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Film/TV TV Features

Young Rock

There’s one thing you can say about Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson — he’s big. Yes, the former Miami Hurricanes defensive tackle turned professional wrestler is physically large — officially, he’s a 6-foot-5, 260-pound pile of muscle and tattoos — but his personality and ambitions are also cartoonishly outsized.

When he was in his wrestling prime around the turn of the century, he attracted the biggest audiences WWE ever saw. But for the last 20 years or so, Johnson has been a movie star. After making his debut as a supporting actor in 2001 with The Mummy Returns, he immediately booked his first lead role in that film’s prequel, 2002’s The Scorpion King. In 2011’s Fast Five, he gave the struggling Fast & Furious series a shot in the arm, introducing a new character and transforming the car-chase franchise into the weird semi-spy thriller thing that is scheduled to clock its 10th installment in 2023.

Notice I called Johnson a “movie star” instead of an “actor.” That’s because actors transform themselves for each new role, while movie stars transform each role into a conduit for the persona they’re selling. John Wayne, for example, always played John Wayne, even when he was ostensibly playing Genghis Khan. Next year, people won’t go to see what Luke Hobbs is up to in Fast X, they’ll go to see The Rock drive cars real fast.

Johnson’s larger-than-life persona, and how it got to be so dang big, is the subject of Young Rock, which is probably the first ever biographical comedy series about someone who is not a comedian — or even very funny. It’s 2032, and Johnson is running for president. He appears on a chat show hosted by Randall Park (playing himself, as several people, including Johnson, do in the future-now world of 2032), where he starts telling stories about his life. As each story unfolds we flash back to the appropriate period of Rock lore: Adrian Groulx plays him at age 10, Bradley Constant at 15, and Uli Latukefu as the young adult Rock.

Johnson’s had a pretty interesting life to provide fodder for the show. He was a third-generation wrestler — his father was Rocky “Soul Man” Johnson, the first Black champion in WWE history, and his mother Ata was the daughter of Samoan wrestling legend Peter Maivia. There’s also a colorful cast of characters, including André the Giant (Matthew Willig), The Iron Sheik (Brett Azar), and “Macho Man” Randy Savage (Kevin Makely), just to name a few.

Both Soul Man and The Rock went through the famously wild Memphis wrestling market on their way to stardom. Rocky was a rival of Jerry “The King” Lawler. Later, Johnson would introduce memories of his stint in the Mid-South with the words, “I was working in Memphis, and it was a grind.”

We know the feeling, Rock.

But it must not have been too bad because after two seasons filming in Queensland, Australia, Young Rock moved company to Memphis. The first episode filmed in the Bluff City, “The People Need You,” premiered last Friday. At the end of season 2, Johnson had just lost the 2032 election to Senator Brayden Taft (Michael Torpey). As season 3 dawns, Park, who functions as the audience surrogate who listens to The Rock’s tall tales, has a new show with a co-host he hates. Johnson has gone into seclusion following his election loss, but after a viral video surfaces of The Rock signing a kid’s autograph, Park goes to visit his old friend, who is spending his time puttering around his farm quoting Theodore Roosevelt’s “The Man in the Arena” speech.

Becky Lynch guest stars as Cyndi Lauper.

The episode’s time jumps and wacky portrayals of real people show that Young Rock didn’t lose a step when it leapt continents. The production values are first-rate — at one point, Downtown’s Front Street is transformed into Saudi Arabia. Johnson recalls the events which led to the downfall of his father’s career, which included an international contract dispute with Vince McMahon (Adam Ray) and a visit to a music video release party for Cyndi Lauper’s (Irish wrestler Becky Lynch) theme song for The Goonies.

Johnson has been pretty open about his ambitions to enter politics, and Young Rock seems designed to burnish his image as a saintly everyman while getting people used to seeing the wrestler/actor as a political candidate. It’s a strategy that has worked before, first with Donald Trump’s stint on another NBC show, The Apprentice. The second time was TV comedian Volodymyr Zelenskyy, who was elected president of Ukraine in April 2019 and was then promptly extorted by Trump, who attempted to get him to lie about Hunter Biden in exchange for American military assistance. The incident led to Trump’s first impeachment. Now, Zelenskyy is a hero of democracy, leading his people against the genocidal Russian invasion. Let’s hope The Rock takes after him.

Young Rock is airing on NBC and streaming on Peacock.

Categories
News The Fly-By

MEMernet: TikTok Joy, Ja and The Rock, and Ivermectin

Memphis on the internet.

Joy

The MEMernet cares not that this TikTok video was posted in February. The joy of watching a bunch dudes dive into a puddle is worth a view anytime.

Tweet of the Week

Posted to Twitter by Ja Morant and Dwayne Johnson

Sports podcaster and writer Francis Carlota stirred up some MEMernet magic last week. He suggested Ja Morant and Dwayne Johnson meet up at FedExForum in the postseason (for some reason).

Johnson replied, “I made my bones and came up in Memphis!!! That’s my city! I wrestled every Saturday morning at the channel 5 tv station and every Monday night I wrestled at the Big Top flea market.”

Morant seemed open to the meeting, tweeting simply, “Yeah, pull up
@theRock.”

Frank, Frank, Frank

These tweets tell you everything you need to know about our Tennessee General Assembly.

“Like many GOP-led states, TN just made ivermectin available to anyone. Quote of the session from sponsor @SenFrankNiceley: ‘It’s a lot safer to go to your pharmacist and let him tell you how much ivermectin to take than it is to go to the co-op and guess what size horse you are.’” — From Nashville Public Radio reporter Blake Farmer

Categories
Film Features Film/TV

Furious 7

[After a preview screening of Furious 7, my wife Laura Jean Hocking and I sat on our back deck and pondered what we had just watched. Neither of us had ever seen a Fast & Furious movie before. What follows is an approximate transcript of our conversation.]

Laura Jean Hocking: I am now a person who has seen a Fast & Furious movie.

Chris McCoy: Did it live up to your expectations?

LJH: I wasn’t expecting to get a migraine, but in retrospect it was inevitable. My head hurts all over — behind my eyes, on my forehead, on top.

CM: It was pretty punishing.

LJH: My eyes were twitching and I kept catching whiffs of random aromas, like perfume that smelled like candy and cake. I thought I was having a stroke.

CM: It was a giant commercial. Did you notice how all of the bad guys drove Mercedes, and the good guys drove domestics? Except for the time Paul Walker was driving a Subaru.

LJH: And the Corona.

CM: Oh god, the Corona.

LJH: Why does the supposed hero of the movie drink such shitty beer?

CM: It’s a class thing.

LJH: At least Kurt Russell had some taste.

CM: Kurt Russell was the best part of the movie.

LJH: Ludacris was good.

CM: He was funny. But the rest of the movie was a bunch of bald white guys punching each other.

LJH: AND RUNNING THEIR CARS HEAD-ON INTO EACH OTHER! WTF?

CM: Seriously, the protagonist and the antagonist were too stupid to avoid killing themselves in a game of chicken. Except that they didn’t die, because they’re dudebro superheroes.

LJH: The hacker chick had no personality except for British.

CM: She had an accent instead of a personality.

LJH: Also, there’s no way that wifey person could have known the sex of her baby. You have to be more pregnant before you find that out. Or she was the skinniest pregnant woman ever. And Michelle Rodriguez just looked like she smelled something bad the whole time.

CM: She had one expression: constipated.

LJH: Maybe she had a migraine from all that camera movement.

CM: That damned stuttery video effect kicked in every time there was a fight. They wanted it to look like a Bourne movie.

LJH: I spent a lot of those scenes with my eyes closed so I wouldn’t puke.

CM: It was like it was trying to be a James Bond movie, too. It even had three exotic locations, like the James Bond movies of the ’70s did. This is the seventh one of these, which makes it the equivalent of Diamonds Are Forever, which seems about right, quality-wise. And they kept ripping off James Cameron movies. They had the aircraft in the tunnel thing from Terminator 2, and the Mary Elizabeth Whatshername fake drowning gag from The Abyss

LJH: Who drowned?

CM: The bald white guy.

LJH: Vin or The Rock?

CM: He didn’t drown. Michelle Rodriguez did the “Don’t you die on me!” thing with him after he jumped his car into a helicopter. Every time he got a plan, it was pretty much “drive the car off the cliff.” That skyscraper jump was cool, though.

LJH: Vin Diesel and The Rock seemed like the same person to me. Also the bad and guy and the dead guy. Although I did have my eyes closed a lot, so I might have missed some important character development.

CM: The Rock was the one in the hospital who miraculously healed himself with the force of his man-rage and then shot up the helicopter with a handheld chain gun.

LJH: He was in the hospital for like 90 minutes.

CM: Speaking of which, the military was taking a pretty lackadaisical attitude toward the widespread use of heavy ordinance in downtown Los Angeles.

LJH: I debated leaving and walking over to Whole Foods to drink beer in the BBQ shack.

CM: Do you wish you had?

LJH: No. I survived. Now that I have seen one of those movies, I can have an opinion. Which was pretty much what I thought it would be, except for my new boyfriend Ludacris. He has nice eyes.