Water Taxis – Memphis Flyer

Greg Cravens

About Jackson Baker’s cover story on Mike Matthews, “It Only Hurts When He Laughs” …

I commend Jackson Baker for this article. Mike is a compelling enough personality by himself, but he becomes even more larger-than-life thanks to the excellent writing in this piece. Very nice work, Jackson, and welcome back, Mike. You can’t keep a good Watchdog down.

Ken Jobe

Wonderful story about a real reporter with a heart and courage. As a photographer and videographer in Memphis for over 40 years, I have often found myself at news events, back in the line of cameramen and reporters. The people we all know from TV sometimes are very different off-camera. Some are not very nice. Over the years, I have seen some offensive behavior from reporters who magically transformed when they picked up a mic and stood in front of a camera. Most are not like this, but Mike Matthews is even better off camera.

He is exactly what we need on the air — and in our city: depth, truth, humility, humor, and most of all, love.

Peter Ceren

About Toby Sells’ post, “MATA Hopes for May Return of Trolleys” …

So MATA’s short-term solution is returning some trolleys to service 11 months after they were supposed to be down for only three or four months? As the late Don Poier used to say, “Only in the movies, and in Memphis.”

Midtown Mark

About Les Smith’s column, “The Natural” …

Right on point. I agree about Lee Harris and Berlin Boyd, too. We have too much talent in Memphis just sitting around on their hands, waiting for a chance at the plate. We shouldn’t settle for another retread, no matter how great a guy he is. There is, quite simply, too much at stake. It’s time for fresh people and fresh ideas.

OakTree

About Bruce VanWyngarden’s column, “Sammons ’R Us” …

I’m available to take over the airport authority. I’m totally unqualified, so I can give it my full, unqualified attention.

Jeff

About Bruce VanWyngarden’s column, “The Museum of Terrible Ideas” …

Surely there was a typo in the statement that the Riverfront Development Corporation put up $200,000 and got $800,000 more from the Feds to study that goofy water taxis on the river idea. If it was not a typo, what in the world are they spending the money on? Is the contractor one of the decision-maker’s brother-in-law?

Harry Freeman

About Chris Davis’ Viewpoint, “The 75 Percent Rule” … I am writing on behalf of Corrections Corporation of America (CCA) to request a correction to the op-ed “The 75 Percent Rule,” which appeared on the Memphis Flyer website on March 5th.

Specifically, the piece states: “The proposed legislation, in the long run, benefits nobody but Todd’s fellow ALEC member, the Corrections Corporation of America, a private company that operates three of Tennessee’s 14 prisons.” This is false. CCA’s non-voting membership with ALEC ended in 2010. As such, CCA is not a current member of ALEC.

Jonathan Burns

Senior Manager, Public Affairs, CCA

A couple years ago, Flyer writer Chris Davis wrote a funny piece about Beale Street Landing, suggesting that it would be a great place to house the “Museum of Terrible Ideas.” I guess there was something about the giant corkscrew boat-landing ramp and the Lego-colored elevator shaft — and the long-delayed project’s $40 million price tag — that led him to make that suggestion.

Now that it’s built, I have nothing against Beale Street Landing. It’s a nice facility with great river views and a decent little restaurant. The Flyer even held its Best of Memphis party there last fall. So I guess the Museum of Terrible Ideas will have to find another home.

Maybe the Mid-South Coliseum could house the MTI. It’s certainly big enough, and it’s in the center of another possibly terrible idea — the Fairgrounds TMZ — a top-down project with few supporters outside of city hall.

Think of the possibities: There could be an exhibit showing how the feds once tried to put a freeway through the middle of one of the city’s great historic neighborhoods, a project that would have destroyed Midtown, the Sears Building project, Overton Park, and the Memphis Zoo. There could be an exhibit showing the thwarted plans to destroy the historic buildings of Overton Square and put in a low-end grocery store. There could be a section devoted to all our dead malls; a section honoring the former Airport Authority for its deft negotiations with Delta Airlines. Hell, there could be a whole wing dedicated to the terrible ideas of Senator Brian Kelsey.

And now there’s a new terrible idea that’s being, er, floated: water taxis. The Riverfront Development Corporation has ponied up $200,000, and gotten the feds to ante up $800,000, for a study on the feasibility of water taxis that would “ferry people from Bass Pro to Beale Street Landing and Mud Island.”

A 2013 report states: “Taxis are currently imagined as traipsing up and down the Wolf River Harbor, but the only water taxi that is likely to be effective at attracting people to Mud Island will be one that functions like a bridge, free of charge, zipping back and forth across the channel, always in sight, and never more than a few minutes away.”

This presumes that there are people who want to get to the tip of Mud Island. And that you can “zip” around the harbor. Both are out-of-town-concocted fantasies.

I have a little boat that’s docked in the Wolf River Harbor. It’s a no-wake zone, limiting boats to a speed that a casual jogger can easily surpass. If you speed up, you get ticketed by the harbor patrol, and you provoke the Asian carp to start jumping. There are kayakers and canoeists and fishermen in small jon boats. You can’t zip. A no-wake trip from Bass Pro to Beale Street Landing would take 20 minutes.

If water taxis were a good idea, someone would have started a water taxi business. It is, in fact, a terrible idea and the MTI should start clearing space now for its water taxi exhibit.

Here’s a good idea: Get the damn trolleys running before May, when Music Fest starts and Bass Pro opens and the Grizzlies are in the playoffs. Call ’em “land taxis” if it makes you feel better.