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News of the Weird: Week of 03/30/23

Least Competent Criminal

Early on the morning of Feb. 5, 20-year-old Lantz Kurtz broke into a gas station in Palm Coast, Florida, and stole multiple items. He exited via the front door, apparently unaware that he’d left a big clue behind: his debit card, Fox35-TV reported. Officers responding to the alarm found the card and tracked down Kurtz, who told them he had intended to come back to the store and pay for the items. But Sheriff Rick Staly wasn’t having it: “Leaving a debit card behind does not absolve you from theft or committing a burglary,” he said. [Fox35, 2/8/2023]

Crime Spree

Robert Powers, 37, managed to terrorize multiple citizens of Altoona, Pennsylvania, on Feb. 6, WTAJ-TV reported. He allegedly broke into four different homes, telling one woman as he covered her mouth, “I’m Batman.” At the next home, he choked a man, went through his pockets, and held him hostage with a pocketknife. Next, he turned the man’s gas stove on and forced him into his truck, heading across town at speeds of more than 100 mph before crashing into a Jeep. Powers then kicked open the door of a nearby home and repeatedly asked, “Why’d you do this, mom?” as he walked through the residence. Finally, at the last crime scene, police were able to subdue Powers, who admitted he may have ingested meth or bath salts. [WTAJ, 2/7/2023]

Bright Idea

Jose Ruben Nava, former director of the zoo in Chilpancingo, Mexico, is under fire after officials learned that he slaughtered four pygmy goats to serve at the zoo’s year-end dinner, MSN reported. Fernando Ruiz Gutierrez, director of wildlife for the state’s environment department, said serving the goat meat “put the health of the people who ate them at risk because these animals were not fit for human consumption.” Nava is also accused of trading a zebra for tools. He was let go from his position in January after the death of a deer at the zoo. [MSN, 2/2/2023]

Irony

A 61-year-old butcher working at the Sheung Shui Slaughterhouse in Hong Kong died at the hands — er, hooves — of a pig he was trying to slaughter on Jan. 20, CNN reported. The unnamed man was knocked to the ground by the struggling pig, which had revived after a shot from a stun gun, and suffered a wound from a meat cleaver. Strangely, police said, the man’s wounds were to his hand and foot; a cause of death had not been released. The Labour Department extended its “deepest sympathy to his family.” [CNN, 1/21/2023]

Animal Antics

The Wyandotte (Michigan) Police Department opened an investigation in January after an officer was suspected of stealing another officer’s lunch while he was out of the room. The Today show reported that Officer Barwig was called away from the break room to assist in the jail; when he returned, K-9 Officer Ice was seen licking his chops, and Barwig’s sandwich was nowhere to be seen. “Officer Ice has invoked his Fifth Amendment right to remain silent and quite frankly is not cooperating with the investigation,” the department posted on its Facebook page. Later, dozens of attorneys offered to represent Ice in court, but the department decided not to pursue discipline or criminal charges. [Today, 1/23/2023]

Can’t Possibly Be True

Jesse and Deedee O’Dell of Tulsa, Oklahoma, normally spend around $10 for their Starbucks coffees, but on Jan. 7, their bill was considerably more, KOKI-TV reported. A few days later, when Deedee tried to use the same card at a mall, it was declined. That’s when the couple discovered that Starbucks had given itself a $4,444.44 tip on their $10.90 bill. They contacted the district manager, who said there’d been an “issue” with the network, and they received two checks to cover the enormous gratuity — but both checks bounced. While they wait for replacement checks, they’ve had to cancel a family vacation, “and the tickets are nonrefundable,” said Jesse. A Starbucks representative said new checks are on the way and the mistake was caused by “possible human error.” [KOKI, 2/7/2023]

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News of the Weird: Week of 03/23/23

Police Report

Murphy the ape statue was an “icon” at Design Emporium and Antiques in Kensington, Maryland — until he was stolen in the wee hours of Jan. 4, the New York Post reported. Murphy, made of cast iron and weighing 200 pounds, was hurriedly loaded into the bed of an “older model Chevrolet Colorado Z71,” authorities said, as seen on a surveillance video. The suspect “pulled right up and had the bolt cutters ready” to cut the cable securing the sculpture. Shop owner Kristina Jamgochian said people would take selfies with Murphy. “It’s my business and I feel violated,” she said. A $10,000 reward awaits anyone who helps recover the gorilla. [New York Post, 1/31/2023]

Oops!

A 66-year-old female patient at the Glen Oaks Alzheimer’s Special Care Center in Urbandale, Iowa, had suffered a slow decline and was moved into hospice care in late December. On Jan. 3, CBS News reported, the woman was pronounced dead, and the funeral home was called. She was placed in a body bag and transported to the Ankeny Funeral Home & Crematory, where workers unzipped the bag and got a shock: They “observed [the resident’s] chest moving and she gasped for air,” a report from the Iowa Department of Inspections and Appeals detailed. Responding EMS workers were able to get a pulse and monitor breathing, but she had no eye movement or verbal response. She was returned to the care facility, where she died two days later with her family at her side. The home is facing $10,000 in fines. [CBS News, 2/2/2023]

New York City recently unveiled the Long Island Railroad’s new Grand Central Madison terminal, which was built to the tune of $11 billion. But, NBC New York reported on Feb. 1, the new facility is marred by a spelling mistake — etched in stone. A carved quote from artist Georgia O’Keeffe sports a misspelling of her name, with only one F. “We clearly F-ed this one up and it’s being fixed,” said MTA communications director Tim Minton. However, he couldn’t say when the edit would be complete. [NBC New York, 2/1/2023]

Wait, What?

A couple in Etobicoke, Toronto, left on an extended business trip in January 2022, CTV News reported. When they returned home months later, they were stunned to realize that their house had been sold and the new owners had moved in. Police said a man and woman impersonated the owners, hired a real estate agent, and listed the property using fake identification. Police are still looking for the imposters. [CTV News, 1/5/2023]

That Rule Doesn’t Apply to Me

On Jan. 16, Brazilian attorney Leandro Mathias de Novaes delivered his mother to the Laboratório Cura in Sao Paulo, where she was scheduled for an MRI. Before they both entered the MRI room, the New York Post reported, they were asked to remove any metal objects from their persons and signed a form detailing the protocols, but Novaes opted to not remove, or disclose, his concealed weapon. When the MRI’s magnetic field yanked the pistol from his waistband, it fired and struck him in the stomach; he was hospitalized for three weeks after the incident but died on Feb. 6. [New York Post, 2/9/2023]

Clothing Optional

Trevyn Wayne Hill, 21, of Las Vegas, let it all hang out on Jan. 28 when he approached another guest in a stairwell at the Des Moines (Iowa) Downtown Marriott, KCCI-TV reported. Court documents said Hill was naked and brandishing a toilet plunger when he yelled, “I’m going to [expletive] get you,” while chasing the other person. Hill cruised around the hotel in his birthday suit, destroying a sprinkler system and pulling several fire alarms before finally being subdued by firefighters. Hill pleaded not guilty to assault, first-degree criminal mischief, and disorderly conduct. [KCCI, 2/3/2023]

Send your weird news items with subject line WEIRD NEWS to WeirdNewsTips@amuniversal.com. News of the Weird is now a podcast on all major platforms! Visit newsoftheweirdpodcast.com to find out more.

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Reprinted with permission.
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Fun Stuff News of the Weird

News of the Weird: Week of 03/16/23

Awesome!

Jean Merritt of Philadelphia has a special knack for spreading goodwill. She writes letters. According to Philadelphia magazine, Merritt solicits mailing addresses and then responds with a handwritten (“in meticulous cursive”) letter on captivating stationery. Her missive to reporter Victor Fiorillo mentioned that she has an overabundance of writing papers and postcards. “I’ve been writing letters since I was a little girl, and never stopped,” Merritt said. Along with requested letters, she writes to people in nursing homes through Letters Against Isolation and to people in prisons. “My mother collected stationery, and I’m still using the stationery I found in her house when she died in 2011. … I see stationery on clearance, and I can’t resist it.” Sadly, she said most people don’t write her back. But, she noted, “Doing this is also just really good for my brain.” [Philadelphia magazine, 2/2/2023]

Suspicions Confirmed

Varsity basketball coach Jahmal Street and assistant coach Arlisha Boykins were fired from their positions at Churchland High School in Portsmouth, Virginia, after Boykins, 22, came off the bench as a sub in a Jan. 21 girls’ JV game, The Washington Post reported. The girl who was unavailable for the game was 13 years old. As a result of the incident, the team’s remaining games were canceled. Churchland investigated and held meetings with players and parents. “Coaches always preach to kids about integrity … so I was just shocked,” the father of the absent player said. He said his daughter will not attend Churchland next year. [Washington Post, 2/1/2023]

Unclear on the Concept

Musa Hasahya Kasera, 68, has a problem, but he admits it stems from his own irresponsibility, Yahoo! News reported. The eastern Ugandan man has 12 wives, 102 children, and 578 grandchildren. “At first it was a joke,” he said, “but now this has its problems. … Two of my wives left because I could not afford the basics like food, education, clothing.” Most of the family live in a house with a rusting corrugated iron roof on a mere two acres of land. “I can only remember the name of my first and the last born, but some of the children, I can’t recall their names,” Kasera lamented. Now his wives are using contraception; “I have learnt from my irresponsible act of producing so many children that I can’t look after,” he said. Horse, meet barn door. [Yahoo! News, 2/2/2023]

Americans Abroad

American animal rights activist Alicia Day, 34, was arrested in Moscow, Russia, on Feb. 1, according to Reuters, after she paraded a calf through Red Square, shouting, “Animals are not food!” In a Russian court, she was fined 20,000 rubles ($285) and sentenced to 13 days of “administrative arrest.” Although Day is in Russia on a tourist visa, she explained in court that she had a driver bring the calf to Red Square, so she could “show it a beautiful place in our beautiful country.” [Reuters, 2/1/2023]

A 34-year-old California man was arrested in Florence, Italy, on Jan. 26 after he drove his rented Fiat onto the Ponte Vecchio, a stone bridge dating from 1345 that spans the Arno River and is now a pedestrian walkway and shopping destination. SFGATE reported that the unnamed driver told police he couldn’t find parking and didn’t realize he was on the historic bridge. He was fined about 500 euros. [SFGATE, 1/31/2023]

Awwwwww

The Rhode Island Department of Health played along with the Cumberland, Rhode Island, police department after it received a request from a little girl for DNA testing on a partially eaten cookie and some gnawed-on carrot sticks, the Associated Press reported. She was hoping for a conclusive match for Santa Claus, but alas, the department said it was unable to “definitively confirm or refute the presence of Santa” in her home. However, it did find DNA closely matching Rangifer tarandus, or reindeer, on the carrots. [AP, 1/24/2023]

News of the Weird is now a podcast on all major platforms! To find out more, visit newsoftheweirdpodcast.com.

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Reprinted with permission.
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Fun Stuff News of the Weird

News of the Weird: Week of 03/09/23

New World Order

Sure, your fancy SUV may have ventilated seats and Wi-Fi, but does it have electrified door handles? The Guardian reported on Jan. 25 that a new vehicle has hit the market targeted at the particularly fearful driver — the Rezvani Vengeance. Costing up to $499,000, the Vengeance has bulletproof glass, strobe lights, wing mirrors that emit pepper spray, and no back windshield — instead, the driver can monitor a live video stream of what’s going on behind the car. Sure to win you a popularity contest in the pickup lane at your kid’s school, the Vengeance also has a loudspeaker so you can call to little Timmy without leaving the safety of your seat. Extras include bulletproof vests, helmets, and gas masks. The Irvine, California, company teases potential buyers on the website: “Vengeance is yours.” Wow. [Guardian, 1/25/2023]

Clothing Optional

Brittney Marie Reynolds, 35, entered St. Mary’s Cathedral in chilly Fargo, North Dakota, on Jan. 24 and was seen on security camera footage knocking over a potted plant, then approaching a large statue of Jesus on the wall, according to KMOV-TV. She ripped the statue from the wall and threw it to the floor, then headed back out — all while topless and shoeless, in temps under 20 degrees. Rev. Riley Durkin called police, who caught up with Reynolds as she bolted across the street. Officers noted that she wasn’t able to answer questions and appeared to be under the influence of a substance. [KMOV, 1/25/2023]

Meanwhile, in willful disobedience of every mother’s “wear clean underwear” edict, Timothy O’Rourke of Danville, New Hampshire, crashed his car on Jan. 25 and ran from the scene, wearing nary a stitch of clothing. WHDH-TV reported that officers found O’Rourke “running behind Main Street homes wearing no clothes and coated in his own blood.” He was charged with DWI and resisting arrest, and presumably given some jail garb to wear. [WHDH, 1/25/2023]

Awesome!

Vanyar, one of the equine competitors in the Tokay Stakes race on Jan. 22 in Nagoya, Japan, crossed the finish line first. However, Oddity Central reported, Vanyar was missing one thing, which led to his being disqualified: a rider. Vanyar’s jockey fell off as soon as they left the gate, and the second-place horse’s jockey couldn’t catch up to the riderless horse (although they were the technical winners). After crossing the finish line, Vanyar coolly slowed down and sauntered off toward the exit. [Oddity Central, 1/24/2023]

Special Delivery

During a basketball match between Duquesne University and Loyola Chicago in Pittsburgh on Jan. 25, officials briefly stopped play at the 16:10 mark of the second half, TribLive reported. At that moment, a man in a yellow hoodie walked onto the court and approached Loyola player Philip Alston, but apparently without malice: He had a McDonald’s bag in his hands, and a video recording caught him yelling, “DoorDash?” Commentators, officials, and players seemed stumped about who ordered the food, but someone finally claimed the delivery. A Duquesne official said he believed the event was staged, and sure enough, a close-up of the delivery guy reveals a microphone clipped to his T-shirt. [TribLive, 1/25/2023]

Inexplicable

During the height of the Covid-19 pandemic, when students in Harvey (Illinois) School District 152 were learning remotely, the district provided meals that families could pick up. According to WGN-TV, food service worker Vera Liddell, 66, allegedly helped herself to some of that food — to be specific, 11,000 cases of chicken wings. Liddell worked for the district for more than a decade. A business manager uncovered the plot during a routine audit, finding “individual invoices signed by Liddell for massive quantities of chicken wings, an item that was never served to students because they contain bones,” prosecutors said. Liddell would place the orders, then pick up the food in a district van. They didn’t reveal what Liddell did with the $1.5 million worth of wings. She was charged with theft. [WGN, 1/31/2023]

An unnamed 27-year-old man was arrested on Jan. 27 in Seattle after a homeowner returned to her house to find him in her bathroom, filling the tub with water. KOMO-TV reported that when police arrived, they discovered a smashed window and the burglar inside, “clothed but very wet, and the bathtub was full of water,” reports said. The intruder would not provide a motive for his strange break-in and was charged with residential burglary. [KOMO, 1/28/2023]

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News of the Weird: Week of 03/02/23

Dream Job

Five lucky participants will clear a cool $1,000 to do what they wanted to do anyway: Eat cheese before bedtime. Fox5-TV reported that Sleep Junkie, a mattress review website, hopes to test the legend that eating cheese before bed causes nightmares, so they’re asking “dairy dreamers” to consume a wide variety of cheeses, log their sleep, and provide feedback about sleep quality, energy levels, and bad dreams. The best part? Participants will be reimbursed for the cheese! The catch: You have to sleep alone. [Fox5, 1/20/2023]

Police Report

A 31-year-old woman was charged with two counts of robbery and possession of a weapon (ahem) on Jan. 22 in Winnipeg, Manitoba, after a puzzling attempt to steal a pizza, the CBC reported. Around 3 a.m., she allegedly entered a crowded restaurant and demanded a pizza, brandishing a firecracker as a threat. She was denied the pie, so she lit the firework and ran off with a pizza. Outside the restaurant, she got into a cab, but the driver asked her to get out because she was being belligerent. When the driver stepped out of the car, she jumped into his seat and took off, dragging the 54-year-old several meters down the street. Officers caught up with the stolen cab and caught the pizza thief when she became stuck in a snowbank. [CBC, 1/23/2023]

That Rule Doesn’t Apply to Me

A dump truck driver in Contra Costa County, California, either couldn’t read or didn’t care when he barreled through a road closure barricade on Jan. 23, KTVU-TV reported, and ended up with his front left wheel in a sinkhole. The “road closed” sign was found beneath his vehicle, and the driver escaped without injury. Excessive rains have caused “flooding, mudslides, sinkholes, and other issues” in the area, county officials noted. [KTVU, 1/23/2023]

Bright Idea

If you’re looking for a crafty project for 2023, the online shop Savor has you covered, Slate reported. For the low, low price of $46.95, you can put together your own “In Case I Go Missing” binder, which Savor says “makes it super easy for the true-crime obsessed to record their key stats for their loved ones.” Those facts include medical and financial information, fingerprints, and lists of “hangout spots.” One woman said she added “a hair sample just in case they need it for DNA testing.” Elizabeth Jeglic, a professor at the John Jay College of Criminal Justice, soothingly says, “The majority of adults will not go missing or be kidnapped.” Her colleague Patrick McLaughlin offers some ideas for the kit, though: recent photos; the unlock code for your phone; pics of tattoos, scars, or birthmarks; handwriting samples — but he warns that such binders might not be admissible as evidence. [Slate, 1/22/2023]

That Guy

Dennis Garsjo, 73, of Glasgow, Montana, may not know your name when he greets you on the street, but he’ll call out to you anyway, using your birthday. “Top of the morning to ya, April 11,” he might say, according to KRTV. Garsjo has memorized more than 3,000 birthdays and says he came by the talent naturally. “My mother remembered all our relatives’ birthdays before she started getting dementia,” he said. “I don’t think my talent is all that special. I’m more impressed by musicians who can play a song from memory on the piano.” Still, residents of Prairie Ridge Village, where he works, enjoy The Birthday Guy, as he’s known, and he loves surprising people with their special day. [KRTV, 1/26/2023]

News You Can Use

KFC Thailand partnered with perfume experts during the Lunar New Year to create what every finger-lickin’ good fan wants: fried chicken incense. Oddity Central reported that the incense sticks look good enough to eat and smell even better. Alas, you can’t buy them: The incense will be awarded through a raffle on KFC Thailand’s Facebook page. [Oddity Central, 1/20/2023]

Send your weird news items with subject line WEIRD NEWS to WeirdNewsTips@amuniversal.com. News of the Weird is now a podcast on all major platforms! Visit newsoftheweirdpodcast.com for more.

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Reprinted with permission.
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News of the Weird: Week of 02/23/23

Animal Antics

Carrier pigeons have been couriers of legitimate and nefarious items for centuries, but officials at the Pacific Institution in Abbotsford, British Columbia, nonetheless were stunned when a gray bird with a tiny backpack landed in a fenced inmate prison yard on Dec. 29. The CBC reported that officers “had to corner it,” according to John Randle, Pacific regional president of the Union for Canadian Correctional Officers. “You can imagine how that would look, trying to catch a pigeon.” After some time, they were able to grab it and remove the package, which contained about 30 grams of crystal meth. “We’ve been focusing so much on drone interdiction … Now we have to look at, I guess, pigeons again,” Randle said. They set the little guy free and are investigating its origin. [CBC, 1/6/2023]

Illustration: Jeanne Seagle

Family Values

It’s important to encourage your children in their scholastic endeavors. But an unnamed mother in LaGrange, New York, took parental support too far when she snuck into Arlington High School on Jan. 17 before school started to watch her freshman daughter beat up another girl. The Mid Hudson News reported that Mom was caught on video using vulgar language and egging her daughter on as the girls tussled. Superintendent Dave Moyer said the woman blended in with the students coming to school by wearing a backpack. “The students and the mother involved … will be held accountable for their actions,” Moyer said. [Mid Hudson News, 1/18/2023]

WSMV-TV reported that a car that crashed into a mailbox in Nashville, Tennessee, on Jan. 14 was driven by an underage motorist —really underage, as in 5 years old. The child’s father, John Edwin Harris, 53, was seen by a witness grabbing the kid and running from the scene, police said. Officers found multiple open bottles of alcohol inside and ran the tags; when they arrived at Harris’ home, he was driving away in his wife’s car. He failed a field sobriety test, could barely stand up, and smelled of alcohol. He was charged with DUI and leaving the scene of an accident — where’s the child endangerment charge?! — and was released on $4,000 bond. [WSMV, 1/16/2023]

Repeat Offender

An unnamed 62-year-old man from Garfield Heights, Ohio, was arrested — for the 70th time — in early January after he allegedly stole a shopping cart full of packaged meat to sell to restaurants, WJW-TV reported. The Walmart in South Euclid alerted authorities to the theft; in the parking lot, the thief transferred the goods to a stolen suitcase and threw what wouldn’t fit in a dumpster. He told officers he sells the meat half-price to area restaurants. He was booked, again, for theft. [WSW, 1/10/2023]

It’s Come to This

Between Oct. 1 and Dec. 31 of 2022, U.S. Customs and Border Protection reported a 108 percent increase in a certain smuggled item at ports of entry, Fox5-TV reported on Jan. 18. It wasn’t fentanyl or heroin, though. Seized egg products and poultry were the hot catch as prices soared in the United States. “My advice is, don’t bring them over,” said CBP supervisory agriculture specialist Charles Payne. Or, he advised, if you do, declare them so you won’t be fined. Thirty eggs in Juarez, Mexico, cost $3.40 — a fraction of what they’d cost in the U.S. because of an outbreak of avian flu that forced producers to euthanize 43 million egg-laying hens. [Fox5, 1/18/2023]

Least Competent Criminal

Federal prosecutors charged Mohammed Chowdhury, 46, of Boston with one count of murder-for-hire on Jan. 17, ABC News reported, after he allegedly contracted with “hired killers,” aka federal agents, on the internet. Chowdhury had shared his wife’s and her boyfriend’s work and home locations, photos, and work schedules with the contractors, and wanted both of them snuffed out — all for $8,000, with a $500 down payment. The agents met with Chowdhury for two months to plan the murders. “No evidence. No evidence from like, you know, that, uh, I did something, you know?” Chowdhury told them. He was arrested as they met to collect the down payment; he could face up to 10 years in prison. [ABC News, 1/19/2023]

Awesome!

Dominican sailor Elvis Francois, 47, was rescued by the Colombian navy on Jan. 18 after surviving 24 days drifting from the island of St. Martin in the Netherlands Antilles, NPR reported. Francois said he had been making repairs to a sailboat when currents swept it out to sea. He scrawled “help” on the boat’s hull, then survived on a bottle of ketchup, garlic powder, seasoning cubes, and collected rainwater while he waited for a rescue. “I called my friends, they tried to contact me, but I lost the signal,” Francois said. “There was nothing else to do but sit and wait.” He finally caught the attention of a passing airplane by signaling with a mirror. “I thank the coast guard. If it weren’t for them, I wouldn’t be telling the story,” he said. [NPR, 1/19/2023]

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Reprinted with permission.
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News of the Weird: Week of 2/16/23

Ewwww

Muscle Shoals, Alabama, experienced a thunderstorm on Dec. 10 that brought more than lightning and heavy rain, WHNT-TV reported. The city’s utility board manager, James Vance, said lightning struck controls at a sewer pump station, which allowed almost 2,000 gallons of sewage to flow into the streets of the Camden Cove subdivision. The sludge eventually flowed into a stormwater retention pond, and utility crews were able to clean up the mess. [WHNT, 12/13/2022]

New World Order

People. Can’t we all agree that fast food isn’t worth a human life? On Dec. 12 at a KFC restaurant in St. Louis, Fox2-TV reported, a man in the drive-thru asked for corn with his meal. When the employee told him they were out of corn, he made threatening remarks, then drove up to the window displaying a handgun. A 25-year-old employee went outside to speak with the suspect, who allegedly shot him. The victim was hospitalized with his injuries. The suspect took off after the shooting; police are still looking for him. [Fox2, 12/13/2022]

Irony

Early on Jan. 14, in Monterrey, Mexico, Carlos Alonso, 32, allegedly broke a glass door at Christ the King Parish and entered, intending to rob the church, Catholic News Agency reported. But as he tried to flee with a statue of St. Michael the Archangel in hand, he tripped and fell on the angel’s sword, seriously wounding his neck. Passersby saw the injured Alonso and called for help; he is expected to be charged after he recovers from the fall. The statue was unharmed. [CNA, 1/17/2023]

Recent Alarming Headline

On Jan. 16, a drive-thru customer at a coffee shop in Auburn, Washington, wanted more than an extra shot, KCRA-TV reported. As the barista handed Matthew Darnell, 38, his change through the window, a surveillance camera caught him grabbing her arm and pulling her toward him as he fumbled with a zip tie. The barista was able to pull away from him and close the windows as his dollar bills went flying. He drove off, but a distinctive “Chevrolet” tattoo on his arm was captured on video, along with his side profile. Police later reported that Darnell had been arrested at his home in Auburn and was held on $500,000 bail. [KCRA, 1/19/2023]

Molehill, Meet Mountain

After getting into a dispute with staff at Jinling Purple Mountain Hotel in Shanghai on Jan. 10 over a misplaced laptop, a 28-year-old man named Chen decided to escalate, CBS News reported. He crashed his car through the glass lobby doors and careened around the space, knocking over fixtures and terrifying other guests, who tried to get the driver out of the car. “Do you have any idea what you’ve done? Are you crazy? Are you?” onlookers screamed at him. As he attempted to exit the lobby, he hit a door frame and came to a stop, and police took him into custody. It turns out the laptop had been stolen and was found outside the hotel; no one was injured. [CBS News, 1/11/2023]

Fail

When Minnechaug Regional High School in Wilbraham, Massachusetts, was built in 2012, the district installed a high-tech lighting system that was intended to save on energy costs, NBC News reported. But the software that controls the lights failed on Aug. 24, 2021, and every light in the school has been on since then. Aaron Osborne, the assistant superintendent for the district, says the glitch is costing taxpayers “in the thousands of dollars per month on average, but not in the tens of thousands.” Teachers have removed bulbs where possible, and staff have shut off breakers to darken some of the exterior lighting. But help is on the way! Parts from China have arrived to fix the problem, which is expected to be completed in February. [NBC News, 1/19/2023]

Send your weird news items with subject line WEIRD NEWS to WeirdNewsTips@amuniversal.com.

News of the Weird is now a podcast on all major platforms! Find out more at newsoftheweirdpodcast.com.

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Letter From The Editor Opinion

Extra! Extra! Something New’s Stirring in the Flyer

I am so excited! I wish you could have seen me last week when I realized I was going to be able to bring some old favorites back into the pages of the Memphis Flyer. Just giddy as all get-out! Grinnin’ and whistlin’ and dancin’ a jig … well, I wasn’t really whistling. I’ve never been able to get much out aside from a tea-kettle-like whisper. Anyway, after our tasting for the fall beer guide we published a couple weeks back, we (may have been buzzed and) got to talking about changes we might want to implement, what new and exciting — or simply reader-friendly and engaging — things we could do to make the paper bigger, better, and weirder.

We’ve still got some ideas stewing, but we really went for it this week. And I am excited for y’all, too! I’m also excited for the handful of coworkers who are going to be just as surprised as you are when they crack open this week’s issue. I did my best to keep this a secret outside of the folks who work in the design and copyediting trenches of producing this paper.

Longtime readers will surely recognize some changes — and the return of some fun and super-useful content — all in a slightly larger, 32-page package that allowed us the breathing room to TCB on these goals. Some of you may remember the weekly insights offered by Rob Brezsny with his Free Will Astrology horoscopes. His work has been syndicated for years by alt-weeklies across the U.S. and was in our very own paper for a long time. It was cut some years back when so many publications like ours downsized and focused more closely on original content in limited print space. Another item that was cut — that I continue to be asked about when the Flyer comes up in conversation — is News of the Weird, a compilation of strange and surreal news stories from headlines across the globe. Well, guess what, lovelies? They’re baaaaack!

Also gracing these pages once again is our After Dark live music calendar. This is a bit of a trial run on those listings, as we’ve not printed them since the Before Times. But live music is kicking and thriving in the city now, and we believe this to be a valuable resource. If you’re in a band or do promotions for local venues, please send your music events to calendar@memphisflyer.com with the subject line AFTER DARK.

Were you tired of having to dig out a magnifying glass to read the clues on The New York Times crossword puzzle? Did you have to use the smallest pen in the world to fill in the answers in those teeny-tiny boxes? We’ve got great news for you (and for the many folks who’ve complained about it over the years) — we upsized the puzzle!

Lastly on the new-and-different front this week is a “now playing” conclusion to the film/TV section, where we’re testing finishing up there with a rundown of must-see films currently in theaters.

I’m new to this position and title, but I’m not new here, as you may have read in my introductory official editor’s note a few weeks back. I started out as a reader more than two decades ago — literally just a kid. I looked to the Flyer for the fun stuff — like astrology and weird news from around the world, long before we all scrolled viral videos on our phones. The extensive live music, arts, food, theater, film (etc.!) event listings helped me plan my weekends, and showed me just how much Memphis had to offer in terms of entertainment. And of course these were icing on the cake for the unmatched news reporting, politics analysis, event highlights, music and film reviews, food coverage, poignant opinion pieces (etc.!) that could be found in every issue, every single week.

We’re hoping you all will find these additions, along with our outstanding standard content, informative, fun, and useful — and we’re hoping some new readers will join us on this journey as we make the Flyer bigger, better, and weirder! (And boy, there are a lot of exclamation marks in this column! Did I mention I was excited?) With that said, after you’ve read through this week’s issue, pass your copy along to a friend or colleague. Share the love and legacy of Memphis’ alternative weekly newspaper — and stay tuned for what comes next!

Categories
Cover Feature News

Beside Still Waters: The Life and Art of Jeanne Seagle

Jeanne Seagle’s favorite Bible verse begins, “He leadeth me beside still waters and he restoreth my soul.”

“I’m not religious; don’t get me wrong,” Seagle says. “But I had to learn my Bible verses as a kid. And I remember them. I really like that one.”

Her own still waters are found at Dacus Lake, the subject of “Beside Still Waters,” Seagle’s first one-person art show at L Ross Gallery.

Fletcher Golden

‘Jeanne In Fog’

“My subject matter is the land inside the levee right across the Mississippi River from Downtown. Dacus Lake,” she says. “I have a great affinity for that land. I’ve always loved to go across the river, from the time when I first moved to Memphis. It was so much fun to go ride around in the fields and go down to the sandbars. I go over there a lot. It’s just a great getaway from Midtown Memphis. I can drive over the bridge and be over in the wilderness in 20 minutes.”

Seagle’s show includes 11 large black-and-white drawings and 11 watercolors of the Dacus Lake area. She takes photographs, which she uses for her drawings. “They’re very precise. Very photo-realistic drawings. It takes me about a month to do each one.”

Jeanne Seagle

of Humor,’ News of the Weird illustration for the ‘Memphis Flyer’

During her art career, Seagle, 72, has worked as an illustrator for ad agencies and publications, including the Memphis Flyer, where her cartoons illustrated News of the Weird for many years. Her public art can be seen at St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital, Le Bonheur Children’s Hospital, and Methodist University Hospital. Books that feature her illustrations include Mickey and the Golem by Steve Stern and Mommy Without Hair by Selene Benitone.

But Dacus Lake has flowed through her artwork for decades.

In the mid-1990s, before they were married, Seagle and Fletcher Golden spent a lot of time at Dacus Lake, where Golden lived for a while in a mobile home. “I’d just go over every Friday night and ride through the bean fields. I really got to know the land over there. I house-sat for him, and I would just go down to the river and paint and draw.”

The area was a new world for Seagle, who was born in Pueblo, Colorado. “All of my art was about going out to Colorado to visit my family,” she says. “I just did brightly colored paintings of mountains and canyons and mesas and that kind of thing. I’d go out there every year and ride around and paint.”

When her elderly relatives died and she stopped making the trip to Colorado, Seagle was at a loss for subject matter. “I was not all that crazy about the flat Delta land. But little by little I started seeing all the subtle beauty and the surprises you find when you get up close in the swampland and the waterways. And I started making pictures of this Delta land.”

It never stays the same, she says. “It floods every year. It’s inside the levee, and that makes the landscape change. The waters rise and recede. It’s a great place for all kinds of water birds and animals to live. And because it floods every year, it’s not developed. It keeps the humans away. Because of that, there are animals that just roam up and down the Mississippi for hundreds and hundreds of miles. 

“If you go early in the morning, you see these animals. I saw a panther one time when I got up early and was sitting quietly doing some watercolor painting.”

And then there are the trees. “Because it floods, the roads are elevated so that trees grow up around them, but the trees take on very strange shapes, too, because of the Delta tornadoes that come through and tear off the limbs of the trees. They’re all raggedy-looking trees that are so unusual.”

Jeanne Seagle

charcoal pencil on paper

The area does attract some eccentric people, Seagle says. “When Fletcher lived there and I was visiting on a regular basis, there was a bait shop on stilts. It was kind of a community gathering place.”

And, she says, “There were other people living over there at the fish camp — people who don’t like living in civilization. They were people who are close to the land, people who hunt for beaver tails. Just very earthy, country people who have known all about the country, and the last thing they want to do is live in civilization. We got to know them, and that was really interesting.”

Seagle’s love of nature began when she was a child. Her family moved from Colorado to Mississippi when she was very young, then they moved to the woods of Arkansas when she was five. “My father worked for the department of forestry, and he got a job as a forest ranger in Western Arkansas in the Ouachita Mountains. As a little child, I was living in this forest. An only child.”

Seagle spent time drawing and walking through the woods by herself. “Being all alone with no brothers and sisters out in the country was probably a big influence,” she says. “If I’d been living in town and had lots of people to play with, I might not have become an artist.”

She was known for her art ability in school. “I remember in the first grade I would draw tattoos on little boys and I’d draw paper dolls for the little girls. I charged a dime. I kept on doing that all through school. I was the class artist.”

In high school, Seagle took an art class trip to Memphis Academy of Art, which later became Memphis College of Art. “I saw these kids in there that were beatniks. I loved that. I really wanted to be a beatnik. So when I got old enough to go to college, I came up here.”

She moved to Memphis in 1967. “By this time, the Art Academy had all the great people: Ted Rust, Bill Womack, John Mcintire, Burton Callicott, Ted Faiers, Veda Reed, Bill Roberson. Murray Riss started teaching when I was there. It was just wonderful to be around these people, and I got to take classes from all of them.”

Seagle majored in illustration. “When I was a little girl, I loved looking at my mother’s magazines. I really was not exposed to art galleries. We lived in the forest ranger station in Western Arkansas, so the art that I saw was in my mother’s magazines. And I wanted to be a magazine illustrator, a children’s book illustrator.”

Her schooling was interrupted after she married her first husband, a medical student. “My first marriage was very brief — to somebody that I met here in Memphis, and we moved to Los Angeles.” That was “a different lifetime,” Seagle says. “He was gone most of the time, being an intern at the hospital.”

Jeanne Seagle

Jeanne Seagle and Pomegrante Studio

After her divorce, Seagle returned to Memphis, where she completed her degree at the Art Academy.

She took a job as assistant executive designer with Dobbs Houses. “I dressed like the young executives. I wanted to be a young executive. I worked at Dobbs Houses in the interior design department and went to work in a high-rise building and dressed up with hose and skirts.”

Then, she says, “The director of my department was found to be embezzling from the company and the whole department was fired. That’s when I changed. I was fired from the executive track and so I just kind of totally changed then and relaxed and became more of a Bohemian, I guess.”

In 1973, Seagle got a job working with a couple of her classmates, Ellis Chappell and Jim Williams, at The Grafe, the in-house graphics agency for Stax Records. They created and produced Stax album covers.

When The Grafe downsized, Seagle became a founder of Chappell, Williams and Seagle, an illustration studio in the Timpani Building, an old cotton warehouse. The Malmo & Associates ad agency was their biggest client. After five years, they sold the building.

“We made a bunch of money,” Seagle says. “So I just went to Europe, traveled around, went to all the art museums. I came back and I started doing fine art.”

When her money ran out, she went to work for Malmo & Associates.

In 1993, Seagle became a freelancer. A major client was Contemporary Media, Inc., where she became a regular illustrator for the Memphis Flyer. She illustrated the Flyer‘s News of the Weird column for 20 years. “That was great training for what I’m doing now,” she says, “which is obsessive black-and-white drawings.”

Her Flyer illustrations were composed of “little tiny dots,” she says. “You had to be obsessive-compulsive to do it. And that’s exactly what I’m doing now in my landscape drawings. I’m just doing these tiny little marks that take forever to do. Everybody looks at them and says, ‘Oh, my God. You just have such patience to do that.'”

Seagle also began doing public art, landing UrbanArt Commission grants to create mosaic murals on two trolley stops on Madison.

In 2012, she created the 16-foot sculpture, I Can Fly, at Le Bonheur: “It’s a giant obelisk with mosaics on all four sides depicting the seasons with children playing, climbing trees. On top is a giant bluebird about the size of a Volkswagen Beetle with a little kid riding on top of it.”

The next year, she created the 16-foot-tall Genome Kids sculpture at St. Jude. She describes it as “a giant DNA helix with whimsical-looking little children climbing it.”

She then did a series of 6-foot square paintings, including “giant painted quilts,” at Methodist.

“I made a lot of money,” she says, “and I was able to, pretty much, retire from commercial art work and turn to fine art.”

She began booking shows, beginning with a one-person show at the Delta Cultural Center in Helena. Then, she says, “Linda Ross called me up and asked me to be in one of her shows. That was really a great turning point in my fine art career, to be able to be in a well-respected gallery. I’ve been in shows with her for five or six years.”

Ross, now retired from the gallery, says, “What has always attracted me to an artist is the movement, the feeling, of the line work in their art. So it’s no wonder that I found Jeanne’s body of work so compelling. She has such a deft hand, whether it’s the broader brush strokes in her quietly moving watercolors or the delicate-layered markings in her stunning penciled landscapes. Simply masterful.”

Jeanne Seagle

‘Flooded Shoreline,’ charcoal pencil on paper

Seagle’s current show at L Ross Gallery was supposed to open in the spring but was pushed back because of the pandemic. Originally, Seagle thought the “the fog, the water, and these stark winter trees” would be “too depressing” for a spring show. “Then, as it turned out, with the pandemic, I don’t think pretty pastel-colored pictures of things would be very appropriate for our world right now. These mysterious, dark pictures are very appropriate.”

“The level of detail and technical skill in these pieces speak for themselves,” says L Ross Gallery owner Laurie Brown. “But, to my mind, what really sets Jeanne’s work apart is her ability to capture the quiet, ephemeral moments of life so exquisitely. You can almost hear the breeze whispering through the branches or feel the cool dampness of the fog.”

As for future plans, Seagle says, “I want to make bigger pictures, and I really want to start being in museums.”

Seagle and Golden, who have been married almost 20 years, live on an acre of land in Cooper-Young. “It’s made the pandemic much more bearable to have all this land, all these trees in our backyard. It really looks like we are living out in the country.”

Seagle still makes the trip to Dacus Lake. “I’m still totally fascinated with this landscape. It’s always changing. The water conditions are always changing. The floods and the water rising, morning and night, and the light — it’s just full of ever-changing subject matter that thrills me.”

“Beside Still Waters” is on view through September 5th at L Ross Gallery.