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Campus police are called to quell a disturbance during a University of Memphis Student Government Association meeting. It seems two members, Brian Kennedy and KeeShanda Eddings, were squabbling over parliamentary procedure, and, according to The Daily Helmsman, Kennedy “thrust a copy of Robert’s Rules for Dummies into [Eddings’] hands and asked her to prove him wrong.” Did anyone second this motion?

Good news for Memphis. We aren’t America’s most dangerous city. Hooray! A new report published by CQ Press gives that (dis)honor to Detroit. Of course, we are still ranked eighth — not really something to brag about.

First we hear that actress Kate Beckinsale is admitted to a local hospital for rather scary symptoms — numbness in a leg and arm. Then her spokesperson says she was just visiting her assistant in the hospital. Then we learn that Beckinsale was indeed treated, but for a pinched nerve. Considering she’s in town filming a movie called Nothing But the Truth, it would be nice if someone would tell the truth for a change.

A controversial “Nova” program on intelligent design — which either supports or debunks the theory of evolution, depending on who you ask — doesn’t air in Memphis. Instead, WKNO decides to air a rerun about World War II. We can remember when Channel 10’s call letters stood for “knowledge.”