Least competent criminals

It’s Good to Have a Hobby?

After authorities in Keene, New Hampshire, arrested Kelli Tedford, 23, on Feb. 21 for urinating on a variety of grocery products at the Monadnock Food Co-op, they discovered that her odd hobby goes back at least four years. NBC News reported that Tedford tainted produce and other items to the tune of $1,500 for the groceries and cleanup. Then police found online videos dating back to 2021 depicting Tedford in multiple locations, relieving herself on produce, surfaces, and other objects. She was charged with felony criminal mischief and released on her own recognizance — so she was able to piddle in public until her April 7, court date. [NBC News, 2/25/2025]

Alarming Headline

Mitchell Ring and his wife Jennifer Colin were flying from Melbourne, Australia, to Doha, Qatar, in mid-February when another passenger on their flight collapsed and died, The New York Times reported. The crew tried to revive the woman, but eventually opted to put her body in a wheelchair and tried to move it to business class, Ring said — but the chair wouldn’t fit up the aisle. That’s when Ring, who was sharing a four-seat row with Colin, was asked to move over so they could place the deceased woman in the seat next to him. Colin ended up moving to a different row: “I’m not a great flyer at the best of times,” she said. Ring endured the four remaining hours of the flight sitting next to the corpse, which was covered by a blanket. The International Air Transport Association confirmed that the flight attendants did the right thing; the deceased should be covered and strapped in with a seatbelt. [New York Times, 2/26/2025]

Least Competent Criminals

• Some people just can’t shut up. The California Department of Fish and Wildlife announced on Feb. 25 that it had settled a case of illegal possession of remains of an endangered species, KCRA-TV reported. The investigation began in late 2023 when two plainclothes CDFW officers were on a flight and struck up a conversation with a couple seated near them. The couple admitted to having a green sea turtle skull in their luggage — a species that is endangered and illegal to possess and transport in the U.S. The couple went on to brag about having taken a mountain lion, protected in California, and a family member’s possession of multiple taxidermied mountain lions, a wolverine, and wolves. After landing, the officers filed search warrants on the couple’s home in Chico, as well as the family member’s home in Napa. The searches turned up more illegal species. All three defendants reached plea deals and were convicted of various violations. [KCRA, 2/26/2025]

• Evelina Fabianski, 18, was looking for revenge (and the return of $700 she said she was owed) on Feb. 26 when she “decided to spray-paint and throw eggs at what she thought was [her ex-boyfriend’s] car,” said Volusia County (Florida) Sheriff’s deputies. Unfortunately, ClickOrlando.com reported, the car she and a minor friend covered with bright yellow paint belonged to a neighbor. Damage to the car amounted to about $5,000; Fabianski was charged with criminal mischief, contributing to the delinquency of a minor, possession of alcohol under age 21, and DUI. [ClickOrlando.com, 2/26/2025]

Crème de la Weird

In early February, the BBC reported on Feb. 26, doctors at the AIIMS hospital in Delhi, India, removed a 15kg parasitic twin from the abdomen of a 17-year-old boy. Parasitic twins form when one fetus partially develops while attached to the other. The young man had two fully formed legs, a pelvis, buttocks, and external genitalia protruding from his abdomen. Because of his condition, he had not been able to travel or do any physical activity, and he dropped out of school at the eighth grade. “A new world has opened up to me,” he said. The parasitic limbs were able to feel pain and changes in temperature. It took a team of doctors just two and a half hours to complete the surgery, and the patient has not experienced any complications. Dr. Asuri Krishna, who led the surgery, said, “Only 40 to 50 cases of parasitic twins have been documented in world medical literature.” [BBC, 2/26/2025]