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Bartlett Man

According to WREG, “A Bartlett man is behind bars after allegedly giving his neighbors the shock of their lives.”

It’s hard to know what’s sadder about this story, that poor 65-year-old Martin Centobie was out riding his bicycle in the buff — something that’s never comfortable for anybody — or that this was the shock of anybody’s life.

The report went on to note that “after his afternoon ride, the suspect reportedly went behind a wooden fence where he put on his clothes.” Because dressing in front of people would be immodest.

Hello, Boris

Speaking of WREG, Channel 3, in a party-line vote last Thursday, the FCC altered the rules to allow the unabashedly right-wing media company Sinclair Broadcast to acquire Tribune Media.

That means WREG, a Tribune property, will soon be a Sinclair station. That also means several times a week Mid-Southerners will be subjected to the political opinions of former Trump staffer Boris Epshteyn, a man whose informed commentary can sound an awful lot like paraphrased versions of a POTUS tweet-storm. Oh goody.

Neverending Elvis

Last week the Guardian, a British news and media website, ran with this terribly subtle headline: “Constipation killed Elvis — here’s how to avoid his fate.”

Folks who want to know more about that can either Google it on their own or just eat more fiber.