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News of the Weird: Week of 11/23/23

Awesome!

Tennessean Tami Manis is going to see her name in the 2024 edition of the Guinness World Records book after 34 years of hard work … not getting haircuts. United Press International reported on Aug. 31 that Manis’ mullet, measured at 5 feet, 8 inches long, earned her the prize in the female competitive mullet category. She had not cut the “party in the back” section of her hair since Feb. 9, 1990. “I’ve had people recognize me from 20 years ago because I’ve kept the same hairstyle,” she said. “This is amazing.” [UPI, 8/31/2023]

What Could Go Wrong?

Frick and Riverview parks in Pittsburgh have a problem: The deer population has grown to the point that the animals are dangerous to themselves and humans, Fox News reported. “With no natural predators, we are seeing an increase in car-deer collisions, relentless damage to our ecosystem and unnatural aggression toward pets and people,” the city’s website reads. What to do? The city is going to randomly pick 30 archers to participate in “a pilot program with archery-controlled hunts … during the 2023-2024 deer archery season,” the city announced. Hopeful hunters will be part of a lottery system, and final participants must have a clean background check and a deer permit. In addition, “the selected archers will be required to attend an accuracy test” and will be confined to a specific area of the park to hunt. Those who kill more than two deer in their area will be given preference for subsequent seasons, according to the city. Keep that orange vest handy. [Fox News, 9/5/2023]

Least Competent Criminal

Nicholas Coffey, 23, couldn’t resist bragging on social media about his “new” Mercedes-Benz on Sept. 2, which made it easier for cops to track him down, Fox News reported. Coffey and an accomplice used the stolen car to break into other vehicles on Deltona, Florida, residential streets during the early morning hours, then stopped at a gas station, where Coffey was captured on surveillance video. Volusia County detectives caught up with him the following morning and arrested him on multiple charges. [Fox News, 9/4/2023]

Clothing Optional

The Chicago Park District just couldn’t let the city’s nudists have a little fun on Labor Day. Early that morning, someone posted a sign at Loyola Beach along Lake Michigan declaring “Nude Beach Past This Sign,” WLS-TV reported. But, Alderman Maria Hadden scolded, the sign was unofficial and “cheeky,” and workers had it removed by that evening. Hadden did share that in 1932, Alderman George A. Williston proposed a resolution to create a nude sunbathing beach in the same location. Great minds … [WLS, 9/5/2023]

Inexplicable

Patrick Spina IV, 45, of Absecon, New Jersey, is facing criminal mischief charges after a bizarre series of stunts starting in June, WPVI-TV reported. After the Quality Inn in Galloway Township was targeted about a dozen times with a bright green dye launched into its outdoor pool by a drone, Sandra Woolston, the general manager, said she “had a meltdown” because the pool was largely unusable. In August, police got a call about a similar incident from a resident who was swimming in his pool when the dye was cast. The sea dye, normally used in search and rescue efforts, is damaging to swimming pools. Police got in touch with the FAA and learned the drone was operated by Spina. Detectives could not supply a motive but said they believed he was “pranking people.” “He was getting too happy with doing it,” Woolston said. [WPVI, 9/5/2023]

Saw That Coming

A 20-year-old unnamed Swiss man was taken to the hospital on Aug. 21 after trying not once, but twice, to put his face on the water nozzle at Geneva, Switzerland’s Jet d’Eau, the BBC reported. The attraction projects 110 gallons of water per second, reaching a height of 459 feet. His first attempt resulted in him being thrown backward; on his second try, he was thrown into the air and landed on a nearby cement walkway. He then dove into Lake Geneva, where officers found him and sought medical care for him. The company that operates the fountain intends to file a complaint against him for trespassing. [BBC, 8/23/2023]

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News of the Weird: Week of 11/16/23

News You Can Use

Back off that accelerator if you’re driving through Coffee City, Texas, about three hours north of Houston. Why? The town, with about 250 residents, has 50 full- and part-time police officers, KHOU-TV reported on Aug. 30. The town’s budget reveals that it collected more than $1 million in court fines in 2022, which were the result of more than 5,100 citations the officers wrote. And there’s a tantalizing twist: Most of Coffee City’s officers had been suspended, demoted, terminated, or discharged from previous law enforcement jobs, for reasons including excessive force, public drunkenness, and association with known criminals. “I’ve never seen anything like that in my professional career, and I’ve seen a lot,” said Greg Fremin, a retired Houston Police Department captain. But Coffee City’s police chief, JohnJay Portillo, disagrees: “There’s more to just what’s on paper,” he said. “I try to look at the good in everybody and I believe everybody deserves an opportunity.” Even so, the Texas Commission on Law Enforcement has an open investigation into the tiny community’s big law presence. [KHOU, 8/30/2023]

The Passing Parade

Lee Meyer of Neligh, Nebraska, altered his Ford sedan a few years back, cutting out half the roof and the passenger-side door and adding a farm gate, so that he could drive his Watusi bull in the Kolach Days Parade in Verdigre. (A Watusi bull, for you non-Nebraskans, has large, long horns, similar to a Texas Longhorn.) The bull, Howdy Doody, hitched another ride with Meyer on Aug. 30 on U.S. 275, but the Norfolk police weren’t having it, People reported: “The officer performed a traffic stop and addressed some traffic violations that were occurring with that particular situation,” Capt. Chad Reiman said. “I don’t know why he was doing it that day. I can honestly say that I haven’t seen anything like that before.” Meyer was asked to leave the city and return home with Howdy Doody. [People, 8/31/2023]

Don’t Mind Them

• In Fairfax County, Virginia, on Aug. 22, a man entered a 7-Eleven store and displayed a knife, which was the least interesting part of the robbery, Fox5DC-TV reported. The man, who was described as Hispanic, was wearing a black cowboy hat upon which perched two parrots. Another parrot was riding on the man’s shoulder. The suspect escaped in a blue SUV with an undisclosed amount of money, police said. [Fox5DC, 8/24/2023]

• And in northern England, an unnamed driver was issued a traffic offense report by police after he was observed motoring along the M62 with an African gray parrot on his shoulder, The Guardian reported on Aug. 30. “Animals should be in suitable carriers/restraints so that they don’t interfere with your ability to drive safely,” police posted on X. [Guardian, 8/30/2023]

Walk of Shame

“It’s just a biohazard issue,” the pilot told air traffic control. And indeed, the Delta Airlines Airbus A350 was forced to return to Atlanta after two hours in the air on Sept. 1 after a passenger suffered an “onboard medical emergency”: uncontrollable diarrhea that left the entire length of the aisle covered in fecal matter. The Guardian reported that passengers said the flight crew did everything they could to clean up the mess, including spraying it with scented disinfectant. But that merely made the cabin “smell of vanilla s–t,” one traveler said. Back in Atlanta, passengers, including the afflicted traveler, waited eight hours for the plane to be cleaned up and the aisle carpet to be replaced, then reboarded and were on their way to Barcelona — again. [Guardian, 9/6/2023]

Bright Idea

A 38-year-old man and a 55-year-old woman have been arrested in the central Shanxi province of China, China Daily reported, for digging a shortcut through the Great Wall of China. Local police were alerted to the damage on Aug. 24 and followed tracks from an excavator back to the suspects, who explained that they needed the shortcut to get back and forth to their construction jobs. The Great Wall is a UNESCO World Heritage Site, which has reportedly been “damaged beyond repair.” The two were charged with destroying a cultural relic. [China Daily, 9/4/2023]

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News of the Weird: Week of 10/12/23

It’s Come to This

New Yorkers have become accustomed (some grudgingly) to the ubiquitous odor of cannabis on city streets and in parks, the Associated Press reported. In fact, as spectator Diane Patrizio of Southampton, New York, stood in line at Court 17 at the U.S. Open, she remarked, “It’s everywhere. But what are you going to do?” Court 17, which is situated on the periphery of the Flushing Meadows complex, lies right next to Corona Park, and on Aug. 29, the court “definitely [smelled] like Snoop Dogg’s living room,” said player Alexander Zverev. “The whole court smells like weed.” In fact, eighth-seeded Maria Sakkari complained to the chair umpire. However, the USTA found no evidence that anyone inside the facility was smoking, and Sakkari said the odor didn’t affect her loss to Rebeka Masarova. “I mean, it’s something we cannot control because we’re in an open space,” Sakkari said. [AP, 8/29/2023]

News That Sounds Like a Joke

Barbara Haverly, 62, of Mount Dora, Florida, was running a routine errand this summer when things suddenly got out of hand, The Washington Post reported on Aug. 23. Haverly had stopped at the city library to return a book, but the line was rather long, so she dropped it into a drop box as she’d done many times before. But as she pulled out her hand, she felt a sharp pain in her left middle finger. The top of the finger, starting just below her fingernail, had been torn off. “I was in shock,” she said. Library staff called 911, and one employee got into the book box to retrieve the top of her finger. Doctors performed surgery but were unable to reattach the fingertip. Haverly is still dealing with the aftermath of the incident; she said she is depressed and can no longer do yoga or play the ukulele. Meanwhile, the library has placed a sign over the box that reads, “Please do not place your hand inside this book drop.” [Washington Post, 8/23/2023]

Irony

Two employees of television outlet Univision Chicago who were filming a piece about armed robberies in the Windy City were robbed at gunpoint around 5 a.m. on Aug. 28, The Washington Post reported. The reporter and photographer were in the Wicker Park neighborhood when an SUV and a sedan pulled up and three suspects “wearing ski masks and displaying firearms” jumped out. They took the photography equipment and personal items, returned to their cars and fled. The suspects are still at large; no injuries were reported. [Washington Post, 8/29/2023]

Unmanaged Expectations

Officials at the U.S. Military Academy at West Point hyped an event scheduled for Aug. 28, tweeting the night before and livestreaming the festivities a la Geraldo Rivera: the opening of a time capsule from the late 1820s. The Washington Post reported that the box was installed at the base of a monument to a Polish military engineer who aided the U.S. during the Revolutionary War. But when archaeologist Paul Hudson lifted the lid, his high hopes flew away like dust in the wind. “The box didn’t quite meet expectations,” he said. Hudson found … silt. However, upon further examination, Hudson uncovered a small and puzzling treasure: six silver American coins dated between 1795 and 1828 and one Erie Canal commemorative medal. “When I first found these, I thought … it would have been great to have found these on stage,” he said. Hudson said he would analyze the remaining sediment to find out whether other items inside had been destroyed by moisture. [Washington Post, 8/31/2023]

Build the Wall!

No, not that wall. In Norway’s Arctic region, workers are rebuilding a reindeer fence along the country’s border with Russia because the animals keep wandering over the line to find better pastures for grazing. The barrier is 93 miles long; only about 4 miles require repair, the Associated Press reported. But the work is challenging because workers cannot step into Russian territory lest they be charged with illegal entry. Russia has charged Norway huge fines for the days the reindeer grazed in a natural reserve. The work is expected to be completed by Oct. 1. [AP, 8/24/2023]

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News of the Weird: Week of 10/05/23

The Tech Revolution

The California Public Utilities Commission voted in early August to allow Cruise and Waymo to offer paid driverless rides to customers during the day, The New York Times reported. On Aug. 15, as Paul Harvey, 74, looked on, a Cruise vehicle in San Francisco drove into a city paving project and became stuck in wet concrete. “I thought it was funny,” Harvey said. “It illustrated how creepy and weird the whole thing is to me.” Rachel Gordon with the San Francisco Department of Public Works noted that no one was hurt, but added, “That portion of the road has to be repaved at Cruise’s expense.” Paul Leonardi, a professor of technology management at the University of California, Santa Barbara, chalked up the experience to a teaching moment: “It needs to experience a diverse set of use cases so it can learn, and driving into wet concrete is one of those use cases.” [NY Times, 8/17/2023]

Clothing Optional

At Stoke Fruit Farm on Hayling Island in England, the sunflowers have been in full bloom for several weeks. The colorful fields offer a perfect background for photo shoots, but, the BBC reported, the farm has seen an “increase of reports of naked photography taking place” since July 28. “People are having fun and taking pictures for their Instagram but we just ask that they keep their clothes on,” said Sam Wilson, who runs the site. In an Aug. 11 Facebook post, the attraction cautioned that “this must not happen during our public sessions please.” One commenter said her son “got a right eyeful” after stumbling across a woman wearing just a thong. “Should have seen his face!” [BBC, 8/17/2023]

It’s (Not) a Mystery

When the European Space Agency shared a composite photo taken by the James Webb Telescope in late July, highlighting two actively forming stars, another shape in the photo caught the attention of Earth-bound gazers: an orange formation in the shape of a question mark. Kai Noeske, ESA communication program officer, explained to NPR what scientists think the shape is: “a group or a chance alignment of two or three galaxies. The upper part of the question mark looks like a distorted spiral galaxy, maybe merging with a second galaxy.” Galaxy mergers result in “all kinds of beautiful shapes and structures,” said Macarena Garcia Marin, a Webb project scientist. They are “a normal phase in the life and evolution of galaxies.” [NPR, 8/17/2023]

Questionable Judgment

An unnamed man called his dangerous stunt “a joke” after being arrested in Ostrobothnia, Finland, Sky News reported on Aug. 9. The man allegedly stored 26 pounds of dynamite in his friend’s two cars before calling the owner and telling him. The owner wasn’t laughing: He alerted police, who evacuated nearby buildings. “In addition to the dynamite, detonators were also confiscated from the cars,” said Tony Rauma, detective chief inspector with the Ostrobothnia Police. The jokester told police he did not intend to blow up the cars, and links to terrorism have been ruled out. [Sky News, 8/9/2023]

Bright Idea

Officials in New Delhi, India, are preparing for the G20 summit next week, and no detail has been left unaddressed, Reuters reported. For example: Rhesus monkeys are a menace on many of the city’s streets, often attacking pedestrians. The monkeys cannot be harmed or removed by law, so the government has installed life-size cutouts of langurs — bigger primates with black faces — around the city to scare the monkeys away. The New Delhi Municipal Council has also employed “30 to 40” people who mock the langurs’ sounds so that the monkeys will believe they are real. “We … are already seeing a positive impact,” said Satish Upadhyay, the vice-chairman of the NDMC. [Reuters, 8/31/2023]

Send your weird news items with subject line WEIRD NEWS to WeirdNewsTips@amuniversal.com.

News of the Weird is now a podcast on all major platforms! To find out more, visit newsoftheweirdpodcast.com.

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News of the Weird: Week of 09/28/23

Police Report

In news from Paris, an “experienced climber” got to the top of the Eiffel Tower early on Aug. 17 and parachuted off before guards could stop him, The Guardian reported. The unnamed man landed safely after the leap from about 1,100 feet and was promptly arrested for endangering the lives of others. “This kind of irresponsible action puts people working at or near the tower in danger,” scolded SETE, the tower’s management company. [Guardian, 8/17/2023]

Least Competent Criminal

Sure, Mountain Dew has been compared to battery acid, but one suspect thought a can of the stuff could save her from being fingered as a killer. Fox35-TV reported that on Aug. 5, Nichole Maks, 35, was charged with first-degree murder in the death of her 79-year-old roommate, Michael Cerasoli. Cerasoli was discovered beaten and stabbed in the home they shared in Daytona Beach, Florida, on July 1. Officers tracked down Maks around 3:30 the next morning at a Krystal’s restaurant, where she had blood on the side of her leg and part of her shirt had been torn or cut away. As they approached, she dropped a knife and hammer she’d been carrying; she told officers she often carried such items. Police said that as they questioned her about her roommate, she became “agitated” and asked for a drink; they gave her a can of Diet Mountain Dew, which she poured over her body and hair, hoping to eliminate any evidence on her person. Unsurprisingly, that stunt didn’t work, and her DNA was found on the knife used to kill Cerasoli. She currently resides at the Volusia County Jail. [Fox35, 8/14/2023]

The Weirdo-American Community

TikToker Michaela Witter was on Day 20 of a series she was posting about “100 solo dates” — activities like reading in the park or buying herself flowers. On Aug. 7, as she browsed in Barnes & Noble in Burbank, California, Witter inadvertently captured a stalker on video as he followed her, kneeled behind her, and sniffed her (and another woman) repeatedly. Fox News reported that Witter’s post unleashed a torrent of similar experiences — even with the same stalker. “Bro that same man was crouching behind me and following me thru Marshalls today,” one commenter posted. “The same thing happened to me at Ralph’s in Burbank,” another said. One TikToker had the same experience in the same bookstore. Glendale police arrested Calese Carron Crowder, 37, on Aug. 11, but a judge placed him on probation and released him on Aug. 15. Los Angeles County Jail records show Crowder has been booked there 41 times. [Fox News, 8/16/2023]

Ummmmmm

• Street performer Lino Tomasen, 32, of Havana, Cuba, retired from boxing after a blow delivered to his opponent fractured the man’s skull and killed him instantly, he told Reuters. Tomasen gave all his fight winnings to that man’s family and took to the streets, where the “Ironman” now beats on himself and collects tips. He uses a sledgehammer to slam his wrists, elbows, and forearms for horrified onlookers, but seems to be unharmed by the abuse. “It’s all real, nothing fabricated,” said Edward Carbonell, who watched Tomasen’s “show.” “I want to be remembered as someone who pushed the limits of what was possible,” Tomasen said. [Reuters, 8/15/2023]

• At a sunset “furmeet” on Aug. 12 in Huntington Beach, California, one furry took offense when a man in street clothes started filming the spectacle on his phone, the Toronto Sun reported. Someone in a black wolf costume asked the filmer to stop, then amplified his message with a megaphone: “Leave or we will make you leave.” When the filmer didn’t budge, the wolf hit him over the head with the megaphone. Others jumped into the brawl, which was finally broken up by California State Parks officers. [Toronto Sun, 8/16/2023]

Send your weird news items with subject line WEIRD NEWS to WeirdNewsTips@amuniversal.com.

News of the Weird is now a podcast on all major platforms! To find out more, visit newsoftheweirdpodcast.com.

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News of the Weird: Week of 09/07/23

Bright Idea

Pinecrest, Florida, has a peculiar problem: peacocks. The New York Times reported on Aug. 9 that the city has been overrun with the large, loud, destructive birds, which peck at roofs and cars and relieve themselves all over driveways. The solution? Peacock vasectomies. Dr. Don J. Harris, the veterinarian who will snip the feisty birds, said they’re “bona fide polygamists. We’re going to catch one peacock and probably stop seven females from reproducing. It’s going to have an exponential benefit.” County commissioners approved the plan, and city officials designated $7,500 a month to cover trapping and surgery. [NY Times, 8/9/2023]

Nature Gone Wild

Peggy Jones, 64, of Silsbee, Texas, got a little too close to nature for comfort on July 25 as she and her husband did yard work on their property. The New York Times reported that out of the blue, a snake fell from the sky, wrapped itself around Jones’ forearm and started to squeeze. “I immediately screamed and started swinging my arm to shake the snake off,” she said. “I was screaming, ‘Jesus, help me, please, Jesus, help me!’” But the snake hissed and struck at her face, sometimes hitting her glasses. Then, as Jones struggled, a hawk swooped down and tried to grab the snake, which it had dropped from on high, from her arm. As it wrestled with the snake, its talons slashed into Jones’ arm. Finally, the hawk got hold of the snake and flew off. She said the whole incident probably took only 15 or 20 seconds, but afterward, “I looked down at my arm and it was totally covered in blood.” Jones’ husband, Wendell, saw his wife screaming and running in a zigzag pattern: “By the time I got to her, she was pretty hysterical,” he said. Doctors said most of her wounds were caused by the hawk rather than the snake. Jones says that she is healing physically but is still having nightmares about the incident. [NY Times, 8/9/2023]

Irony

An instructor at a driving school in Lakewood, Colorado, won’t be getting a passing grade after crashing a car into the school’s front window on Aug. 8 — just under a sign that says “Learn To Drive.” KDFW-TV reported that the driver, who was trying to park a Hyundai Tucson in front of the Community Driving School, was cited for a traffic violation. Police said there was only one minor injury. [KDFW, 8/9/2023]

Field Report

Divers Ken Fleming and Doug Bishop were searching for clues in missing persons cold cases on Aug. 6 in Doral, Florida, when they stumbled upon an investigatory treasure chest, WSVN-TV reported. “We realized we had 32 cars underwater,” Fleming said. The divers work as volunteers and have a huge database of missing persons. “We have 40 that we’re targeting right now of folks that disappeared, anywhere from two or three months ago to 30, 40 years ago,” he said. Statewide, Fleming said they have found 60 submerged cars that may be linked to crimes. They’ll work with the county to get the vehicles removed and collect and deliver any pertinent information from them. [WSVN, 8/6/2023]

But, Why?

A mysterious man is taking pacifiers out of the mouths of babes in Harlow, England, Sky News reported. The incidents started in February, with the most recent one taking place on Aug. 7. One of the children was also assaulted. The suspect is a young, slim white man with brown eyes and yellow teeth, police said; they are soliciting information from anyone who has any knowledge of the cagey Dummy Bandit (our moniker, not theirs). “As a parent myself, I understand the level of concern,” said chief inspector Paul Austin. [Sky News, 8/9/2023]

Americans Abroad

Sigh. Security guards at the Eiffel Tower in Paris discovered two American tourists sleeping near the top of the structure on Aug. 14 as they prepared to open to visitors, Yahoo! News reported. Paris prosecutors said the two dodged security the night before and “appear to have got stuck because of how drunk they were.” Firefighters were dispatched to collect the men, who were questioned by police; Eiffel Tower management company Sete said it would file a criminal complaint, although the pair didn’t “pose any apparent threat.” [Yahoo! News, 8/15/2023]

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News of the Weird: Week of 08/17/23

It’s Come to This

Cedric Lodge, 55, and his wife, Denise, 63, of Goffstown, New Hampshire, were indicted in federal court on June 14th after it was revealed that they allegedly were stealing and selling human body parts, the Associated Press reported. Lodge was the manager of the Harvard Medical School morgue until May 6th, when he was fired. He and his wife offered a shopping opportunity at the morgue, where buyers could pick which donated remains they wanted. The Lodges would then take the items home and ship them through the mail. The parts included heads, brains, skin, and bones. Three others were indicted: Katrina Maclean, 44, of Salem, Massachusetts; Joshua Taylor, 46, of West Lawn, Pennsylvania; and Matthew Lampi, 52, of East Bethel, Minnesota. Prosecutors say they were part of a nationwide network of people who buy and sell human remains. Harvard called the actions “morally reprehensible.” [AP, 6/15/2023]

Smooth Reaction

When Martin Trimble, 30, tried to rob a convenience store in Durham, England, in May, the shop owner got the best of him: He lowered the store’s steel shutter, trapping Trimble on his back half in and half out, and waited for authorities to arrive. Once Trimble realized he was pinned to the ground, Fox News reported, he popped open one of the beers he’d tried to steal and drank it as he waited to be arrested. Trimble pleaded guilty on June 16th to attempted robbery and possession of a knife and was sentenced to three years in jail. [Fox News, 6/18/2023]

Bright Idea

Self-pitying Belgian TikToker David Baerten, 45, has a morbid sense of humor — or a fragile ego. According to Sky News, Baerten and his family decided to “prank” his friends by faking his own death because he felt “unappreciated” by them. The funeral, which took place in early June near Liege, drew a crowd of friends and family, who were shocked when a helicopter landed nearby and Baerten stepped out. “What I see in my family often hurts me. I never get invited to anything. Nobody sees me,” Baerten said. “That’s why I wanted to give them a life lesson.” [Sky News, 6/14/2023]

Weird Science

KTVX-TV reported on June 21st that snow in the mountains of Utah is turning pink, red, and orange — what scientists call “watermelon snow.” Experts said the colored snow results from blooming green algae, which is found in mountain ranges. “The snow algae produce a pigment that basically darkens their cells,” said Scott Hotaling, an assistant professor at Utah State University’s department of watershed sciences. Basically, the algae turn colors to protect themselves. One young visitor said the snow turned his shoes orange. “I thought that was pretty cool,” he said. [KTVX, 6/20/2023]

You Had One Job

The town of Stuart, Iowa, needed a new water tower to handle its growing population, according to KCRG-TV. But when residents saw the name painted on one side, they cringed. Rather than STUART, the tower was painted with START. Mayor Dick Cook called the social media attention about the misspelling “hilarious,” and the tower has been repainted. [KCRG, 6/21/2023]

Maybe the Dingo Did Eat Your Baby

On K’gari beach (formerly Fraser Island) in Australia, a 10-year-old boy was bitten and dragged under the water by a dingo on June 16th, The Guardian reported. Not two weeks earlier, another dingo was euthanized after biting multiple tourists, including a French woman who was bitten on her posterior as she sunbathed. In the most recent event, the boy’s older sister rescued him, and he was treated for puncture wounds to his shoulder and arms. “These animals are capable of inflicting serious harm … some are quite brazen and are not fleeing when yelled at or when someone brandishes a stick,” said ranger Danielle Mansfield. “Children and teenagers must be within arm’s reach of an adult at all times.”
[Guardian, 6/21/2023]

News of the Weird is now a podcast on all major platforms! To find out more, visit newsoftheweirdpodcast.com.

NEWS OF THE WEIRD
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News of the Weird: Week of 08/03/23

Aquaman, Is That You?

A Florida scientist who calls himself “Dr. Deep Sea” resurfaced on June 9th … after spending 100 days underwater. CNN reported that Joseph Dituri, 55, a biomedical engineer who teaches at the University of South Florida, began his research mission on March 1st, when he dove to the bottom of the Emerald Lagoon in Key Largo, Florida. Dituri stayed in Jules’ Undersea Lodge, an underwater hotel, during his record-setting stint below the surface, and he hopes that the data gleaned from all that time underwater will help researchers understand the effects of compression on the human body. “My greatest hope is that I have inspired a new generation of explorers and researchers to push past all boundaries,” Dituri said in a news release. [CNN.com, 6/11/2023]

Time To Buy a Lottery Ticket

Ripleys.com (of “Believe It or Not!” fame) claims that orange lobsters are even more rare — to the tune of 1-in-30-million — than the blue variety. So one can imagine the surprise of Captain Peter Pray, a lobsterman working in Casco Bay near Portland, Maine, when he caught his third orange lobster in a week on June 15th. WGME-13 reported that Pray, who is one of the lobster suppliers for Harbor Fish Market, made his latest catch, a female, using the same trap with which he caught the others, which were male. A tweet from Harbor Fish Market asked the question on everyone’s mind: “What’s up Casco Bay? What kind of lobster magic is happening in your waters?” [WGME-13, 6/15/2023]

Awesome!

Visitors to the Rembrandt House Museum in Amsterdam can now bring home a new, and permanent, souvenir of their visit. The Associated Press reported that tattoo artist Henk Schiffmacher and others are doing a residency within the museum called “A Poor Man’s Rembrandt,” where tourists can get inked with sketches by the famous artist. Schiffmacher calls it “highbrow to lowbrow. And it’s great that these two worlds can visit one another.” The tattoos cost between $54 and $270. [AP, 6/19/2023]

Wait, What?

Employees of Taqueria Garibaldi restaurants in northern California got an unusual — and unorthodox — perk during work hours, USA Today reported. Employees testified in court that a person who identified as a priest was called in to hear workers’ “confessions.” “The priest urged workers to ‘get their sins out’ and asked if they had stolen from the employer, been late for work, had done anything to harm their employer, or if they had bad intentions toward their employer,” according to a release from the U.S. Department of Labor. But the Catholic Diocese of Sacramento said it could find no connection between the alleged priest and the diocese. An investigation found that the restaurants had denied overtime pay and threatened employees with retaliation, among other “sins,” and the owners were ordered to pay $140,000 in damages and back wages. [USA Today, 6/21/2023]

The Tech Revolution

In an office building in Durham, North Carolina, nine scientists are hard at work in Duke University’s Smart Toilet Lab, The News & Observer reported. Sonia Grego told the paper that she and her colleagues “are addressing a very serious health problem” — gut health. The toilets in the lab move poop into a specialized chamber before flushing it away. There, cameras are placed for image processing, and the resulting data can give doctors insights into a patient’s gut health. Startup Coprata is testing pilot versions of the smart toilets in a few dozen households; after the data is gathered, users can access it themselves on a smartphone app. “The knowledge of people’s bowel habits empowers individuals to make lifestyle choices that improve their gut health,” Grego said. [News & Observer, 6/15/2023]

Insult to Injury

Mark Dicara of Lake Barrington, Illinois, allegedly shot himself in the leg on June 12th while dreaming of a home invasion, Insider reported. Dicara grabbed his .357 Magnum and fired — which instantly brought him to consciousness. There was no intruder in the home. Police found him in bed with a “significant amount of blood.” He was charged with possession of a firearm without a valid Firearm Owners Identification card and reckless discharge of a firearm. [Insider, 6/15/2023]

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NEWS OF THE WEIRD
© 2023 Andrews McMeel Syndication.
Reprinted with permission.
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Categories
Fun Stuff News of the Weird

News of the Weird: Week of 07/13/23

Some Things Beg Certainty

Relatives were mourning Bella Montoya, 76, at her wake in Ecuador on June 9 when they heard strange sounds coming from the coffin. “There were about 20 of us there,” the woman’s son Gilberto Barbera said. “After about five hours of the wake, the coffin started to make sounds.” The supposedly deceased had been declared dead in the Martin Icaza Hospital in Babahoyo earlier that day, but that evening, “my mom was wrapped in sheets and hitting the coffin, and when we approached we could see that she was breathing heavily,” Barbera said. Montoya was rushed back to the hospital, but the Associated Press reported that she was intubated and was not expected to recover. Ecuador’s Health Ministry launched an investigation into the incident. [AP, 6/12/2023]

A Bear’s Gotta Eat

Workers for American Plate Glass in Sunapee, New Hampshire, learned an important lesson about locking up their valuables on June 14, but it wasn’t at the hands of the typical thief, and the valuables weren’t the usual tools or construction materials. Curtis Fidler was working on-site when he noticed movement in his peripheral vision: “I turn and it was a bear nonchalantly just having lunch in the front seat of the truck.” The bear enjoyed all of the snacks it could find, left the truck, and disappeared into the woods. Fidler FaceTimed his mother-in-law Melinda Scott, who watched the encounter live and later told WHDH-7 News that “[t]here is not a single scratch on the box truck. He did no damage. He just had lunch and took a nap.” [WHDH-7, 6/15/2023]

The Agony of the Heat

The hopes of Hong Kong residents were slightly deflated on June 9, as a long-awaited art installation in Victoria Harbour lost steam. Dutch artist Florentijn Hofman’s giant rubber ducky installation, which tours cities around the world and captured the affections of Bangkok residents when it visited there back in 2013, returned to the city last month, this time with two giant rubber duckies, which the artist said would bring “double luck.” Unfortunately, Yahoo News reported that rising temperatures put one ducky — and residents — at risk. The “rubber duck skin had become strained because the hot weather has caused air pressure to rise,” organizers said in a statement. They deflated the duck as a precaution. [Yahoo News, 6/3/2023]

Two Paws Up, Way Up

Theatergoers in Thailand have a new pet-friendly place to bring their furry friends. Yahoo News reported that the country’s largest movie theater chain, Major Cineplex Group, started offering weekend showtimes for patrons who want to bring Fluffy or Fido with them. Of course, there’s a catch: Pets must weigh under 11 pounds and either wear a diaper or be kept in a carrier. Visitors turned out in droves for a pets-welcome showing of The Little Mermaid, cosplaying their creature companions as Sebastian the crab and Ariel the mermaid. Not everyone’s a fan, however; as one former resident said, “It’s so ridiculous dogs are not allowed in [most Bangkok] parks but they can go to a movie or cafe. What comes next, you bring your dog or cat to a massage parlor?” [Yahoo News, 6/10/2023]

I Hope That Someone Gets My …

Almost exactly 34 years after it was thrown into the sea in Newfoundland, a message in a bottle was recovered in Quebec. “I was so excited. I mean, what I’m looking for all the time is a note in a bottle,” Trudy Shattler told SaltWire of her discovery. After some social media sleuthing, she learned that the bottle belonged to one Gilbert Hamlyn, who was known for writing messages on cigarette packs, stuffing them in bottles, and setting them to sea. Sadly, Hamlyn passed away two years ago, but his son Rick was all too happy to hear of the bottle’s recovery, and intends to place it at his father’s grave. [SaltWire, 6/13/2023]

Money Movers

Police in Clintonville, Ohio, are on the hunt after brazen thieves used a U-Haul truck to rip a safe out of a drive-thru ATM in the early hours of June 15. WCMH-TV reported that the suspects used a chain secured to the truck to pull the safe free of the machine, then absconded in a getaway vehicle, leaving the U-Haul behind. Authorities had no description of the other vehicle or how much money the thieves stole, but they believe at least two suspects were involved. [WCMH-TV, 6/15/2023]

NEWS OF THE WEIRD
© 2023 Andrews McMeel Syndication.
Reprinted with permission.
All rights reserved.

Categories
Fun Stuff News of the Weird

News of the Weird: Week of 07/06/23

Awesome!

Ethan Brown, 16, a junior at Jericho High School on Long Island, New York, is a hero among his classmates, the New York Post reported. Brown argued before the school board in March that his highly ranked school had 186 days in session — six more than the state’s required 180 — and that summer vacation ought to begin on Friday, May 26. “I was nervous, especially at first,” Brown said. “I almost sat back down before speaking but I’m glad I didn’t.” He noted that on a stormy day in February, the school did not close, and not a single snow day was used during the year. Superintendent Hank Grisham said Brown “did an absolutely incredible job. There is no requirement to give … snow days back to staff or the kids.” But the board was moved, and a day off was granted — dubbed the Ethan Brown Snow Day. “I’m getting a lot of thank-yous,” Brown said. In his upcoming senior year, he’s in line to take over the editor-in-chief position at the school newspaper. [NY Post, 5/25/2023]

Thong and Cheek

Protesters at the Massachusetts Statehouse bared more than their souls as they demonstrated against climate change on June 15, according to an NBC-10 Boston report. Shouts began to rain down from the public gallery just after 1 p.m. from eight members of Extinction Rebellion, an international environmental movement, followed by a warning: “We are going to be mooning you. … You can look away if you wish.” At that point, the octet turned their backs on the senators and dropped trou, revealing pink thongs and bare buttocks emblazoned with the words “stop passing gas.” The protesters continued with chants of “You’re a senator, not an ass, why are you still passing gas,” and “Butts out for climate” for about an hour before they were arrested and escorted out of the chamber. [NBC 10 Boston, 6/15/2023]

Reunited and It Feels So Good

• A first edition of George Orwell’s 1984 has been returned to the library … 65 years late. UPI reported that the Multnomah County Library in Portland recently received the return from an 86-year-old patron. The patron attached a note to the book, explaining that they meant to return it in 1958 after checking it out as a Portland State University student — they just “never got around to it.” But talk about excellent timing: The library just went fine-free. [UPI, 6/14/2023]

• Sheriff’s detectives in Kanawha County, West Virginia, made an odd discovery while executing a search warrant on an impounded vehicle in February: a 1965 class ring from Needham B. Broughton High School in Raleigh, North Carolina, bearing the initials “M.P.” Their investigation determined the owner was one Michael Pedneau, who told the Charleston (West Virginia) Gazette-Mail that he only vaguely recalls losing the bling some 50 years ago, perhaps on a trip to Princeton, West Virginia. “There’s probably 40 or 50 of us [classmates] who get together monthly for lunch,” Pedneau said. “We’re all old, so we enjoy swapping stories, and this is one I’ll share with them. I’ll show them the ring and we’ll have some fun around it.” [Charleston Gazette-Mail, 6/13/2023]

Up in Smoke

A dispensary in Baltimore faces fines for blowing smoke … literally. WMAR-2 in Baltimore reported that the Cookies dispensary opened May 27, only to be shut down less than a week later after a surprise inspection revealed a laundry list of violations, including “large plumes of medical cannabis smoke being blown from a large gun apparatus into the mouths of persons outside the dispensary,” according to the suspension notice. Cookies is part of a franchise, and Cookies San Francisco was the first to utilize a “Flame Thrower” smoke blower, created by Jeff Dick of Colorado. The blower has since become part of the Cookies brand. [WMAR-2, 6/15/2023]

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News of the Weird is now a podcast on all major platforms! To find out more, visit newsoftheweirdpodcast.com.

NEWS OF THE WEIRD
© 2023 Andrews McMeel Syndication.
Reprinted with permission.
All rights reserved.