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WHOLE LOT OF SHAKING

Recent tests conducted by the University of Memphis’ center for Earthquake Research produced some less-than-encouraging data. A series of explosions were set off along the Mississippi River to deermine how shock waves would move through sediment layers. Arch Johnson, director of the center, has been quoted as saying, “It seems that instead of being damped out, [potentially damaging waves]sort of resonated out to longer distances.” So, in case of a quake, follow the standard procedure: Place head between legs, kiss bootie goodbye.