Memphis Zoo – Page 13 – Memphis Flyer

A car on the miniature train that loops through the Memphis Zoo overturned on a curve, tumbling passengers onto the ground. Luckily, no one was seriously hurt since the locomotive just barely chugs along. But considering that this is a place crawling with lions, tigers, bears, alligators, pythons, and all sorts of deadly creatures, who would have thought the most dangerous thing at the zoo would be the children’s train?

Greg Cravens

In the latest development in the never-ending Zippin Pippin saga, the roller coaster may be donated to the city. Just one problem: They plan to keep the old cars. We hate to point out the obvious, but a roller coaster really needs two things: a track, and cars that roll along it.

Senator — make that former senator — John Ford is convicted of bribery charges as part of the Tennessee Waltz sting, though he somehow manages to escape other charges of extortion and intimidating witnesses. Ford used to be called “Teflon John” because he had an amazing ability to slip out of the most incredible messes, but it looks like this time something finally stuck to him. And next week, he travels to Nashville to face charges of fraud.

Memphis City Schools has a snappy slogan: “Every Student. Every Day. College Bound.” Trying to catch up, the Shelby County school system came up with a slogan of its own: “Preparing students for tomorrow today.” We’re sorry, but that just sounds all wrong. How can you prepare students for tomorrow today if you can’t even come up with a well-written slogan?

Collierville police nab three men who snatched iPods and other personal items from cars by resorting to a brilliant tactic: They pulled on car doors until they found one that was unlocked. Thieves are certainly getting awful clever.

A Memphis man calls the cops and tells them he was carjacked in a downtown parking lot. The police later find the car, and the driver tells them he didn’t steal it — the first guy loaned it to him. Turns out he’s telling the truth when the first guy ‘fesses up. Then both fellows admit they had been smoking crack all morning. Like we didn’t see that coming.

A controversy is brewing over Germantown’s official logo. The old version showed a horse and rider circled by a red “G.” The new version still has that “G” (green this time) but with an oak leaf above the words “Excellence. Every day.” We don’t know how much impact horses still have in a community that once had 15 mph speed-limit signs on Poplar for the four-legged creatures, but we do think the new logo looks like something you’d design for Vanderbilt.

The Memphis Zoo has asked Greg Cravens

Memphians to send get-well cards to their polar bear, Cranbeary, who broke a leg after tumbling into the deep moat in front of her compound. Zoo visitors say the female bear was pushed over the edge by her male companion during some roughhousing. We’ve had some dates that have ended up pretty much the same way.

Because of some unfortunate racial incidents, Sigma Alpha Epsilon is no longer an “official” fraternity at the University of Memphis and will not be “recognized” by the school for at least one year. We suppose that means SAE won’t be included in the school yearbooks, but since parties and other activities can continue at the fraternity’s privately owned house, we really can’t see how this will affect very much. If anything, the parties might be wilder than ever.