration, symbiosis, and togetherness. Have you mastered all the teachings? Probably not. There were too many of them, and they were too voluminous to grasp perfectly and completely. But that’s okay. You have done well. Now you’re ready to graduate, collect your diploma, and apply what you have learned.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): History has provided contradictory reports about Isabeau of Bavaria, who served as queen of France from 1385 to 1422. Was she a corrupt, greedy, and indecisive fool who harmed France’s fortunes? Or was she a talented diplomat with great skill in court politics and an effective leader during the many times her husband, King Charles VI, was incapacitated by illness? I bring these facts to your attention, Libra, hoping they will inspire you to refine, adjust, and firm up your own reputation. You can’t totally control how people perceive you, but you do have some power to shape their perceptions — especially these days.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): The next four weeks will be an excellent time to create and celebrate your own holidays. I recommend you dream up at least four new festivals, jubilees, anniversaries, and other excuses to party. Eight or more would be even better. They could be quirky and modest, like Do No Housework Day, Take Your Houseplants for a Walk Day, or Write Bad Poetry Day. They could be more profound and impactful, like Forgive Your Parents for Everything Day, Walk on the Wild Side Day, or Stay Home from Work Because You’re Feeling So Good Day. In my astrological opinion, Scorpio, you should regard playful fun as a top priority. For more ideas, go here: tinyurl.com/CreateHolidays … tinyurl.com/NouveauHolidays … tinyurl.com/InventHolidays

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): In Greek mythology, Prometheus was a god who stole fire from his fellow gods and gave it to humans to help them build civilization. His divine colleagues were not pleased. Why? Maybe they feared that with the power of fire, people would become like gods themselves and have no further need for gods. Anyway, Sagittarius, I hope you’re in a fire-stealing mood. It’s a good time to raise your whole world up to a higher level — to track down and acquire prizes that will lead to major enhancements. And unlike what happened to Prometheus (the other gods punished him), I think you will get away with your gambits.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Let’s discuss magical doorways. Each time you sleep, you slip through magical doorways called dreams. Whether or not you recall those adventures, they offer you interesting mysteries utterly unlike the events of your daily life. Here’s another example: A magical doorway opens when an ally or loved one shares intimate knowledge of their inner realms. Becoming absorbed in books, movies, or songs is also a way to glide through a magical doorway. Another is when you discover an aspect of yourself, a corner of your being, that you didn’t know was there. I bring these thoughts to your attention, Capricorn, because I suspect the coming weeks will present an extra inviting array of magical doorways.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Psychiatrist Myron Hofer specializes in the mother-infant relationship. Among his findings: The first emotion that a newborn experiences is anxiety. Struggling to get out of the womb can be taxing, and it’s shocking to be separated from the warm, nourishing realm that has been home for months. The bad news is that most of us still carry the imprint of this original unease. The good news, Aquarius, is that the coming months will be one of the best times ever for you to heal. For optimal results, place a high priority on getting an abundance of love, support, comfort, and physical touch.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Curious blends and intriguing juxtapositions are in the works — or at least they should be. Improbable alliances might be desirable because they’re curative. Formulas with seemingly mismatched ingredients might fix a glitch, even if they never succeeded before and won’t again. I encourage you to synergize work and play. Negotiate serious business in casual settings and make yourself at home in a wild frontier.

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Astrology Fun Stuff

Free Will Astrology: Week of 06/08/23

ARIES (March 21-April 19): “Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves,” said psychologist Carl Jung. What was he implying? That we may sometimes engage in the same behavior that bothers us about others? And we should examine whether we are similarly annoying? That’s one possible explanation, and I encourage you to meditate on it. Here’s a second theory: When people irritate us, it may signify that we are at risk of being hurt or violated by them — and we should take measures to protect ourselves. Maybe there are other theories you could come up with, as well, Aries. Now here’s your assignment: Identify two people who irritate you. What lessons or blessings could you garner from your relationships with them?

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): In 1886, a wealthy woman named Sarah Winchester moved into a two-story, eight-room farmhouse in San Jose, California. She was an amateur architect. During the next 20 years, she oversaw continuous reconstruction of her property, adding new elements and revising existing structures. At one point, the house had 500 rooms. Her workers built and then tore down a seven-story tower on 16 occasions. When she died at age 83, her beloved domicile had 2,000 doors, 10,000 windows, 47 stairways, and six kitchens. While Sarah Winchester was extreme in her devotion to endless transformation, I do recommend a more measured version of her strategy for you — especially in the coming months. Continual creative growth and rearrangement will be healthy and fun!

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): “All the things I wanted to do and didn’t do took so long. It was years of not
doing.” So writes Gemini poet Lee Upton in her book Undid in the Land of Undone. Most of us could make a similar statement. But I have good news for you, Gemini. I suspect that during the rest of 2023, you will find the willpower and the means to finally accomplish intentions that have been long postponed or unfeasible. I’m excited for you! To prepare the way, decide which two undone things you would most love to dive into and complete.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Cancerian author Denis Johnson had a rough life in his twenties. He was addicted to drugs and alcohol. Years later, he wrote a poem expressing gratitude to the people who didn’t abandon him. “You saw me when I was invisible,” he wrote, “you spoke to me when I was deaf, you thanked me when I was a secret.” Now would be an excellent time for you to deliver similar appreciation to those who have steadfastly beheld and supported your beauty when you were going through hard times.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Don’t make a wish upon a star. Instead, make a wish upon a scar. By that I mean, visualize in vivid detail how you might summon dormant reserves of ingenuity to heal one of your wounds. Come up with a brilliant plan to at least partially heal the wound. And then use that same creative energy to launch a new dream or relaunch a stalled old dream. In other words, Leo, figure out how to turn a liability into an asset. Capitalize on a loss to engender a gain. Convert sadness into power and disappointment into joy.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): At age 9, I was distraught when my parents told me we were moving away from the small town in Michigan where I had grown up. I felt devastated to lose the wonderful friends I had made and leave the land I loved. But in retrospect, I am glad I got uprooted. It was the beginning of a new destiny that taught me how to thrive on change. It was my introduction to the pleasures of knowing a wide variety of people from many different backgrounds. I bring this to your attention, Virgo, because I think the next 12 months will be full of comparable opportunities for you. You don’t have to relocate to take advantage, of course. There are numerous ways to expand and diversify your world. Your homework right now is to identify three.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Most of us continuously absorb information that is of little or questionable value. We are awash in an endless tsunami of trivia and babble. But in accordance with current astrological omens, I invite you to remove yourself from this blather as much as possible during the next three weeks. Focus on exposing yourself to fine thinkers, deep feelers, and exquisite art and music. Nurture yourself with the wit and wisdom of compassionate geniuses and brilliant servants of the greater good. Treat yourself to a break from the blah-blah-blah and immerse yourself in the smartest joie de vivre you can find.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Over 25 countries have created coats of arms that feature an eagle. Why is that? Maybe it’s because the Roman Empire, the foundation of so much culture in the Western world, regarded the eagle as the ruler of the skies. It’s a symbol of courage, strength, and alertness. When associated with people, it also denotes high spirits, ingenuity, and sharp wits. In astrology, the eagle is the emblem of the ripe Scorpio: someone who bravely transmutes suffering and strives to develop a sublimely soulful perspective. With these thoughts in mind, and in accordance with current astrological omens, I invite you Scorpios to draw extra intense influence from your eagle-like aspects in the coming weeks.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): “When I paint, my goal is to show what I found, not what I was looking for.” So said artist Pablo Picasso. I recommend you adopt some version of that as your motto in the coming weeks. Yours could be, “When I make love, my goal is to rejoice in what I find, not what I am looking for.” Or perhaps, “When I do the work I care about, my goal is to celebrate what I find, not what I am looking for.” Or maybe, “When I decide to transform myself, my goal is to be alert for what I find, not what I am looking for.”

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Vincent van Gogh painted Wheatfield with a Reaper, showing a man harvesting lush yellow grain under a glowing sun. Van Gogh said the figure was “fighting like the devil in the midst of the heat to get to the end of his task.” And yet, this was also true: “The sun was flooding everything with a light of pure gold.” I see your life in the coming weeks as resonating with this scene, Capricorn. Though you may grapple with challenging tasks, you will be surrounded by beauty and vitality.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): I suspect that your homing signals will be extra strong and clear during the next 12 months. Everywhere you go, in everything you do, you will receive clues about where you truly belong and how to fully inhabit the situations where you truly belong. From all directions, life will offer you revelations about how to love yourself for who you are and be at peace with your destiny. Start tuning in immediately, dear Aquarius. The hints are already trickling in.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): The renowned Mexican painter Diego Rivera (1886–1957) told this story about himself: When he was born, he was so frail and ill that the midwife gave up on him, casting him into a bucket of dung. Rivera’s grandmother would not accept the situation so easily, however. She caught and killed some pigeons and wrapped her newborn grandson in the birds’ guts. The seemingly crazy fix worked. Rivera survived and lived for many decades, creating an epic body of artistic work. I bring this wild tale to your attention, Pisces, with the hope that it will inspire you to keep going and be persistent in the face of a problematic beginning or challenging birth pang. Don’t give up!

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Astrology Fun Stuff

Free Will Astrology: Week of 06/01/23

ARIES (March 21-April 19): History tells us that Albert Einstein was a brilliant genius. After his death, the brain of the pioneer physicist was saved and studied for years in the hope of analyzing the secrets of why it produced so many great ideas. Science writer Stephen Jay Gould provided a different perspective. He said, “I am less interested in the weight and convolutions of Einstein’s brain than in the near certainty that people of equal talent have lived and died in cotton fields and sweatshops.” I bring this to your attention, Aries, in the hope it will inspire you to pay closer attention to the unsung and underappreciated elements of your own life — both in yourself and the people around you.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Human life sometimes features sudden reversals of fortune that may seem almost miraculous. A twist in my own destiny is an example. As an adult, I was indigent for 18 years — the most starving artist of all the starving artists I have ever known. Then, in the course of a few months, all the years I had devoted to improving my craft as a writer paid off spectacularly. My horoscope column got widely syndicated, and I began to earn a decent wage. I predict a comparable turn of events for you in the coming months, Taurus — not necessarily in your finances, but in a pivotal area of your life.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): I am weary of gurus who tell us the ego is bad and must be shamed. In my view, we need a strong and healthy ego to fuel our quest for meaning. In that spirit and in accordance with astrological omens, I designate June as Celebrate Your Ego Month for you Geminis. You have a mandate to unabashedly embrace the beauty of your unique self. I hope you will celebrate and flaunt your special gifts. I hope you will honor your distinctive desires as the treasures they are. You are authorized to brag more than usual!

CANCER (June 21-July 22): One study reveals that British people own a significant amount of clothing they never wear. Other research suggests that the average American woman has over a hundred items of clothing but considers just 10 percent of them to be “wearable.” If your relationship to your wardrobe is similar, Cancerian, it’s a favorable time to cull unused, unliked, and unsuitable stuff. You would also benefit from a comparable approach to other areas of your life. Get rid of possessions, influences, and ideas that take up space but serve no important purpose and are no longer aligned with who you really are.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): In July 1969, Leo astronaut Neil Armstrong was the first human to walk on the moon. But he almost missed his chance. Years earlier, his original application to become part of NASA’s space exploration team arrived a week past the deadline. But Armstrong’s buddy, Dick Day, who worked at NASA, sneaked it into the pile of applications that had come in time. I foresee the possibility of you receiving comparable assistance, Leo. Tell your friends and allies to be alert for ways they might be able to help you with either straightforward or surreptitious moves.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Great shearwaters are birds that travel a lot, covering 13,000 miles every year. From January to March, they breed in the South Atlantic Ocean, about halfway between Africa and South America. Around May, they fly west for a while and then head north, many of them as far as Canada and Greenland. When August comes, they head east to Europe, and later they migrate south along the coast of Africa to return to their breeding grounds. I am tempted to make this globe-trotting bird your spirit creature for the next 12 months. You may be more inclined than ever before to go on journeys, and I expect you will be well rewarded for your journeys. At the very least, I hope you will enjoy mind-opening voyages in your imagination.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): One of the central myths of Western culture is the Holy Grail. For over 800 years, storytellers have spun legends about the search for a precious chalice with magical qualities, including the power to heal and offer eternal youth. Sober scholars are more likely to say that the Holy Grail isn’t an actual physical object hidden away in a cave or catacomb, but a symbol of a spiritual awakening or an enlightening epiphany. For the purposes of your horoscope, I’m going to focus on the latter interpretation. I suspect you are gearing up for an encounter with a Holy Grail. Be alert! The revelations and insights and breakthroughs could come when you least expect them.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): June is Dare to Diminish Your Pain Month for you Scorpios. I hope you will aggressively pursue measures to alleviate discomfort and suffering. To address the physical variety, how about acupuncture or massage? Or supplements like boswellia, turmeric, devil’s claw root, white willow bark, and omega-3 fatty acids? Other ideas: sunshine, heating pad, warm baths with Epsom salts, restorative sleep, and exercise that simulates natural endorphins. Please be equally dynamic in treating your emotional and spiritual pain, dear Scorpio. Spend as much money as you can afford on skillful healers. Solicit the help of empathetic friends. Pray and meditate. Seek out in activities that make you laugh.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): A hungry humpback whale can hold more than 15,000 gallons of water in its mouth at once — enough to fill 400 bathtubs. In a funny way, their ability reminds me of you right now. You, too, have a huge capacity for whatever you feel like absorbing and engaging with. But I suggest you choose carefully what you want to absorb and engage with. Be open and receptive to only the most high-quality stuff that will enrich your life and provide a lot of fun. Don’t get filled up with trivia and nonsense and dross.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Funny story: A renowned Hollywood movie mogul was overheard at a dinner party regaling an aspiring actor with a long monologue about his achievements. The actor couldn’t get in a word edgewise. Finally, the mogul paused and said, “Well, enough about me. What do you think of me?” If I had been in the actor’s place, I might have said, “You, sir, are an insufferable, grandiose, and boring narcissist who pathologically overestimates your own importance and has zero emotional intelligence.” The only downside to speaking my mind like that would be that the mogul might ruin my hopes of having a career in the movie business. In the coming weeks, Capricorn, I hope you will consistently find a middle ground between telling the brazen truth to those who need to hear it and protecting your precious goals and well-being.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): When faced with important decisions, most of us benefit from calling on all forms of intelligence. Simply consulting our analytical mind is not sufficient. Nor is checking in with only our deep feelings. Even drawing from our spunky intuition alone is not adequate. We are most likely to get practical clarity if we access the guidance of our analytical mind, gut feelings, and sparkly intuition. This is always true, but it’s extra relevant now. You need to get the full blessing of the synergistic blend. PS: Ask your body to give you a few hints, too!

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Has your intuition been nudging you to revise and refine your sense of home? Have you been reorganizing the domestic vibes and bolstering your stability? I hope so. That’s what the cosmic rhythms are inviting you to do. If you have indeed responded to the call, congratulations. Buy yourself a nice homecoming present. But if you have resisted the flow of life’s guidance, please take corrective measures. Maybe start by reorganizing the décor and furniture. Clean up festering messes. Say sweet things to your housemates and family members. Manage issues that may be restricting your love of home.

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Astrology Fun Stuff

Free Will Astrology: Week of 05/25/23

ARIES (March 21-April 19): My reading of the astrological omens inspires me to make a series of paradoxical predictions for you. Here are five scenarios I foresee as being quite possible in the coming weeks. 1. An epic journey to a sanctuary close to home. 2. A boundary that doesn’t keep people apart but brings them closer. 3. A rambunctious intervention that calms you down and helps you feel more at peace. 4. A complex process that leads to simple clarity. 5. A visit to the past that empowers you to redesign the future.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Do you want a seed to fulfill its destiny? You must bury it in the ground. There, if it’s able to draw on water and the proper nutrients, it will break open and sprout. Its life as a seed will be over. The plant it eventually grows into will look nothing like its source. We take this process for granted, but it’s always a miracle. Now let’s invoke this story as a metaphor for what you are hopefully on the verge of, Taurus. I invite you to do all that’s helpful and necessary to ensure your seed germinates!

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Your meandering trek through the Unpromised Land wasn’t as demoralizing as you feared. The skirmish with the metaphorical dragon was a bit disruptive, but hey, you are still breathing and walking around — and even seem to have been energized by the weird thrill of the adventure. The only other possible downside was the new dent in your sweet dream. But I suspect that in the long run, that imperfection will inspire you to work even harder on behalf of your sweet dream — and this will be a blessing. Here’s another perk: The ordeal you endured effectively cleaned out stale old karma, freeing up space for a slew of fresh help and resources.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Testing time is ahead, but don’t get your nerves in an uproar with fantasy-spawned stress. For the most part, your challenges and trials will be interesting, not unsettling. There will be few if any trick questions. There will be straightforward prods to stretch your capacities and expand your understanding. Bonus! I bet you’ll get the brilliant impulse to shed the ball and chain you’ve been absent-mindedly carrying around with you.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Biologist Edward O. Wilson said that the most social animals are ants, termites, and honeybees. He used the following criteria to define that description: “altruism, instincts devoted to social life, and the tightness of the bonds that turn colonies into virtual superorganisms.” I’m going to advocate that you regard ants, termites, and honeybees as teachers and role models for you. The coming weeks will be a great time to boost your skill at socializing and networking. You will be wise to ruminate about how you could improve your life by enhancing your ability to cooperate with others. And remember to boost your altruism!

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Jack Sarfatti is an authentic but maverick physicist born under the sign of Virgo. He suggests that if we make ourselves receptive and alert, we may get help from our future selves. They are trying to communicate good ideas to us back through time. Alas, most of us don’t believe such a thing is feasible, so we aren’t attuned to the potential help. I will encourage you to transcend any natural skepticism you might have about Sarfatti’s theory. As a fun experiment, imagine that the Future You has an important transmission for you — maybe several transmissions. For best results, formulate three specific questions to pose to the Future You.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): I have five points for your consideration. 1. You are alive in your mysterious, endlessly interesting life, and you are imbued with the fantastically potent power of awareness. How could you not feel thrilled? 2. You’re on a planet that’s always surprising, and you’re in an era when so many things are changing that you can’t help being fascinated. How could you not feel thrilled? 3. You have some intriguing project to look forward to, or some challenging but engaging work you’re doing, or some mind-bending riddle you’re trying to solve. How could you not feel thrilled? 4. You’re playing the most enigmatic game in the universe, also known as your destiny on Earth, and you love ruminating on questions about what it all means. How could you not feel thrilled? 5. You never know what’s going to happen next. You’re like a hero in an epic movie that is endlessly entertaining. How could you not feel thrilled?

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): “Trust those that you have helped to help you in their turn,” advises Scorpio author Neil Gaiman. Let’s make that one of your mantras for the coming weeks. In my astrological understanding, you are due to cash in on favors you have bestowed on others. The generosity you have expressed should be streaming back your way in abundance. Be bold about welcoming the bounty. In fact, I hope you will nudge and prompt people, if necessary, to reward you for your past support and blessings.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): So many of us are starved to be listened to with full attention. So many of us yearn to be seen and heard and felt by people who are skilled at receptive empathy. How many of us? I’d say the figure is about 99.9 percent. That’s the bad news, Sagittarius. The good news is that in the coming weeks, you will have an exceptional ability to win the attention of good listeners. To boost the potential healing effects of this opportunity, here’s what I recommend: Refine and deepen your own listening skills. Express them with panache.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Because you’re a Capricorn, earthiness is probably one of your strengths. It’s your birthright to be practical and sensible and well-grounded. Now and then, however, your earthiness devolves into muddiness. You get too sober and earnest. You’re bogged down in excess pragmatism. I suspect you may be susceptible to such a state these days. What to do? It may help if you add elements of air and fire to your constitution, just to balance things out. Give yourself a secret nickname with a fiery feel, like Blaze, or a crispy briskness, like Breezy. What else could you do to rouse fresh, glowing vigor, Breezy Blaze — even a touch of wildness?

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): I love to use metaphors in my writing, but I hate to mix unrelated metaphors. I thrive on referring to poetry, sometimes even surrealistic poetry, but I try to avoid sounding like a lunatic. However, at this juncture in your hero’s journey, Aquarius, I frankly feel that the most effective way to communicate with you is to offer you mixed metaphors and surrealist poetry that border on sounding lunatic. Why? Because you seem primed to wander around on the edges of reality. I’m guessing you’ll respond best to a message that’s aligned with your unruly mood. So here goes: Get ready to surf the spiritual undertow all the way to the teeming wilderness on the other side of the cracked mirror. Ignore the provocative wasteland on your left and the intriguing chaos on your right. Stay focused on the stars in your eyes and devote yourself to wild joy.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): “The gift of patience opens when our body, heart, and mind slow enough to move in unison.” So says Piscean poet Mark Nepo. I feel confident you are about to glide into such a grand harmony, dear Pisces. Through a blend of grace and your relaxed efforts to be true to your deepest desires, your body, heart, and mind will synchronize and synergize. Patience will be just one of the gifts you will receive. Others include: a clear vision of your most beautiful future; a lucid understanding of what will be most meaningful to you in the next three years; and a profound sense of feeling at home in the world wherever you go.

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Astrology Fun Stuff

Free Will Astrology: Week of 05/11/23

ARIES (March 21-April 19): All of us are always telling ourselves stories — in essence, making movies in our minds. We are the producer, the director, the special effects team, the voice-over narrator, and all the actors in these inner dramas. Are their themes repetitious and negative or creative and life-affirming? The coming weeks will be a favorable time to work on emphasizing the latter. If the tales unfolding in your imagination are veering off in a direction that provokes anxiety, reassert your directorial authority. Firmly and playfully reroute them so they uplift and enchant you.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): A famous football coach once said his main method was to manipulate, coax, and even bully his players into doing things they didn’t like to do. Why? So they could build their toughness and willpower, making it more likely they would accomplish formidable feats. While this may be an approach that works for some tasks, it’s not right for many others. Here’s a further nuance: The grind-it-out-doing-unpleasant-things may be apt for certain phases of a journey to success, but not for other phases. Here’s the good news, Taurus: For now, you have mostly completed doing what you don’t love to do. In the coming weeks, your freedom to focus on doing fun things will expand dramatically.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Most of us have an area of our lives where futility is a primary emotion. This may be a once-exciting dream that never got much traction. It could be a skill we possess that we’ve never found a satisfying way to express. The epicenter of our futility could be a relationship that has never lived up to its promise or a potential we haven’t been able to ripen. Wherever this sense of fruitlessness resides in your own life, Gemini, I have an interesting prediction: During the next 12 months, you will either finally garner some meaningful fulfillment through it or else find a way to outgrow it.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Many of us Cancerians have high levels of perseverance. Our resoluteness and doggedness may be uncanny. But we often practice these subtle superpowers with such sensitive grace that they’re virtually invisible to casual observers. We appear modest and gentle, not fierce and driven. For instance, this is the first time I have bragged about the fact that I have composed over 2,000 consecutive horoscope columns without ever missing a deadline. Anyway, my fellow Crabs, I have a really good feeling about how much grit and determination you will be able to marshal in the coming months. You may break your own personal records for tenacity.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Why do migrating geese fly in a V formation? For one thing, it conserves their energy. Every bird except the leader enjoys a reduction in wind resistance. As the flight progresses, the geese take turns being the guide in front. Soaring along in this shape also seems to aid the birds’ communication and coordination. I suggest you consider making this scenario your inspiration, dear Leo. You are entering a phase when synergetic cooperation with others is even more important than usual. If you feel called to lead, be ready and willing to exert yourself — and be open to letting your associates serve as leaders. For extra credit: Do a web search for an image of migrating geese and keep it in a prominent place for the next four weeks.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): I boldly predict that you will soon locate a missing magic key. Hooray! It hasn’t been easy. There has been luck involved, but your Virgo-style diligence and ingenuity has been crucial. I also predict that you will locate the door that the magic key will unlock. Now here’s my challenge: Please fulfill my two predictions no later than the solstice. To aid your search, meditate on this question: “What is the most important breakthrough for me to accomplish in the next six weeks?”

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Losing something we value may make us sad. It can cause us to doubt ourselves and wonder if we have fallen out of favor with the Fates or are somehow being punished by God. I’ve experienced deflations and demoralizations like that on far more occasions than I want to remember. And yet, I have noticed that when these apparent misfortunes have happened, they have often opened up space for new possibilities that would not otherwise have come my way. They have emptied out a corner of my imagination that becomes receptive to a fresh dispensation. I predict such a development for you, Libra.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Kissing is always a worthy way to spend your leisure time, but I foresee an even finer opportunity in the coming weeks: magnificent kissing sprees that spur you to explore previously unplumbed depths of wild tenderness. On a related theme, it’s always a wise self-blessing to experiment with rich new shades and tones of intimacy. But you are now eligible for an unusually profound excursion into these mysteries. Are you bold and free enough to glide further into the frontiers of fascinating togetherness?

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Antonie van Leeuwenhoek (1632–1723) worked at a variety of jobs. He sold cloth. He was a land surveyor and bookkeeper. He managed the household affairs of his city’s sheriffs, and he supervised the city’s wine imports and taxation. Oh, by the way, he also had a hobby on the side: lens-making. This ultimately led to a spectacular outcome. Leeuwenhoek created the world’s first high-powered microscope and was instrumental in transforming microbiology into a scientific discipline. In accordance with astrological omens, I propose we make him your inspirational role model in the coming months, Sagittarius. What hobby or pastime or amusement could you turn into a central passion?

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): I wonder if you weren’t listened to attentively when you were a kid. And is it possible you weren’t hugged enough or consistently treated with the tender kindness you deserved and needed? I’m worried there weren’t enough adults who recognized your potential strengths and helped nurture them. But if you did indeed endure any of this mistreatment, dear Capricorn, I have good news. During the next 12 months, you will have unprecedented opportunities to overcome at least some of the neglect you experienced while young. Here’s the motto you can aspire to: “It’s never too late to have a fruitful childhood and creative adolescence.”

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): As I’ve explored the mysteries of healing my traumas and disturbances over the past 20 years, I’ve concluded that the single most effective healer I can work with is my own body. Expert health practitioners are crucial, too, but their work requires my body’s full, purposeful, collaborative engagement. The soft warm animal home I inhabit has great wisdom about what it needs and how to get what it needs and how to work with the help it receives from other healers. The key is to refine the art of listening to its counsel. It has taken me a while to learn its language, but I’m making good progress. Dear Aquarius, in the coming weeks, you can make great strides in developing such a robust relationship with your body.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Can we surmise what your life might be like as the expansive planet Jupiter rumbles through your astrological House of Connections and Communications during the coming months? I expect you will be even more articulate and persuasive than usual. Your ability to create new alliances and nurture old ones will be at a peak. By the way, the House of Communications and Connections is also the House of Education and Acumen. So I suspect you will learn a LOT during this time. It’s likely you will be brainier and more perceptive than ever before. Important advice: Call on your waxing intelligence to make you wiser as well as smarter.