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Fly On The Wall

Bottoms Up

It’s so early in the new year, and we already have a contender for most egregious abuse of 911. Sixty-eight-year-old Rosie Pate was arrested last week after she called the emergency number to report that she was out of beer and her unhelpful granddaughter refused to make a beer run.

Breakfast at Family Dollar

The good news: Individually packaged fried eggs and waffles are now available at area Family Dollars, and they’re only a dollar each.

The bad news: These food items are made out of marshmallow and gummy candy. That means they probably aren’t part of a balanced breakfast. Here’s a picture of what they look like on a plate.