If you've ever wanted to know what it felt like to push Tom Holland out of an airplane, Uncharted is the film for you!
The Super Bowl is over (who won again?), and you’re looking to get out of the house and catch a flick. You’ve got a lot of variety to choose from in Memphis theaters this weekend.
The big debut is Uncharted, a $120 million adaptation of the hit video game series starring Mark Wahlberg and the spider-guy who is arguably the biggest movie star in the world right now, Tom Holland. Zombieland director Ruben Fleischer’s film is an origin story for Uncharted‘s fortune hunter Nathan Drake, and an action-adventure in the tradition of Raiders of the Lost Ark and Tomb Raider. Judging from the trailer, you’ll believe 15th-century caravels can fly!
The other new release this weekend is Dog, starring Channing Tatum as a PTSD’d vet of the War on Terror who gets a simple assignment: Drive a decorated war vet to their partner’s funeral. What seems like a milk run turns into a nightmare when the passenger turns out to be a total bitch.
But now, the real reason I’ve called you all together here on Al Gore’s interwebs: One of you is a MURDERER! Well, not really (But maybe? Who knows?), but that’s what Agatha Christie’s fastidious detective Hercule Poirot says in Death on the Nile. Kenneth Branagh plays Poirot and directs an all-star cast, including Annette Bening, Russell Brand, and a champagne-swilling Gal Gadot, in this adaptation of Christie’s quintessential detective mystery.
If that’s not enough Kenneth Branagh for you (and really, can anyone have enough Branagh in their life?), Belfast, his black-and-white, semi-memoir of growing up in Ireland during the Troubles is still at Malco Ridgeway. The film was nominated for seven Academy Awards, including Best Picture, Best Director, and Best Supporting Actress for Dame Judi Dench.
If you’re looking for a total disaster, Roland Emmerich has got you covered with Moonfall. Realism has never been his strong suit, nor has logic or taste or respect for basic norms of filmmaking, and this one is no exception. You’ll believe the moon can’t fly!
And finally, if you can’t believe a boat can fly, or that a dog can earn a purple heart (spoiler alert: they can), or that Kenneth Branagh is interesting, or literally anything about Moonfall, maybe you’ll believe that extremely hot person Jennifer Lopez can be hot for comedic sad-sack Owen Wilson. If that’s the case, then set sail for rom-com island with Marry Me.
Gal Gadot takes out the garbage in Wonder Woman 1984.
Mark Cousins’ Women Make Film provided some much-needed solace when it aired this autumn on Turner Classic Movies. The 14-hour documentary series traced the overlooked contributions of female directors from Alice Guy Blaché to Greta Gerwig. Using the frame of a virtual film school, Cousins narrated clips from literally hundreds of films, demonstrating how the directors achieved effects like controlling the flow of time, or how to use sex scenes to advance the story.
For the action section, Cousins presented one of the most iconic moments the superhero genre ever produced: Wonder Woman’s charge across No Man’s Land from Patty Jenkins’ 2017 film. It is the perfect encapsulation of the character’s appeal. The men are hunkered down in their trenches, insisting the problem can’t be solved. They’ve tried nothing, and they’re all out of ideas! Wonder Woman quickly assesses the situation, straps on her armor, and gets it done, exposing the men’s macho posturing as mere vanity.
WTF WW? Wonder Woman 1984 Crashes the Invisible Jet (2)
In the context of a highlight reel from legends like Ida Lupino and Agnès Varda, the scene more than holds its own. Jenkins starts out intimate, with Gal Gadot as Diana Prince doffing a drab cloak to reveal her colorful armor, then expands steadily to reveal the sweep of the battlefield, and the strength of the forces opposing our hero. The hail of bullets Diana deflects with her shield stand in for every cruel and cutting remark offered by a sneering man to every woman who knew what they doing but couldn’t get anyone to listen to her.
Where the hell was that Patty Jenkins for Wonder Woman 1984? The much-anticipated sequel comes after a horrible, superhero-less year. We could use a little uplift right now, at the end of four years of Trump’s macho misrule, and who better to deliver it than the symbol of female competence and virtue?
Gal Gadot was up for the challenge. The genetically superior super-being is a quintessential movie star, able to hold the screen by just being there. Her first turn at Wonder Woman proved that, while she may not be Meryl Streep, she’s got the chops to deliver some light comedy and pathos along with the Amazonian gravitas. After an opening flashback in which young Diana competes in a kind of Themysciran ultra-quidditch, Gadot makes her entrance in full super-mode. Some crooks in the employ of Trumpian TV rich guy Maxwell Lord (Pedro Pascal) are busting up a jewelry store which acts as a front for international antiquities smuggling. Since we’re in 1984, the action takes place in a mall. Wonder Woman intervenes to throw out quips and tie up bad guys while preserving Reagan-era shopping enjoyment.
Emotionally balanced career woman Diana Prince enjoys a relaxing day at the mall in Wonder Woman 1984.
We last saw Wonder Woman in 1918, but since she’s a demigoddess, she hasn’t aged a day. Being an emotionally balanced career woman rather than entitled basket case like Batman, Diana’s got a day job as an anthropologist for the Smithsonian. It’s rewarding, but she faces the classic problem of an immortal living among mortals: loneliness. Her true love Steve Trevor (Chris Pine) sacrificed himself for the greater good at the end of the last movie, so despite Diana literally being the perfect woman, she sips her pinot alone.
Diana makes a new work friend in frazzled archeologist Barbara Minerva (Kristen Wiig), and the two are called on to find the provenance of a mysterious artifact rescued from the mall robber’s haul. It’s a crystal bound with a metal band, inscribed with Latin that claims to grant wishes. Diana finds the artifact has real power when she inadvertently uses it to bring Steve back to life. When Barbara wishes she could be “more like Diana,” she is shocked to gain not only the ability to walk gracefully in heels, but also super strength and nigh-invulnerability.
Gal Gadot and Chris Pine answer the question, ‘Are they really going to bring the Invisible Jet into this movie?’
It’s about here, as we enter hour two of a film that is two minutes shorter than Apocalypse Now, that the writers of Wonder Woman 1984 discover what Dungeon Masters have known for years: If you introduce an artifact that grants wishes, you have to use it sparingly, or your narrative will quickly fly off the rails. While Diana enjoys some well-deserved (and, to be fair, well-acted) canoodling with Stevie-boy, Maxwell Lord charms the still-naive Barbara into giving up the wish crystal. He then wishes to actually become the wish crystal.
Pedro Pascal as Maxwell Lord, about to confess he has no idea what he’s doing.
I’m not sure why the standard “I wish for unlimited wishes” gambit wouldn’t have worked, but I’m just here to observe and report. Lord’s poor wishmanship leads to a situation where he can’t wish things for himself, but must force others to wish things to him. It turns out that the wish-granting magic balances the universe by taking away something of equal value from the wisher. Ain’t that always the way? Lord’s play is to use that “take things away” power as leverage over the wishers. This leads to a shockingly ill-conceived scene where Lord cons an Arab leader out of his oil by restoring his ancestral caliphate. It really is 1984, Iranian hostage crisis xenophobia and all!
Meanwhile, Barbara has lost the humor and humanity that made her Diana’s only friend as she becomes Wonder Woman’s arch enemy Cheetah. Wiig is, of course, an incredibly gifted comic actor. She and Jenkins seems to be going for something similar to Michelle Pfeiffer’s transformation from Serena Kyle to Catwoman in Batman Returns, but it never gels. It doesn’t help that Cheetah’s final costume makes her look like a stray from Cats.
Kristin Wiig as Jellicle supervillain Cheetah.
From there, Wonder Woman 1984 steadily loses coherence as it slogs towards an uninspired climax. Jenkins’ intention seemed to have been to resurrect the positive spirit of the Richard Donner Superman films, a worthy goal to counteract the hopelessness of 2020. Indeed, there are shades of Superman II. The price Diana pays for bringing back her lost love is the loss of her invulnerability. Like Superman, she must chose between human love and the super powers she will need to save the world. But Donner’s great gift was for the clarity he needed to tell the elemental story of Superman and Lois Lane — aided in no small part by Mario Puzo’s screenplay.
Somewhere along the line, Jenkins lost the plot. Wonder Woman never loses all of her power, never has to taste to taste human vulnerability and solve problems only with her wits. Jenkins can still conjure up a good set piece, such as the Fury Road-inspired riff where Diana and Steve drive a taxi to take on a column of armored vehicles. But it lacks emotional resonance because the movie can’t find the courage to commit to the bit. Wonder Woman fans deserve better.
WTF WW? Wonder Woman 1984 Crashes the Invisible Jet
In America, it was the worst of times, but inside the multiplex, it was the best of times. Mega-blockbusters faltered, while an exceptional crop of small films excelled. There was never a week when there wasn’t something good playing on Memphis’ big screens. Here’s the Flyer‘s film awards for 2017.
Worst Picture: Transformers: The Last Knight
There was a crap-flood of big budget failures in 2017. The Mummy was horrifying in the worst way. Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales sank the franchise. There was an Emoji Movie for some reason. What set Michael Bay’s nadir apart from the “competition” was its sneering contempt for the audience. I felt insulted by this movie. Everyone involved needs to take a step back and think about their lives.
Zeitgiestiest: Ingrid Goes West
In the first few years of the decade, our inner worlds were reshaped by social media. In 2017, social media reshaped the real world. No film better understood this crucial dynamic, and Aubrey Plaza’s ferociously precise performance as an Instagram stalker elevates it to true greatness.
Most Recursive: The Disaster Artist
James Franco’s passion project is a great film about an awful film. He is an actor dismissed as a lightweight doing a deep job directing a film about the worst director ever. He does a great job acting as a legendarily bad actor. We should be laughing at the whole thing, but somehow we end up crying at the end. It’s awesome.
Overlooked Gem:Blade Runner 2049
How does a long-awaited sequel to one of the greatest sci-fi films of all time, directed by one of the decade’s best directors, co-starring a legendary leading man and the hottest star of the day, end up falling through the cracks? Beats me, but if you like Dennis Villaneuve, Harrison Ford, Ryan Gosling, smart scripts, and incredible cinematography, and you didn’t see this film, rectify your error
Best Scene: Wonder Woman in No Man’s Land
The most successful superhero movie of the year was Patty Jenkins’ Wonder Woman. Midway through the picture, our hero leads a company of soldiers across a muddy World War I battlefield. Assailed on every side by machine gun fire and explosions, Wonder Woman presses on, never wavering, never doubting, showing the fighting men what real inner strength looks like. In this moment, Gal Gadot became a hero to millions of girls.
Best Memphis Movie: Good Grief
Melissa Anderson Sweazy and Laura Jean Hocking’s documentary Good Grief rose above a highly competitive, seven-film Hometowner slate at Indie Memphis to sweep the feature awards. It is a delicate, touching portrait of a summer camp for children who have lost loved ones due to tragedy. Full disclosure: I’m married to one of the directors. Fuller disclosure: I didn’t have a damn thing to do with the success of this film.
MVP: Adam Driver
Anyone with eyes could see former Girls co-star Adam Driver was a great actor, but he came into his own in 2017 with a trio of perfect performances. First, he lost 50 pounds and went on a seven-day silent prayer vigil to portray a Jesuit missionary in Martin Scorsese’s Silence. Then he was Clyde Logan, the one-armed Iraq vet who helps his brother and sister rob the Charlotte Motor Speedway in Stephen Soderberg’s Logan Lucky. Finally, he was Kylo Ren, the conflicted villain who made Star Wars: The Last Jedi the year’s best blockbuster.
Best Editing: Baby Driver
Edgar Wright’s heist picture is equal parts Bullitt and La La Land. In setting some of the most spectacular car chases ever filmed to a mixtape of sleeper pop hits from across the decades, Wright and editor Jonathan Amos created the greatest long-form music video since “Thriller.”
Best Screenplay:The Big Sick Screenwriter Emily V. Gordon, and comedian Kumail Nanjiani turned the story of their unlikely (and almost tragic) courtship into the year’s best and most humane comedy.
Best Performance By A Nonhuman: Sylvio Bernardi, Sylvio
In this hotly contested category, 2014 winner Caesar, the ape commander of War For The Planet Of The Apes, was narrowly defeated by a simian upstart. Sylvio, co-directed by Memphian Kentucker Audley, is a low-key comedy about a mute monkey in sunglasses (played by co-director Albert Binny) who struggles to keep his dignity intact while breaking into the cutthroat world of cable access television. Sylvio speaks to every time you’ve felt like an awkward outsider.
Best Performance (Honorable Mention):Kyle MacLachlan, Twin Peaks: The Return
David Lynch referred to his magnum opus as an 18-hour film, but Twin Peaks is a TV series to its core. The Return may be the crowning achievement of the current second golden age of television, but without MacLachlan’s beyond brilliant performance, Lynch’s take-no-prisoners surrealism would fly apart. I struggle to think of any precedent for MacLachlan’s achievement, playing at least four different versions of Special Agent Dale Cooper, whose identity gets fractured across dimensions as he tries to escape the clutches of the Black Lodge.
Best Performance: Francis McDormand,Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri
Sometimes the best film performers are the ones who do the least, and no one does nothing better than Francis McDormand. As the mother of a murdered daughter seeking the justice in the court of public opinion she was denied in the court of law, McDormand stuffs her emotions way down inside, so a clenched jaw or raised eyebrow lands harder than the most impassioned speech.
Best Director: Greta Gerwig,Lady Bird Lady Bird is destined to be a sentimental, coming-of-age classic for a generation of women. But it is not itself excessively sentimental. Greta Gerwig and star Saoirse Ronan are clear-eyed about their heroine’s failings and delusions as she navigates the treacherous psychic waters of high school senior year. Gerwig, known until now primarily as an actor, wrote and directed this remarkably insightful film that is as close to perfection as anything on the big screen in 2017.
Best Picture:Get Out — In prepping for my year-end list, I re-read my review for Get Out, which was positive but not gushing. Yet I have thought about this small, smart film from comedian Jordan Peele more than any other 2017 work. Peele took the conventions of horror films and shaped them into a deeply reasoned treatise on the insidious evil of white supremacy. Sometimes, being alive in 2017 seemed like living in The Sunken Place, and Peele’s film seems like a message from a saner time.
The problem with Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice is right there in the title.
Granted, there are a lot of problems with Zack Snyder’s $250 million epic of super conflict, but the biggest one is that DC and Warner Bros. have tried to mash two films into one. The first film is Batman v Superman: Batman (Ben Affleck) and Superman (Henry Cavill) are set on a collision course by the machinations of Lex Luthor (Jesse Eisenberg). The second film is Dawn of Justice — Batman discovers the existence of hidden “metahumans,” and gets the idea of uniting them into a super team — a “Justice League,” if you will — to protect the world from extraterrestrial threats. Both plots have the potential of forming the spine of a good movie, but, in a cowardly move that is all too typical of contemporary corporate filmmaking, the producers have tried to make a movie that is all things to all people and delivered a soggy mess.
Henry Cavill
Batman and Superman are supposed to be two very different characters. Batman is a brooding, tortured soul haunted by the loss of his parents. Superman’s disposition is sunny, optimistic, and virtuous, the result of some exceptional child rearing by Ma and Pa Kent in Smallville. Ben Affleck does a pretty good job as Batman/Bruce Wayne — at least he’s no George Clooney. Henry Cavill, on the other hand, plays Superman as a brooding, tortured soul, haunted in his dreams by the loss of his father (Kevin Costner) and the deaths of innocents in the climatic battle of Man of Steel. This isn’t Batman v Superman. It’s Batman v Batman. But the biggest miscalculation is Jesse Eisenberg playing Lex Luthor as a cross between Mark Zuckerberg in The Social Network and a twitchy, 12 Monkeys Brad Pitt, when he should have been portrayed as a megalomaniacal Elon Musk by someone other than Eisenberg. There’s more than a whiff of Heath Ledger’s Joker in this Luthor, another symptom of Batman Poisoning.
Ben Affleck
The women fare a little better. Amy Adams is inoffensive as Lois Lane, but she’s wearing the same grim countenance as everyone in this dark nightmare. When she and Cavill share the screen, there’s no hint of the explosive chemistry between Margot Kidder and Christopher Reeve that propelled the Richard Donner Superman. Gal Gadot makes a big impression as Wonder Woman, but there’s simply no reason for her to be introduced in this super mixture rather than in her own headlining picture. In the post-Katniss Everdeen era, there’s no excuse for Wonder Woman to play third fiddle.
Snyder’s direction is a cavalcade of bad decisions, beginning in the opening sequence with the baffling notion that we needed to see Bruce Wayne’s parents die again, when the second sequence, where we see the battle between Superman and General Zod (Michael Shannon) from Bruce Wayne’s point of view, is so much stronger. Multiple dream sequences and momentum-killing digressions, including one trip into a parallel universe, pad out the running time to a grueling 151 minutes. Snyder’s good at composing an interesting image, and the top-billed Bats/Supes throwdown delivers the goods before its emotion is dispelled by the completely unnecessary team up with Wonder Woman to fight Kryptonian mutant Doomsday.
To be fair to Snyder, who has produced one of the greatest comic book movies in 2009’s Watchmen adaptation, Batman films have been overstuffed messes since Tim Burton left the franchise. There hasn’t been a decent Superman movie since the Carter administration, and the decision to glom the Justice League origin story onto the Batman v Superman story probably came from the corporate level. But none of that excuses the fact that this film is just no fun. DC vs. Marvel is the closest thing to a sports rivalry in the geek world, and while DC fans are still showing up in droves, they now know what it feels like when their team is in a rebuilding year.
